Category: Jack & Karen

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Santa Baby!

Hey sex fans,

It’s Black Friday; the day the holiday shopping madness starts in earnest.  I know some of you live for this time of the year, so The Dr Dick Review Crew will do our part.  This is Week 3 of this our Holiday Gift Giving Guide.

This week we will hear from Review Crew members:  Denise, Jack & Karen and Gina & Kevin.

First up, our friends and neighbors (BC, Canada), the extraordinary women at Eros & Isis send a work of art.

Sweet Pea —— $68.00

Denise
I have the pleasure of introducing you to a luscious little playmate, Sweet Pea, from a fantastic new company in British Columbia, Canada, Eros & Isis.  It’s such a rare find to discover a boutique adult products company.  I am so over the cookie-cutter, mass-produced stuff made of dubious materials that floods the marketplace.  How refreshing to discover a manufacturer with an environmental consciousness.  Long live Eros & Isis!

Sweet Pea is a petite, 3.5” x 2.5”, bulbous headed vibe made of 100% platinum SweetPeasilicone. It’s completely safe and non-toxic, which includes the natural mineral pigment embedded into the silicone to achieve the antique look of their toys.  It is meticulously sculpted, molded and cast by hand to appear as a turn of the century collectible.  It really is unique.  I haven’t seen its like anywhere else.

Sweet Pea features a removable one-speed bullet vibrator that can be replaced or upgraded to any bullet-style unit.  The bullet come packed with batteries, I’m happy to report.  So your first ride is on the house.  You can use Sweet Pea externally, but I prefer it as a pussy plug.  The sculpted base delivers delicious stimulation to my lips and clit.  And it is so soft and comfortable I can wear for an extended time. Very nice!

There’s a bit of a secret to removing bullet vibe from the base for cleanup or when you need to change the batteries.  Simply add a few drops of water-based lube between the vibe and the hole it’s in.  Remember only water-based lube on a beautiful silicone toy like this. Work the lube around a little; apply pressure to the base of the toy above the vibe and PRESTO!  The vibe pops out.

Sweet Pea is just one of the gorgeous Eros & Isis toys and each is available in Gold, Silver, and Jade.  The silicone makes the toys easy to clean with soap and water.  But it also can be sterilized in boiling water or in the dishwasher; sans the vibe, of course.

The packaging is minimal, which is fine.  However, there is one thing I would suggest.  I really believe they need to add some kind of label to their packaging that touts they very special nature of their toys — handmade, nontoxic, 100% premium silicone, etc.  I know you can read about these things on their site and in their beautiful downloadable catalogue.  (Which you absolutely must download!)  But I don’t think that’s nearly enough.  For example, if I were to give Sweet Pea as a gift, I would want the packaging to tell the lucky person I’m giving it to all about the marvelous qualities of this special toy.

Looking for a unique gift for someone very special?  Take my advice and shop at Eros & Isis.

Next, we have another Good Vibrations Ambassador Review.

Smartballs Teneo UNO & DUO —— $34.00 & $44.00

Gina & Kevin
Kevin:  “Smartballs Teneo are Fun Factory’s take on a very old idea, Ben Wa Balls.  You know what those are, right?  They are insertable balls that were invented hundreds of years ago, to enhance sexual stimulation and to exercise a woman’s PC muscles (pubococcygeus muscle). But since men have PC muscles too, I wanted to join in the fun.  In other words, you do your Kegel exercises with these babies while they are inserted vaginally or, in my case, anally.”13BG01-1
Gina:  “Smartballs are discreet.  And as Kevin suggests, they are both pleasurable and therapeutic.”
Kevin:  “Remember, the more Kegels you do, the more intense your orgasms are.  And this is true for both women and men.”
Gina:  “You simply insert the Smartballs Teneo UNO into your vagina.
Kevin:  “Or the Smartballs Teneo DUO into your ass. Or the other way around.”
Gina:  “Each Smartball unit has a finger groove for easy insertion and a tether that makes for easy removal.  You’ll want to use some lube when inserting.  And since these products are made of silicone, you can only use a water-based lube with them.”
Kevin:  “Here’s the special part.  Each Smartball has an inner ball that creates the a sweetest vibration sensation.”
Gina:  “They aren’t as heavy a ball as I am used to, but they are comfortable to wear.  And you can wear these for hours, if you’d like.  Take them dancing, to the grocery or for a walk in the park.  Every movement gives you pleasure while strengthening your PC muscles.”
Kevin:  “They are extremely durable and easy to clean. You can sterilize them in boiling water or pop ‘em in the dishwasher, which makes the Smartballs Teneo shareable. You can also wipe them down with a lint-free towel moistened with peroxide, rubbing alcohol or a 10% bleach solution.  Or just use soap and warm water for a quick cleanup.”
Gina:  “I like to masturbate with the Smartballs.  My orgasms are more intense, because my vaginal muscles contract around the vibrating balls.  Regular use can also help prevent stress incontinence.”
Kevin:  “And I like to squeeze one off with a ball or two in my ass.  They provide very pleasant prostate stimulation.  And ya never have to change batteries or wait for a recharge.”
Gina:  “We though Smartballs were a bit pricy.  I know LELO makes a set of similar balls using silicone for about the same price as the DUO set.”
Kevin:  “And you may need a few days to get used to these puppies, but once you do; you’ll love them.”
Gina:  “These make ideal gifts for a new mother or a menopausal woman.”
Kevin:  “Yeah, but just because these are designed for a woman, doesn’t mean a man can’t enjoy them.  Take it from me; consider these as ideal gifts for the all the butt pirates on your list too.”

Finally, the last in our series of Tristan Taormino’s educational and enrichment videos.

Tristan Taormino’s Expert Guide To Anal Pleasure For Men —— $29.95

Jack & Karen
Jack:  “We’re back with another butt sex video.  If you remember, last time we reviewed: The Expert Guide to Anal Sex.  I was all bummed out because that video didn’t include men as the receiving partners in anal sex.  How was I supposed to know that there was an entire video in this series that was all about pegging your guy?”
Karen:  “Tristan Taormino’s Expert Guide To Anal Pleasure For Men is just what we’ve been looking for.”DVDVIVID66
Jack:  “The disc starts out with a tutorial on the subject of male anal stimulation and goes from the anatomy itself through the actual processes involved. And our favorite ass-mistress, Tristan Taormino, is the host of this portion of the film.”
Karen:  “Then there are three sex scenes. The first involves Penny Flame and Devin.  Tristan is there in an advisory role for the opening portion of the scene.  Penny uses her fingers, a butt-plug, and a couple of strap-ons on Devin.  This is the part that interested me the most.”
Jack:  “Annie Cruz and Nomad are up next.  She finger fucks her guy with up to four of them at once.  DAMN!  She also uses a bead-like butt-plug, an even large butt-plug, and a strap-on on him.  Nomad fingers and fucks Annie’s ass with a glass dildo while she jills-off with vibrator.  Very Hot!”
Karen:  “I like the give and take between these two performers.”
Jack:  “The third scene features Jandi Lin and Christian. Christian takes Jandi’s fingers, a metal butt-plug, a glass-like butt-plug and a, curved black prostate stimulator in his ass. Jandi rims him a bit, although not convincingly.  Unfortunately there is no strap-on use here.”
Karen:  “There was a bunch of stuff in this scene that I didn’t like.  They had to do with exchanging bodily fluids, if you know what I mean.  I agree with Jack, the connection between the two performers seemed a little contrived.”
Jack:  “There are also tutorials in the bonus section.  They include; Safer Sex, How to Choose & Wear A Strap-On, Solo Prostate Stimulation—involving the guys from the movie, and Anal Hygiene and Enemas—featuring the gals.  This was just the stuff I had been looking for.  Some may find the tutorials a bit dry, especially if you’re watching this for the porn value.  But I think it’s important stuff to know, particularly for men, like me, who about to make the anal plunge.”
Karen:  “I agree; this is a terrific resource for the novice and the proficient alike.”
Jack:  “Like the last video we reviewed, Expert Guide To Anal Pleasure For Men, is a co-production with one of porn’s biggest companies, Vivid.  So you know it’s gonna be hot.  But it also goes a long way in helping demystify what is often a taboo subject for most straight couples.”
Karen:  “I like how fingers and toys, particularly plugs were used as a warm-up.  I know from my own experiences with anal sex that this king of play is essential.”
Jack:  “We recommend this DVD as a good place to start for couples considering anal sex where the man is on the receiving end.  Thank you Tristan for thinking of us guys!”

ENJOY

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Moveable Feast

Hey sex fans,

Here we are at Week 2 of this year’s Holiday Gift Giving Guide.  And we have two outstanding items for you.  One will, no doubt, be familiar to you.  The other is an outstanding example of erotic art.

The Dr Dick Review Crew Members: Kevin & Gina and Jack & Karen are here with the lowdown.

First, an old favorite from Vibratex.

Hitachi Magic Wand —— $47.50

Jack & Karen
Karen:  “You’re not gonna believe this, but on our way home from Dr Dick’s, after picking up the Hitachi Magic Wand as our review assignment.  Jack and I started to talk about the first time we’d ever seen a Hitachi.  Neither one of us knew of the others history with the Wand till that moment.  As it turned out, both of us had a similar introduction to this incredible vibe.”
Jack:  So we were driving home and I said I had used a Hitachi Magic WandZA919 before.  I told Karen that my mother had one when I was just a kid.  I used to see my dad use it on his back from time to time.  I never thought much of it till one day when I was home alone and had a little too much time on my hands.  I couldn’t have been more than 12 years old at the time.  I got the Hitachi from the cupboard, plugged it in and started running it all over my back, like I saw my dad do.  I innocently slipped it between my legs.  Holy shit, my little boy cock stood at attention till an almost painfully pleasurable thing happened only moments later.  I came for the first time then and there.  My skivvies were wet with something other than pee.  I though I had hurt myself.  I quickly put the Hitachi away and cleaned myself up; too afraid to tell anyone about the incident.”
Karen:  “I have a similar story.  My mother had a Hitachi too.  She kept it in her bedside cabinet.  I too was home alone one day; couldn’t have been more than 13; when I decided I’d see what this thing was all about.  I remember watching TV and running the vibe all over my body.  I put it to my cheek and it made my teeth rattle.  I thought that was really funny.  Absentmindedly, I ran it down over my chest.  I had already developed boobs by that time.  There was like electricity in my body that ran from my nipples to my crotch.  I moved the Wand southward and BANG.  I must have hit my clit through the jeans I was wearing.  My knees buckled and the rest is history.  I don’t think my mother ever knew how much I used her Hitachi.  But let’s just say I nearly wore out the thing.”
Jack:  “What more can we add to these stories.  What does one say about an institution; a legend.”
Karen:  “I wonder for the volumes that have been written about this, the granddaddy of all vibes, is it possible someone in our audience isn’t familiar with the Hitachi?”
Jack:  “If there is actually someone out there who has been living under a rock for that past 20+ years, here’s the lowdown.  The Hitachi is a very powerful 2-speed massager.  It has a 2″ long by 2″ diameter padded, vinyl coated head, attached to a 9″ long heavy-duty plastic handle.  And it is operated by electricity; so you have to plug it in.  This is what makes it so damn powerful.”
Karen:  “Absolutely, no other vibe, battery operated or rechargeable can even come close to the power of a Hitachi.”
Jack:  “There’s nothing sleek or stylish about this thing.  It’s pure function.  I like to cradle it under my balls when I jerk off.  I can feel the intense vibration all over my pelvis.  It’s fantastic.”
Karen:  “It’s loud too, but I don’t give a fuck.  For as quickly as it gets me off, it could sound like Mack truck for all I care.”
Jack:  “I can always tell when Karen is at her Hitachi.  She always makes more noise then usual; and that’s saying something.  Because this girl is a screamer.”
Karen:  “I like to think of it as being expressive, not loud.”
Jack:  “Whatever you call it it can wake the dead!”
Karen:  “You do pretty good yourself, mister.  When we want to terrorize the neighbors we both get out our Magic Wands, plug them in and go at it side by side.  And I always get off first.”
Jack:  “Never take a plug in toy like this near water.”
Karen:  “Oh and here’s a tip.  You can turn any un-vibrating dildo or insertable into a vibrating one by just bringing the Hitachi in contact with it.  It’s like totally fantastic.”
Jack:  “Since we use the Wand for only external use, we don’t use lube with it.  We mistakenly did it once and it was a bitch to clean up and it makes the handle too freakin slippery.
Karen:  “If you’ve never tried one of these thing, you absolutely need to get one.  It makes the ideal gift for just about anyone.  Because you can use it very effectively on sore muscles.”

Next we have exquisite insertable erotic art from the artisans at XHale Glass.  This is the second product we’ve reviewed from this outstanding company.  Look for the  Smooth Glider review.

The Heartbreaker ——  $189.99

Kevin & Gina
Kevin:  “What we saw first was this thick black velvet drawstring pouch.  It is stately enough to carry the crown jewels.”
Gina:  “And when we opened the pouch we saw the most magnificent textured glass insertable our eyes have ever seen.  It is absolutely stunning.  It stands 7” tall with a 1” diameter shaft.  The tapered realistic looking head is only slightly larger.  If that were all that was too it, it would be grand, but there’s more.  The textures on the shaftx351 are heart-shaped and, depending on the light look ruby red or a deep purple.  These hearts are actually 24K gold.  Can you believe that?  No wonder it comes nestled in its thick protective pouch.”
Kevin:  “Before we dared use The Heartbreaker we set it on a little pedestal in front of the hearth and watched the flames in the fireplace behind it dance through the glass.  It was so fuckin trippy!”
Gina:  “I broke the spell by suggesting we take The Heartbreaker to bed.  Kevin couldn’t resist the offer so we tossed a coin to see who would get first crack at it.”
Kevin:  “Gina always wins these coin tosses; I don’t even know why we continue to go through the motions.  At any rate, while she got ready in the bathroom I busied myself with getting two bowels of water ready; one with ice, the other hot water.  Once Gina was ready, I blindfolded her with a silk scarf.  I began kissing her all over, biting her nipples, eatin her cunt.  Once she was wet I dipped The Heartbreaker into the ice water and touched it to her pussy lips.”
Gina:  “I thought I was going to go through the ceiling.  The cold hardness took my breath away.  Kevin fucked me with The Heartbreaker while he masturbated.  I still was blindfolded but I could tell what he was doing by his rocking motion.”
Kevin:  “After Gina came a couple of times, I tried the hot water treatment.  This wasn’t as startling as the cold, but it worked its magic too.”
Gina:  “Once I had had my fill it was Kevin’s turn.  He hadn’t cum yet, so he was totally primed for my assault with The Heartbreaker.  I wiped down the toy with one of our toy wipes (it can also be sterilized) and slipped The Heartbreaker into my strap-on harness.  The glass dildo has a nice base on it that makes it perfect for use with a harness.”
Kevin:  “Gina lubed my ass with our favorite silicone lube; put a drop or two on The Heartbreaker; and before I could say ‘bugger’, she was in me.  The dildo’s head hit my prostate with a bang.  The slightly curved and textured shaft added the perfect sensations to my ass lips.  I was leaking precum like a faucet.”
Gina:  “I wouldn’t let him masturbate, but would rub his penis with my hand as I pegged him.  He begged for release.”
Kevin:  “She has a fuckin sadistic streak a mile long.”
Gina:  “When I finally got him off with my hand The Heartbreaker was deep inside him.  He came with such force I practically got knocked over.”
Kevin:  “Can you tell we LOVE The Heartbreaker?
Gina:  “If you are unsure about glass toys, all you have to remember is:  buy quality!   I don’t think you’ll find a better manufacturer than XHale Glass.  The Heartbreaker is just one of their brilliant collection.  But this work of art must be treated with the care it deserves.  After all this is pretty pricey stuff.”
Kevin:  “Yes, but it will last a lifetime. Think of it as an investment in art as well as pleasure.”

ENJOY

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VAROOM!

Caution:  Amazing Sensations Ahead!

That’s right, sex fans, we have ourselves 4 fantastic and unique vibrators for review this week.  And the Dr Dick Review Crew proclaims each one a winner.  That’s amazing; when was the last time we could say that?

Ok, let’s get the ball rolling.  We’ll be hearing from Review Crew members — Jack, Denise, Jada and yours truly, Dr Dick.

We begin today with a delightful prostate vibe, which comes to us from our friends (and neighbors in BC Canada) at Trinity Romance.  Jack spills the beans.

Element ——  $64.99

Jack:
Since I’ve started to show an interest in my ass as a reservoir of amazing sexual pleasure, I’ve become increasingly focused on finding just the right toy for my butt play.  My partner, Karen, has loads of vibrating massagers, but none of them really interest me as an insertable.  They are fine for external stimulation, but I’ve been on the lookout for something I can call my own and that I can safely stuff in my ass.

Because I’m so new to this sort of play, I have some very specific requirements for the toy of my prostate-massaging dreams.  It has to be modestly sized, manly looking, something more plug-like then just a dildo and it has to vibrate.  Is that too much to ask?

So along comes the opportunity to test drive Element, a prostate massager from one of the most The Elementtrusted names in sex toys, Tantus.  Curiously enough, I’ve seen pictures of this toy online.  And ya know what, I passed it up thinking it couldn’t possibly be the toy I was looking for.  For some reason, the photos I’ve seen of it make it look more menacing than it is.  Once I had it in my hands, however, I realized this might very well be what I’ve been searching for.

It’s not nearly as big as I imagined it would be from the pictures I saw.  It’s 100% silicone, which makes it soft and pliable.  It’s got a manly enough shape; it’s more of a plug, then it is a dildo.  And it sure enough vibrates.  So check, check, check and check!

Karen said she thought Element would be as an effective G-spot vibe as it is a P-spot vibe.  I suppose she’s right.  But for now, this baby is all mine.

I greased up Element and my near-virginal pucker with a wad of water-based lube.  (That’s the only kind of lube you can use with this, or any, silicone toy.  But you know that already, huh?)  I gingerly slipped the bulbous head into my ass.  Pretty easy going!  I stop to take some deep breaths, because Element is already working its magic.  The shaft is easy to insert too.  I’m kinda surprised.  Not that it’s particularly thick; it’s just that it’s easy. Element comes to rest with the base tight against my cheeks.  I’m lovin this big time, and I have yet to activate the vibe.

I wait a moment to let my hole adjust to its new friend.  Then I switch on the bullet vibe that is embedded in the toy’s base.  Wow, that’s nice!  It’s  not overpowering or anything, just a nice buzz.  My prostate is jumpin’ for joy though.  My dick is rock hard and drizzlin’ precum like crazy.  I jack myself to nearly cuming then let go of my cock.  I love this edge play; I can do this for a half hour easy. Element is amazingly comfortable in my ass.  I would have never guessed had I not tried it myself.

I finally pop my joy-juice all over my chest.  There’s more spunk then I usually produce.  I’m chalking that up to the prostate massage.  I love my Element!

If you’re a novice ass-diddler like me, and you think, like I thought, that this couldn’t be the ass toy you’ve been looking for; think again.  It’s only 4.5″ x 1″ for chrissake.  The bullet vibe runs on 3 watch batteries (LR44’s) and the first set is included in the package.  THANK YOU Tantus!

Because Element is 100% silicone clean up is easy with soap and water.  To sterilize, remove the bullet vibe, and drop it into a pot of boiling water for a minute or two.  Or you can just pop it in the dishwasher before you drift off for a well-deserved post-buggering nap.

Here’s a tip:  I couldn’t figure out how to remove the freakin bullet vibe.  The thing was stuck in the base of the toy like it was glued in there.  Dr Dick told me the secret of removing it.  Add a few drops of water-based lube between the vibe and the hole it’s in.  Work it around a little; apply pressure to the base of the toy above the vibe and PRESTO!  The vibe pops out.

Element is not only a toy, but it’s also a means to prostate health.  Be sure to check it out.  I encourage you put one where the sun don’t shine.  You’ll thank me!

Up next; yet another Big Teaze treasure!  Jada will introduce you to this beauty.

Onyé —— $55.00

Jada:
I’m delighted to have this beautiful vibe to share with you.  It’s one of the Big Teaze elegant B-3 line called, Onyé!  I don’t know how to pronounce that, nor do I know what the word means.  But they could have called it anything and it would still be the very stylish discreet vibe it is.419W+DHfGaL._SS500_

Onyé has eight separate massage modes (3 speeds and 5 pulse patterns).  This little powerhouse is packed into a 4.5″ x 1.25” bullet made of gleaming black virgin ABS with a tasteful silicone band.  The non-slip grip silicone band is perfect for keeping lubed fingers from slipping.  All of this comes in sophisticated packaging including a satin-lined storage and brochure.  You can tell that a lot of thought went into this presentation.

It’s splash proof, not waterproof.  I wouldn’t use it in the bath, but it was fine in the shower.

The battery compartment is easy to open; thank you very much!  It runs on 3-AAA batteries (not included in the package).  Figuring out how the batteries are to be placed in the compartment was a bit of a puzzle till I noticed the tiny-tiny diagrams on the side of the compartment.  I really needed my reading glasses for that.

There is just the one button operation on the base of the vibe, which means you have to cycle through all of the modes to locate the sensation best suited to your mood, or to turn it off.  That might be aggravating to some, but it wasn’t an issue for me necessarily.

Onyé is not the most powerful vibe I own, but I don’t expect that in such a petite package.  It is, however, a go anywhere vibe that slips easily into my purse.  One never knows when one’s going to need a little…how should I say this; boost during the day.

This massager is not super quiet as are some of my silicone vibes.  But the hard plastic shell delivers more of the vibration then does the silicone vibes do.  Oddly enough, silicone seems to cushion the vibration.

I’m happy to recommend this beautiful toy as a gift to yourself or someone special.

Now we have two vibes from a top of the line toy manufacturer, Vibratex.  They  are industry pioneers who bring a distinctive Japanese aesthetic to the marketplace.  Denise starts us off with a cordless waterproof vibe.

Vibratex Mystic Wand —— $71.32

Denise
I keep saying; my Hitachi Magic Wand is my all time favorite toy!  I ain’t about to give it up for nobody.  You’ll have to pry it out of my cold dead hands. Got it?  OK!

That being said, I have just discovered what I believe is the next best thing to my beloved Magic Wand.  I present you with the Mystic Wand.  It is the petite, cordless, waterproof sibling of the Magic Wand.  And it shakes my word just like its bigger, older sister.  It makes a perfect bath companion or a travel companion.  It even comes with a sweet little storage bag.Sex_Toys_VMYST

It should come as no surprise to any of us that Vibratex is also responsible for introducing the Hitachi Magic Wand to the American market over twenty years ago.  So hurray for that!

Mystic Wand uses of 4-AA batteries (not included in the package).  The battery compartment is easy to open, but battery placement is very difficult to figure out.  Only after I struggled with this puzzle for like 10 minutes, did I notice that there are minuscule images on the compartment that direct the user to the proper battery placement.

Like my trusty Magic Wand, this sweetheart of a vibe delivers amazing external stimulation.  I’m not all that found of insertable vibes, so Mystic Wand is perfect for me.  I love the ridges on its bulbous silicone head.  A little water-based lube to get things started and before you can say; “whoa nelly!’ I’m on my way to big O-town.

The Mystic Wand features six vibe modes, each one more delicious then the previous one.  And here’s something I really like; it has a separate on/off switch.  I hate having to cycle through a whole set of functions just to turn the blasted thing off.  Oh, and it’s surprisingly quiet; another big plus in my book.

The handle or base of the Mystic Wand is soft and silky.  Is that silicone too?  I wonder.  Whatever it is, it is ideal material to use on the handle.  It helps maintain a grip even with lubed fingers.

Silicone is hypoallergenic and non-porous. Clean up is super easy; wash with warm soapy water and dry thoroughly with a soft cloth and you’re done. You can wipe it down with a lint-free towel moistened with peroxide, rubbing alcohol or a 10% bleach solution too.

There is absolutely nothing I don’t like about this wonder; it gets my highest rating.  And for the modest retail price you get a very remarkable vibe indeed.

Finally, yours truly presents the other Vibratex vibe.

Pandora Vibrating Silicone Prostate Massager  ——  $39.00

Dr Dick
I’d like to introduce you to a handy little vibrating plug that’ll surely put a smile on your face.  This unisex toy will jazz up whatever spot you got — G-spot or P-spot.  Since I’m a proud owner of a P-spot (prostate), I’ll do my testifyin’ from that particular pew.  I’ll let all you G-spot owners come to your own conclusions.

This here Pandora massager is the perfect utensil for the novice butt pirate.  Not overly familiar with things pokin’ you in the be-hind?  Not to worry, this smooth ergonomic slim-jim will enter with ease.  Guys who are used to having big toys in their hole will probably be unimpressed with this beginner’s model, but the rest of us will appreciate its modest size.C554

But hold on there, maybe you don’t know a butt plug from a hole in your head.  Okey dokey, here’s the 411 on these puppies.  Plugs are different from most dildos and other anal toys.  They’re shorter and have a unique shape.  The insertable part is tapered, designed for easy insertion and comfort while you got it in ya.

The plug tapers more dramatically near the base into a notch.  This allows your sphincter muscle to close down on the plug keeping it firmly in place.  Finally the flared base keeps it from slipping inside your bum.  Pretty gal-darn clever, huh?

Anyhow, Pandora has everything you’d expect in a plug.  Plus it has this swell hooked end that is designed to hit the spot, if ya catch my drift.  And there’s a bonus; it vibrates too.  Not all butt plugs do, ya know.  There are seven, count them, seven different speeds and pulsations, which makes that little soft hooked end thingy do a happy dance on your P-spot.  And boy if that don’t make you see the light, nothin’ will.

There is nothing overpowering about this little bugger.  Its vibration/pulsation is sweet and gentle, just the thing for the anal-lovin’ trainee.  I encourage you to take your time getting to know all the different speeds and pulsations.  I allowed the Zen like vibrations to build as I moved through the different sensations. And it was so much better than just throwin’ it into high gear from the get-go.  Vibration control is found at the base of the unit.

The quality wireless Japanese motor is super quiet.  It runs on 3 of them flat watch batteries.  But don’t worry; your first rides are free.  This puppy is already loaded with batteries and is ready to get at ya right out of the package.

And here’s a tip.  Once you get used to having this discreet pleasure puppy in your bum, you can just leave it there for an extended time.  That’s the beauty part of a plug’s flared end.  You’ll never have to worry that it will go missing up inside.  Imagine how this little number will make you feel as you wisk your way through all your humdrum household tasks.  And you can bank on that!

ENJOY

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3 Hits and A Miss

We’re back with a slew of new reviews.  The intrepid Dr Dick’s Review Crew tackles a mixed bag of treats.

Today we will hear from Review Crew Members: Jada, Ken & Denise, Kevin and Jack & Karen.  So without further ado…

We begin with a couple of new offerings from that gargantuan adult toy company, Doc Johnson.  Here’s Jada to tell us about the first one.

Doc Johnson i-Vibe Rabbit Vibrator —— $36.30

Jada
The very first vibe I ever owned was a rabbit vibrator.  I got off on it in record time, every time.  But it was such a wild looking contraption I never really warmed up to it.

Aesthetically speaking, there’s something about the “rabbit” doohickey that juts out from the vibe’s shaft that I find disturbing.  Don’t get me wrong; I understand the reason it is there.  For most women, clitoral stimulation is what gets us off.  I’m guessing that the 350__1_ivibe-rabbit-vibrator-grape.jpginsertable shaft, which is, strangely enough, usually penis shaped, is a way we tip our hat to the male member, even though most of our vibrator use is by ourselves.  Frankly, I’ve never really understood that.  I just don’t know too many women who need a penis reminder when we’re masturbating.

This suggests to me that these designs originate in the male mind.  I wish there was a way I could substantiate this.

Ok, so from the aesthetics point of view the i-Vibe Rabbit Vibrator doesn’t do a thing for me.  But I won’t detract points on that account either.  I review the toy on its merits.

Speaking of aesthetics; what I do like about this toy is its packaging.  It’s a plastic clamshell that slips inside a frosted oval plastic sheath.  It’s a very nice presentation that I find very attractive.

The i-Vibe Rabbit uses 4-AA batteries and they are not included in the package.  DISAPPOINTED!  The battery compartment is easy to use and it seals shut making the toy waterproof.  That’s a big plus in my book.

The keypad controls are pretty intuitive, although I think they should be in the reverse position.  Like I said, most women use a vibrator on themselves.  Looking down on the keypad, while using it on myself I see the controls upside down.

There are two main utilities — clitoral tickler (the rabbit) and shaft vibration (which doesn’t really vibrate, rather it rotates the beads in the shaft as well as the penis shaped head).  There are different speeds and three functions.  Frankly, I think all this is overkill.

It’s a bit noisier than I like, but with everything that’s going on with the i-Vibe Rabbit that’s not all that surprising.  Despite all the functions and speeds, this thing never really delivers the kind of vibration I want and need.  I was able to get off on it, but it wasn’t as effortless as I had hoped.

All the functions and speed variations run down the batteries very quickly, which seemed wasteful.  I would have preferred the toy do one thing really well and have the batteries last longer.  But, in the end, none of this mattered at all, because after installing the second set of batteries (brand new fresh ones, I might add) the unit simply stopped working.  That’s right, within a week of getting the blasted thing; it was in the trash.  DIASPPOINTED!  I would have been furious had I paid good money for this.

Come on, Doc Johnson, you should be able to do much better than this!

Next, Kevin introduces us to the other Doc Johnson product.

Doc Johnson Harmony Divine Yin —— $49.99

Kevin
I’m happy to report that I had better luck with my toy then Jada did.

This here is the  Harmony Divine Yin (black), which is exactly like the Yang (white), except for the color.  It is a multi-speed (3), waterproof vibe with a very stylish shape.  Despite having an interesting shape, there is nothing about it that suggests craftsmanship.  You can tell immediately that it is mass-produced.  There is also a disposable quality about it, which is too bad.  Because with a little more though behind this, the  Harmony Divine Yin could have been something quite remarkable.Sex_Toys_DJ091511

It is made of hard plastic.  I didn’t think I was going to take to the hardness, but I wound up liking it very much.  So I have no quarrel with the material used.

The batteries (2-AAA) are easy to install.  No batteries are included in the package, which sucks.  And the battery compartment is easily closed to create what they claim is a watertight fit.  I use it in the shower, but I won’t use it in the bath. I’d just as soon not ruin this by tempting the fates, if ya know what I mean.

Harmony Divine Yin is not very powerful, but I won’t kick it out of bed.  The nipple-like button turns it on and cycles through the three speeds. The hard plastic conducts the vibration better than say a jelly toy would; so there’s that.  It’s pretty quiet too.

The serious end of  Harmony Divine Yin is sort of plug-shaped and is nearly 2 inches in diameter at its widest part.  In terms of this being used as a butt plug or a prostate stimulator, it isn’t for the novice butt pirate.  However, it’s a nice external stimulator for your taint (perineum) and balls.  Because it’s hard plastic, you can sit on it with the pointy end on your rosebud while you whack off.  It gives you a nice little buzz.  If you’re gonna use it internally; lube is a necessity.  Again, because it’s hard plastic, you can use whatever kind of lube you want.  This will make the tapered end easier to insert.  Not that it’s particularly difficult for those of us who know what we’re doing.

I liked doing my kegel exercises on the  Harmony Divine Yin unyielding hardness.  If you’re up for it, the ridges in the middle of the toy will provide some extra stimulation during a thrusting motion. Once it’s inserted, it can be pretty much a hands-free toy.

Clean up is super easy with mild soap and warm water. You can also wipe it down with a lint-free towel moistened with peroxide, rubbing alcohol or a 10% bleach solution too.

One final thing, I think this is a bit pricey for a simple straightforward hard plastic vibe, especially since it’s not all that powerful.  If it were $10 less, I’d say go for it; what do you have to lose?  But for just about $10 more you’d be able get yourself a very nice, powerful silicone vibe that will probably last much longer than the Harmony Divine Yin will.

Jack & Karen tell us about a new Tristan Taormino video.

The Expert Guide to Anal Sex ——  $29.95

Jack & Karen
Jack:  “So ya’ll know I’m real new at the whole butt sex thing, right?  I’m still discovering the pleasures that lie within.”
Karen:  “I’ve been dying to strap on one and give this boy a pegging he will not forget.”
Jack:  “It’s talk like that that give me pause.”
Karen:  “Sorry, honey, I was just making a little joke.”DVDVIVID1277
Jack:  “What my foray into anal sex has done for me is give me a greater sensitivity toward women and the invasive sex they have all the time.  I mean, if someone were to fuck me in the ass like I have fucked some women in the pussy, without even so much as a warm-up, I’d fuckin kill them.”
Karen:  “That is an awakening that I wish all men would come to sooner rather than later.”
Jack:  “Anyhow, not to veer too far off topic; I was glad we got this DVD to review.  It really opened my eyes to the pleasures to be had in butt fucking.”
Karen:  “This is a terrific resource for the novice as well as the proficient alan sex practitioners.  International sex expert, Tristan Taormino, talks to a group of (straight) couples about anal anatomy, as well as delvers tips, and techniques of anal pleasure. Her co-hosts, Lorelei and Ariel, demonstrate various techniques as Tristan narrates what they are doing.  There’s even a Q&A period.”
Jack:  “It is both super arousing and very informative.  This is a co-production with one of porn’s biggest companies, Vivid.  So you know it’s gonna be hot.  Unfortunately, and this is a huge disappointment for me; it’s only about women receiving anal.  What, they couldn’t have included some men on the receiving end?  Bummer.”
Karen:  “That is so true!  But that doesn’t diminish the information imparted.  For example, Tristan talks about lubes and desensitizing agents; and that’s applicable to both women and men.”
Jack:  “You get comments from Tristan as well as pop-up tips about the action throughout the feature.  I also liked the way the performers talked about anal sex and why they like it.  This goes a long way in helping demystify what is often a taboo subject for most couples.”
Karen:  “I like how toys, particularly plugs were used as a warm-up to cock penetration.  I know from my own experiences with anal sex that foreplay is essential.”
Jack:  “I was also kind of surprised that there was little mention of the increased risks of sexually transmitted diseases with anal sex.  NO CONDOMS WERE USED IN THIS MOVIE!  What’s up with that?  Maybe they didn’t want to scare people who may be considering including anal in their monogamous couple sex.  There is a safer sex mini-feature included on the DVD, but I thought there could have been more in the feature itself.”
Karen:  “There’s also a featurette on anal hygiene, which I found informative.”
Jack:  “I really got off on the hot, hot, hot girl-on-girl bonus scene.  Finally a little strap-on action!”
Karen:  “We recommend this DVD as a good place to start for women considering anal sex.  Guys who are interested in exploring their bottom need to look elsewhere.”

Finally, let’s have a little fun with Ken & Denise and their parlor game.  (This is a Good Vibrations Brand Ambassador review.)

Truth or Dare: A Game of Passion ——  $16.95

Ken & Denise
Denise:  “I love games, all kinds of games.  I guess I’m just a party girl at heart.”
Ken:  “I, on the other hand, think most games, especially parlor games are boring.”
Denise:  “Yeah, but this one is different, because it’s like a sex game.”
Ken:  “So we had two of our favorite couples over for dinner last week.  We were all sufficiently socially lubricated, if ya catch my drift.  We plunked ourselves down in front of the fire for a little postprandial toke, when little Mary sunshine over here hauls out the Truth or Dare game!”
Denise:  “What a better time for a little fun?”NAUGHTY_MTL_Truth_Or_Dare2
Ken:  “I’m thinkin’ ‘oh god, do we have to?’  But our friends who are green with envy over our gig on Dr Dick’s Review Crew were like, ‘cool, let’s do this!’”
Denise:  “Luckily, considering the condition we were all in, the game is super simple.  There’s one die that you roll and two stacks of cards — one marked Truth, the other marked Dare.”
Ken:  “The die has Truth or Dare on six of the eight sides.  The other two sides have the word ‘Wild’ on it.  If you roll that, you get to choose either a Truth or Dare card.  Then you can either do the thing yourself or order your partner to perform the task, or you can pass.”
Denise:  “We all got increasingly silly as the game wore on.  If you choose a Truth card, it may read, ‘If you could watch an intimate moment from your partner’s life before you met, what would that be?’ ‘Would you ever buy a private lap dance for your partner?’  ‘What authority figure possesses the most erotic possibilities for you?’  ‘What sensual characteristic or ability do you envy in the opposite sex?’”
Ken:  “The Dare” cards are equally innocuous; however, they often involve props — computers, whipped cream, makeup, etc.  ‘You are the subject of an impromptu erotic photo shoot.  You partner will be the photographer…’  ‘Perform a seductive and enticing striptease to the music of your choice.’ ‘Create a bondage costume using nothing but plastic wrap!’  You get the idea.”
Denise:  “Some of the Dare cards involve calling other people on the phone to ask dumb questions.  This is never a good idea, especially when the person you’re calling isn’t as loaded as you are.  But we just disregarded those commands, and we had a ball.”
Ken:  “I think our friends were a bit intimidated by some of the tasks.  They’re not as big a freaks as us.  But it’s true; fun was had by all.”
Denise:  “Good point!  Before you consider playing this game with anyone other than your significant other, review the cards to see if it’s actually a good idea for the company you have in mind.

ENJOY

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A little dab’ll do ya!

Sex fans, we have a load of lovely lubes to tell you about.  We received five of the hottest selling Boy Butter products to test, and test we did!  In fact, The Dr Dick Review Crew has pert near wore out their parts testing this stuff.  What we won’t do in the name of science.

Review Crew members; Mick & Chuck, Kevin & Gina, Jack & Karen and Carlos walk us around these products.

Boy Butter Warming 5 oz EZ-Pump —— $20.99

Gina & Kevin
Gina: “We’ve both been wanting to try a warming lube, so I’m glad we were chosen for Boy Butter Warming .”
Kevin: “I like the pump container. It’s easy to use and there’s not the mess that often comes with traditional containers.”BBwarming
Gina: “This stuff really works! With just the first application I could feel the warming sensations. At first, I thought it was going to get too intense for me, but it didn’t.”
Kevin: “It’s a coconut-oil based lube so it’s not compatible with latex condoms. That’s not an issue for us, but I did want to mention that in my review. Also, this is the first creamy lube we’ve used. I was impressed with its lasting power.”
Gina: “I must confess; I had my misgivings at first. I have very sensitive skin and I often have adverse reactions to new lubes. I checked the label on Boy Butter Warming and secretly thought to myself, I can’t even pronounce half of the ingredients. This doesn’t bode well for me using it. At least, that’s what I thought. Curiously enough, I experienced no irritation or discomfort. So yeah for that!”
Kevin: “We love our silicone lubes, but they are a bitch to clean up and they stain clothing. This product however, despite containing silicone and being oil-based, cleaned up in a snap. In fact, it cleaned up like a water-based lube.

Boy Butter 5 oz EZ-Pump —— $16.99

Carlos
This is the original formula Boy Butter.  It comes in several different packaging options, so you may have seen it in a tub or a squeeze bottle.  Personally, I think this E-Z pump is the best.  It’s easy to handle, and you can dispense just the right amount of lube you need every time.  The plastic top keeps it from accidentally messing up anything else it may come in contact with.BBoriginal

I really like the creamy consistency of Boy Butter.  It lasts longer than other oil-based lubes I’ve tried; and I’ve tried plenty.  The organic coconut-oil base keeps it slick and silky.  I’ve never found a better jack-off lube than Boy Butter.  It even outlasts my favorite silicone-based lube.  I’m sold on this product.

Keep in mind; you can’t use Boy Butter with latex condoms.

Clean up is pretty easy too, soap and warm water will do.  It’s so much easier to clean up than my favorite silicone-based lube.

The only drawback that I can see is it doesn’t taste very nice.  But then again, I’m just jacking off with it.  If I planned to go down on someone, I think I would choose a different lube.

Boy Butter H2O 5 oz EZ-Pump —— $16.99

Jack & Karen
Jack:  “Damn, this stuff is great!”BBLh2o
Karen:  “This is the first creamy formula water-based lube I’ve eve seen.  I didn’t even know you could make such a thing.”
Jack:  “We concur with all our fellow reviewers, Boy Butter H2O last long, never gets sticky.  We really like the pump container too.  Very convenient!”
Karen:  “This formula is perfect for use with latex condoms.  And because it is water-based, clean up is a breeze.  It won’t stain clothing or beading either.  And that’s a big plus in my book.”
Jack:  “Neither one of us experienced any negative reactions to this lube; no irritation, nothing.  And we used it for fucking, not just for jillin’ or jackin’ off.
Karen:  “Yeah, I was really surprised by this.  I’m always very careful about what I put near, on or in my pussy.  But knock on wood, I’ve had no adverse reaction at all.”
Jack:  “Kudos for great packaging and branding.  It’s fun and smart.  Funny, up until we got Boy Butter H2O to review, I had never heard of the company.  I wonder, is it a product line that is primarily marketed to gay men?
Karen:  “If it is, that would be really too bad.  Because other straight and bi folks, like us, would really enjoy Boy Butter H2O too.
Jack:  “Get some today; you won’t be sorry!

Boy Butter Extreme 5 oz. E-Z Pump —— $17.99

Boy Butter Extreme Desensitizing H20 Based 5 oz EZ-Pump —— $19.25

Mick & ChuckBBextremeEZ
Mick:  “We have a little confession to make.  Chuck and I had already used Boy Butter Extreme before we were asked to review it.”
Chuck:  “We hadn’t used the H20 Based formula and we really wanted to, so we asked if we could test both products.”
Mick:  “Until we tried the H20 Based one, we thought Boy Butter Extreme was the best such product on the market.  We’ve tired several other desensitizing products, but we liked Boy Butter Extreme best.”
Chuck:  “Sometimes Mick has difficulty relaxing into butt sex.  I’m not tooting my own horn here, but I’m hung 8.5”, pretty thick too.”
Mick:  “Trust me, it’s a sight to behold.  But it’s true; I have a tendency to tighten up when I’m just getting started in a fuck. Boy Butter Extreme helps me over this initial phase allows me to enjoy all that is to come.”
Chuck:  “I love the pump container.  Both products are long-lasting and remain slick and silky, which makes fucking a joy.  I hate it when lubes get sticky!”
Mick:  “Both products use the maximum amount of Benzocaine (7.5%) allowed by law.  So you know this is industrial strength!”BBextremeH2O
Chuck:  “Some people have an adverse reaction to Benzocaine.  If you do, these are not the products for you.”
Mick:  “I am so happy that Boy Butter make a H20 formula, because Chuck has to use a condom when I use either of these products. And the H20 Based version is condom safe.”
Chuck:  “I was just about to mention that.  We had an unfortunate experience a while back when we first started using desensitizing lubes and whatnot.  I didn’t wear a condom and my dick became desensitized too.”
Mick:  “Come to think of it, this wouldn’t be such a bad thing for a guy who has a real short fuse, right?  The Benzocaine would probably just the thing to help him last longer.”
Chuck:  “Oh, and may I suggest that you use these products sparingly.  A little goes a very long way.  You certainly don’t want to over use either of these lubes.  It will take all the fun out of the fuck for both top and bottom; you’ll not be able to feel a thing.”
Mick:  “Exactly, ya simply want to apply a small amount of Boy Butter Extreme (or the H20 Based formula) to your finger, insert it into your ass.  Smooth it around till you’ve lightly coated your sphincter.  You will notice the numbing effect in a minute or two.  Remember, you can always add more if needed, but you can’t eliminate it once it’s been applied.  At least, not without soap and water.”
Chuck:  “We highly recommend these products with the precautions we mention.”
Mick:  “If you’ve shied away from anal sex simply because of the initial discomfort, give one or another of these Boy Butter Extreme products a try.  I think you will be pleasantly surprised.”

ENJOY

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Two Cute!

We have two more vibes from Synergy Erotic to tell you about.

We’ve reviewed a slew of their products since the beginning of the year.  Today we take a look at The Plasma Illuminate-Her Strobing Uber Balls and The Elite Silicone Wave.

Jack and Karen do the honors.

The Plasma Illuminate-Her Strobing Uber Balls $21.23

Jack & Karen
Karen:  “When last we had an opportunity to review some Synergy Erotic toys, we didn’t have such a good time.”Jack:  “You can say that again!”Karen:  “Happily, today is different.  While neither of these toys will rank among our favorites of the year they were fun novelties, for sure.”Jack:  “First off we have The Plasma Illuminate-Her Strobing Uber Balls.  That’s a mouthful, huh?  What we have here is three hot pink plastic balls, about 3/4” in diameter attached to one another by a power cord that attaches to a pink power pack.  Got that?  Each ball contains a high-speed micro motor capable of spinning at thousands of RPM’s, which generates a high-frequency vibration.  The balls also contain a multi-color LED that flash in time with the vibration.  Can ya stand it?”Karen:  “I know, I was like mesmerized once the The Plasma Illuminate-Her got going.  Who thought of something like this, I wonder?Not to get ahead of myself here, I installed 3 AAA batteries in the power pack (I had to use my own, because no batteries were included in the package). The power pack has an on/off button as well as an up button and a down button.  It has 7 various speeds”Jack:  “The balls are waterproof and are meant, I suppose, to be inserted in one’s pussy or ass.  Please note:  the power pack is not waterproof!”Karen:  “When cranked up to the highest level the ball are in a frenetic state.  They’re buzzin’ and flashin’, like nobody’s business.  Laying the balls astride my genitals — one at my taint, one at vagina and one on my clit blew me away.  When Jack got on top of me and ground his dick on top of the balls pushing them deeper into my skin I came in a minute.”Jack:  “The vibration felt great on my dick too.”Karen:  “I tried the The Plasma Illuminate-Her inside me too, but that wasn’t all that terrific.  Either the balls weren’t big enough or my vaginal walls are way too padded.  The vibration just got lost.”Jack:  “Karen’s got the deepest and most cavernous pussy I ever did see.  It’s no wonder these little balls got lost in there.”Karen:  “Aaaa, thanks, I guess!  That was a compliment, wasn’t it?”Jack:  “Yes, dear; a big, fat, sweet, juicy compliment, just like your pussy.”Karen:  “I got off real good with The Plasma Illuminate-Her Strobing Uber Balls, you probably will too.”

Silicone Elite Wave $28.05
Jack:  “Next up is the Silicone Elite Wave.  This is a slim, stylishly designed — wavy — vibe that has 5 vibrating/pulsating functions.”
Karen:  “There’s a one-button control on the base of the vibe that turns the thing on and off as well as rotates through the pulsating functions.  I’m not a big fan of a one-button controller, but that’s just me.  The package claims the vibe is made of silicone, but one has to wonder what grade of silicone can be had for the price of this vibe?”9972-72
Jack:  “That’s true enough, but I’d rather have silicone of any grade than have something with a lot of Phthalate in it.  Wouldn’t you agree?”
Karen:  “I would agree.  And thank you for stating that.
I unscrewed the base of the vibe, installed 2 AAA batteries in the shaft (I had to use my own, because no batteries were included in the package). And switched it on.  It’s very quiet with surprisingly strong vibration for a little fella.”
Jack:  “Karen got to use it first on her own.  When we used it together, it was very effective.  Since it doesn’t have that traditional cock shape it will please more men when using it with their partner.  It’s also less obtrusive than a larger vibe.  And like Karen said, it has a nice punch to it, despite its size.”
Karen:  “My private play was wonderful.  The soft tip of the vibe was perfect for stimulating between my vaginal lips.  And it nuzzled my clit nicely too.”
Jack:  “I got to use the Silicone Elite Wave on my own too.  Since it’s waterproof, I took it in the shower with me.  I love squeezing one off in the shower, don’t you?  The vibe slipped up my ass so easily, just like when I finger myself when I’m yankin’ on my joint.  And I can tell you; even though this vibe isn’t much thicker than my finger, it does a much better job stimulating my prostate.”
Karen:  “Because we shared this toy, I’m grateful that it’s so easy to clean and disinfect.  Warm water and soap to clean, a 10% bleach solution to disinfect.”
Jack:  “I was all jazzed up about the Silicone Elite Wave, thinking I had found a mini treasure, when it was time to change out the batteries.  Apparently Karen and I ran the toy down in record time.  At any rate, I removed the base cap and discovered to my great disappointment that the batteries were stuck in the shaft.  Dislodging the batteries meant that the thin copper wires on either side of the cylinder came out with the batteries.  DISAPPOINTED!”
Karen:  “I’ll say!  We were both thinking, WTF?   As it turned out, our little vibe was a one shot wonder.  We never got it to work again after removing the first set of batteries.”
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Mixed Bag

Today we have several more products from Synergy Erotic.  We reviewed a bunch of their products back in January — Vibe-Me Massager, Squirmy Touch-Me and Luscious Thrill-Her

This week’s Review Crew:  Jack & Karen, Angie and Joy & Dixie

Angie has a bunny vibe to show us.
Elite Silicone Supple Bunny Lavender $54.45

Angie

There are a lot of things I really like about this 8 1/2 inch silicone bunny vibe.  First and foremost, it’s silicone.  Second, it’s waterproof.  It’s modestly priced and it is attractive.

When I shop for a vibe for myself, I pretty much always choose silicone.  And since I more often than not use the vibe in the tub, waterproof is at the top of my list of “must-haves”.

Bath time is my private time.  And as often as possible I leisurely soak away the day’s tensions while my husband is busy preparing dinner in the kitchen.  I know, I am so lucky and he’s such a treasure.  I help myself to a glass of wine, fill the tub with a bubble bath and climb in.  It is about the most hedonistic think I can think of, but it also keeps me sane.

The Elite Silicone Supple Bunny has an easy to use Polyurethane coated control unit in the handle.  Even in a bubble bath it is easy to manipulate.  That’s a big plus in my book.  Who wants to struggle with slippery controls when things are just getting interesting just below the surface of the water.

It has a 2-speed vibrating bunny tickler that really delivers a substantial sustained vibration.  This is by far the best part of the toy.   There is also something that rotates clockwise and counter-clockwise beneath the silicone skin on the shaft.  The head of the toy rotates slightly too, but these sensations are very subtle.  Unfortunately, way too subtle for me.  It’s the bunny tickler that is this device’s best stimulation feature.

Like all medical-grade silicone, it is hypoallergenic skin and phthalate free!   It requires 4 AAA batteries.  Sadly, batteries are not included, but at least the package is clearly marked with the battery size needed.

I recommend the Elite Silicone Supple Bunny.

Jack and Karen have a couple of vibes to report on.
Perfect Touch Satisfy-Her, Luster Black $19.99

Jack & Karen
Karen:  “I love the design of the Perfect Touch Satisfy-Her.  It’s shiny, it’s sleek, and I even liked the hard plastic.  Sometimes I’m in the mood for something hard, if ya know what I mean.  Unfortunately, I can’t say much for its performance.”
Jack:  “It’s waterproof; you got to give it that.”
Karen:  “Yes, that’s what it says.  It’s also supposed to have a 5-speed vibrator that is controlled by a single button in the handle.  I installed 2 AAA batteries (I had to use my own, because no batteries were included in the package).
Nothing I did make the vibe go through its paces.  Pushing the button once got it going all right; nice vibration too.  Pushing it again stopped the blasted thing.  Pushing it a third time started it up again, but I couldn’t tell if it had changed speeds.  I kept pushing the button never getting the same results twice.  What, is this rocket science?”
Jack:  “I could see she was having a problem, so I asked if I could take a look at it.  I guess she was slightly more frustrated than I thought, because she flung the vibe in my direction.”
Karen:  “Yeah, sorry about that.  I don’t know why I let it get under my skin like that.  I can tell you I would have been hoppin’ mad had I actually plunked down good money for this thing only to find, when I got it home, that it didn’t perform as advertised.”
Jack:  “I guess there’s a lesson here for us all.  If you’re paying less then 20 bucks for a molded plastic toy you’re liable to be disappointed.  I mean, think about it.  Maybe the old adage; ‘you get what you pay for’ applies in this instance.”
Karen:  “We never even got around to testing it’s advertised waterproof capability.  Oh well…”
Jack:  “Moving right along.”

Wavy Touch Me Penis Pink $16.15

Jack & Karen
Jack:  “This must not have been our week!  After our less than happy experience with the Perfect Touch Satisfy-Her, we turned our hopes and expectations to the Wavy Touch Me.”
Karen:  “DISAPPOINTED!”
Jack:  “Here we have an 8 1/2 inch textured (wavy) dildo with what they call an Ultra-Gelle skin.  Because of the articulated plastic spine beneath the skin, the dildo bends and then holds its shape.  So far, so good.”
Karen:  “We remember Glenn and Hank’s review of a similar product (HERE) and we were totally looking forward to our little adventure.  The bending capability really appealed to me.  I love G-spot stimulation and I thought this would deliver.”
Jack:  “We never got beyond installing the 2 AA batteries.  (Again, no batteries were included in the package.)  Once the batteries were in place, I tightened the cap on the battery compartment and pushed the button on the base of the vibe to activate the blasted thing.  NOTHING!”
Karen:  “I said; ‘you’ve got to be kidding!  Maybe you have the batteries in wrong.’”
Jack:  “I thought, ok that could be it, although I’m not a complete dork.  I do know how to install batteries.  I loosened the cap on the battery compartment to check my installation when suddenly the thing sprang to life.  WHAT?”
Karen:  “I was really frustrated by this time.  I wanted to get my groove on and all I got was…well nothing.”
Jack:  “Apparently there is a flaw in either the design or the manufacture of this particular vibe.  The contact points didn’t line up properly with the batteries when the cap was securely tightened.  But once the cap was twisted open, the contact points hit the batteries and the vibe worked.”
Karen:  “Of course, that put the kibosh on the whole ‘waterproof’ concept.  D’oh!
I repeat what Jack said about the previous product; what can you expect for $16?  Still had I shelled out the cash, I would have expected it to work, at least for a little bit.”
Jack:  “By this point, I had had it too.  We struck out twice this week.  The Wavy Touch Me landed in the corner with the Perfect Touch Satisfy-Her never to be used again.  We put the disappointment behind us and pulled out one of our trusty toys and went to work on our pleasure.”

Joy and Dixie have two bullet vibes to tell you about.Excite-Her Silver Bullet, Luster Pink $11.99

Joy & Dixie
Dixie:  “We have some good news and some bad news.”
Joy:  “We had two bullet vibes to test — Excite-Her Silver Bullet and Perfect Touch Excite-Her Mega Silver Bullet.  One was great, the other…not so much.”
Dixie:  “First the good news.  The Excite-Her Silver Bullet was very nice.  It has two speeds; a single button control mechanism, which worked just fine; and it’s waterproof.  What’s not to like, right?”
Joy:  “It’s an oversized bullet that really delivers the vibration.  You can use it externally, or internally — vaginally or anally.  Although, I must say, I don’t know if I trust the wire that attaches to the bullet to withstand a tug past a tight anal sphincter.  So you’re will want to take care in that respect, because the bullet will insert easily enough.  It’s the getting it out that might be a problem.”
Dixie:  “And I want to point out that the bullet itself is the only thing that is waterproof.  The hand-held controller/battery case is definitely not waterproof.”
Joy:  “The Excite-Her Silver Bullet runs on two AA batteries.  And like all the toys from this company, the first set of batteries is not included in the package.
Dixie:  “We recommend this vibe.”

Perfect Touch Excite-Her Mega Silver Bullet $13.99

Joy & Dixie
Dixie:  “Now for the bad news.”
Joy:  “As you know, we had these two bullet vibes to test — Excite-Her Silver Bullet and Perfect Touch Excite-Her Mega Silver Bullet.  One was great, the other…not so much.”
Dixie:  “We liked the Excite-Her Silver Bullet, it was very nice.”
Joy:  “The Perfect Touch Excite-Her Mega Silver Bullet is another story.  It too is an oversized bullet vibe, bigger even than the Excite-Her.  I loved the size of the bullet; the bigger the better for my vaginal insertions, thank you very much!”  cnvsyn-syn2100202
Dixie:  “And like it’s smaller sibling, this vibe is also waterproof.  But again I want to point out that the bullet itself is the only thing that is waterproof.  The hand-held controller/battery case is definitely not waterproof.”
Joy:  “And that gets us to the problem with this vibe.  The power-pack sucks, and not in a good way.”
Dixie:  “Yeppers, Joy’s right.  I mean the concept is a good one — it has a varying speed dial on the side of the hand-held power-pack that is supposed to adjust the vibe speed incrementally, like a rheostat on a light switch.”
Joy:  “If the manufacturer had pulled this off, the Perfect Touch Excite-Her Mega Silver Bullet would rock — big bullet and varying speed.  Sadly, the rheostat thingy is made really cheaply and so it really doesn’t work.  It turns on ok, but dialing the speed up or down just made the vibe sputter.  BUMMER!”
Dixie:  “The Mega Silver Bullet runs on three AA batteries.  And like all the toys from this company, the first set of batteries is not included in the package.
Joy:  “We cannot recommend this vibe.  We do, however, have a few words of advice for the Synergy Erotic people.  Why not invest more in the production values of your products and make a name for yourself in terms of quality, not price per unit. We’d be willing to pay considerably more for a vibe, like this, that actually worked as advertised.”
Dixie:  “What’s the use of spending a mere $16 for a toy that will wind up in the trash in no time.  It’s a shameful waste, if you ask me.”

ENJOY!

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To Have and To Hold

Hey sex fans,

I am so glad we finally got the new Review Site rockin’ n rollin’, because the Dr Dick Review Crew has been itchin’ to update you on a whole bunch of new products.

Have you visited Dr Dick’s Set Toy Reviews yet?  If not, what the hell are you waiting for?  It’s so cool; easy to navigate, easy to search and each product has it’s own review.  You can even search for all the reviews done by your favorite Review Crew member.  CHECK IT OUT!

This week’s Review Crew include: Jada and Jack & Karen.

Jada is here with a Jelique product.
Tasty Twist Oral-Sex Balm $10.95

Jada: “I love this new site, Dr Dick’s Set Toy Reviews; I’m so proud to be part of this effort.

I would like to introduce you to an interesting product — Tasty Twist Oral-Sex Balm. It’s a creamy lotion one applies to one’s genitals, or the genitals of a partner to flavor them up and make them tingle.

I should say from the outset that I would have never considered using this product had I seen it in the store. I would have simply passed it by. You see, I like the way I taste and smell when I am aroused.

I used Tasty Twist Oral-Sex Balm first by myself. It has an intense butter cream scent. It has a pleasant enough taste with a hint of mint. I licked some off my finger first before I put some around my labia. The hint of mint comes from the menthol in the ingredients. This, I assume, is also what adds the tingling effect.

It tastes like icing on a cake. It’s sweet to the tongue, but it also has a bit of a chemical aftertaste. Maybe that’s the mineral oil base; I don’t know. What I do know for sure is that, because of the mineral oil base, this product is not compatible with latex condoms. But I believe that Tasty Twist Oral-Sex Balm is geared toward masturbation and oral sex.

Jack & Karen are here with another Jelique product.

Tooshies $8.95

Karen:  “I’m a new-cumer to anal.  Sometimes it takes me a while to warm up to this particular activity.”
Jack:  “I love her for trying anal.  She did it just to please me.”
Karen:  “Well, that and it feels great once I get over the first hurtle.”
Jack:  “We were lucky enough to score Tooshies to review.  It’s a minty flavored Benzocaine based numbing gel formulated to ease the initial discomfort of anal sex.”
Karen:  “We’ve been looking around for such a product, but didn’t know which one to choose.  Or if such gels and or lube worked.”
Jack:  “Tooshies works!”
Karen:  “It does; that’s for sure.  It’s just the thing I need to boost my confidence and to desensitize my rectum.  I just have to say, Benzocaine is not for everyone.  It’s pretty common for some people to have an allergic reaction to it.  I suggest you try a little dab on the inside of your elbow first to see if you have a reaction or not.  The inside of your elbow is not the same thing as the mucus membranes in you rectum, but you’ll have a better sense of things nonetheless.”
Jack:  “And while we’re pointing out cautions, all you tops out there better wear a condom when your bottom is using Tooshies.  No, it’s not for safe sex reasons!  It’s because the Benzocaine will get on your dick during the fuck and you’ll experience a numbing sensation on your rod, and that ain’t good.  Or at least it wasn’t for me.”

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Rest Ye Merry Gentlemen…and Gentlewomen

REVIEW #28

Hey sex fans,

It’s Week 4, and the final week, of our Holiday Extravaganza.  Did you somehow miss Week 1, 2 or 3 of this lollapalooza?  Shame on you!  Check out Reviews #25, 26 and 27.  You’ll be so glad ya did.

The Dr Dick Review Crew has been workin’ overtime gettin you these reviews and now all our naughty parts are sore as all get out.  Thank god this is the last week; we need a break, don’t cha know!

This week’s Review Crew include:

  • Jack & Karen — Reviews #17, 18, 25, 27
  • Joy & Dixie— Reviews #6, 12, 16, 17, 18, 23, 27
  • Glenn & Hank — Reviews #4, 16, 17, 18, 23. 24, 27
  • Gina & Kevin — Reviews #4, 13, 16, 17, 18, 23, 24, 27
  • Ken & Denise — Reviews #11, 16, 25
  • Jada — Reviews #14, 16, 20

First up Ken & Denise introduce us to a beautiful wooden insertable from Hans at Hardwood Dildos.  I’m a big fan of Hans’.  He is more than a craftsman; he’s an artist.  He really knows his wood and his woodies!  We have just this one dildo to review, but his site is virtually overflowing with ingenious designs.  When you visit, be sure to tell him Dr Dick sent you.

Apple Wood Dildo $99

Ken:  “I was hoping I would be one of the lucky chosen ones to review one of the great wooden dildos we’ve featured during our Holiday Extravaganza.  I lucked out!  Denise and I have a real beauty.”433a.jpg
Denise:  “That is so true.  Unfortunately, our Apple Wood Dildo doesn’t come already named, like the ones reviewed earlier in this series.”
Ken:  “Well, it’s only unfortunate if you’re not clever enough to come up with name all on your own.  I’ve christened ours Peter…for obvious reasons.”
Denise:  “I stand corrected.  Maybe I need to be punished.  😉
Ken:  “You’d like that, wouldn’t you?  Just you wait till we get home, young lady!”
Denise:  “Ohhh, Daddy!”
Ken:  “We seem to be veering off topic.  Back to our beautiful Hardwood Dildo.  It is made of Apple wood, a fine-grained, dense wood, which has a very fair color, kinda like maple or cherry.  Apparently, the wood comes from trees pruned in Oregon.”
Denise:  “Hardwood Dildos is another brilliant GREEN northwest company; so hurray for that!  It also has a very traditional shape to it.  Unlike some of the other wooden insertables on the market, there is no denying this Apple Wood Dildo is a phallus. It’s 6.25″ x 1.6″/2.6″ with a luscious dickhead and a nice base for easy handling.”
Ken:  “That phallus shape suits us just fine, huh honey?”
Denise:  “You betcha!  I’m real old fashioned gal that way.  I love the way it feel in my pussy and my ass.”
Ken:  “You can use all kinds of lube with this Hardwood Dildo.  It warms nicely to your body very quickly too.”
Denise:  “Wash with warm soapy water and dry thoroughly with a soft cloth and you’re done. You can wipe it down with a lint-free towel moistened with peroxide, rubbing alcohol or a 10% bleach solution too.”
Ken:  “I feel like I own a unique piece of art, because no two Hardwood Dildos are alike.”
Denise:  “And anyone concerned about the finish on these dildos; oughtn’t worry.  They get at least five coats of a food grade varnish called a Salad Bowl Finish.”
Ken:  “If you are looking for wood (literally or figuratively) Hardwood Dildos is the place to shop.”
Denise:  “I hope I find another one of these beauties under my tree this Christmas.”
Ken:  “Maybe you could take your tree to Hans after the holidays and have him whip up a little something for you.”
Denise:  “What a great idea!  I wonder if he does requests. Happy Holidays everyone.”

Gina & Kevin introduce us to a couple of lovable toys for the big kid in all of us. These come from the good people at Big Teaze Toys. Dr Dick gives a bunch of extra points for the delightful names. You go Big Teaze!

I Rub My Duckie Bondage $25.99

Gina:  “If a company can make me smile and make me cum at the same time, they win my heart. Now my heart belongs to Big Teaze. I Rub My Duckie Bondage is just one of the great Collector’s Series duckies available from Big Teaze Toys. You have to see the other!  Makes me giggle just visiting the site.”irubmyduckie.jpg
Kevin:  “I got such a kick out of this.  And speaking of kicks; this little bugger is mighty powerful.”
Gina:  “Bondage Duckie has a permanent place in our bathroom.  It is always in reach.  There is nothing better than a waterproof vibe.  I love to get off in the tub.”
Kevin:  “It’s a real conversation piece too. It even comes with its own set of Duckie-sized handcuffs.  What a hoot!  Guests always comment on our fashionable BDSM Duckie.  Little do they know.”
Gina:  “When Kevin and I enjoy a soak together we never forget to invite Duckie.  And you can use it several different ways.  But I think you should find that out on your own.”
Kevin:  “Batteries ARE included.  So your first rides are free!”

I Rub My Wormie Pink Travel Size $22.99

Kevin:  “The I Rub My Wormie we have is the travel sized one.  That makes is a bit smaller than the regular size.  It make an excellent butt plug.”
Gina:  “Or Pussy plug! I Rub My Wormie has a, ergonomic bend in his neck to reach your G- or P-spot.  It has an easy-grip body so he won’t wiggle out of irubmywormie.jpgyour hands.”
Kevin:  “Oh baby, Oh baby, you make me so hot!!  Don’t forget the 3-speeds of vibration.”
Gina:  “It actually is the perfect toy to travel with.  Airport security will think you are carrying a baby’s toy.  If they only knew.
Kevin:  “All you health conscious consumers out there should know these toys are non-toxic, Phthalate-free, PVC-free and latex-free.”
Gina:  “Sadly, I Rub My Wormie does not come with batteries.  What’s up with that Big Teaze Toys?  No one should be creating battery operated toys without including the fist set of batteries.  It’s just wrong.
Kevin:  “Gina and I agree these toys make ideal holiday gifts.  Just make sure if you plan to give one of these as a gift that you buy the toy with the batteries, or include the batteries as part of your gift.”
Gina:  “No one wants a toy that can’t be used right out of the package.”
Kevin:  “Merry Christmas and Happy Holidays from both of us.”
Gina:  “And a Happy orgasm-filled New Year too!”

Now Jada gives us the finger, as it were. This is a clever first offering from a new Canadian company — Fun To Have.

Fun Finger $20.00

Jada:  At first I thought this was some kind of gag.  I mean Fun Finger looks like something you’d funfinger-016.jpgfind on one of those prank websites.  It’s basically a big golden thumb. Fun Finger is soft and flexible.  It has a multi-speed vibrator that is adjusted on the base of the finger. It’s made in China of TPR (Thermoplastic Rubber), which is non-toxic, but anyone allergic to latex will not be able use this.  I’m not a big fan of Chinese made products, especially nowadays, but this one seems harmless enough.

I did like the unique shape — the cocked thumb.  It’s perfect for G-spot stimulation.  I wouldn’t, however, recommend it for prostate stimulation.  There’s nothing to hold on to at the base and it could easily slip in your bum and disappear.  And that would very unpleasant indeed.

Fun Finger would make a fun stocking stuffer for the light-hearted person on your list.

Happy holidays everyone!

Our favorite perv Review Crew members — Joy & Dixie and Glenn & Hank tackle some very interesting devices from Rachel’s Pleasures.

G–Spotter $16.20

Joy & Dixiejp440.jpg

Dixie:  “This is our second go around with these sorts of products.  Joy and I, Glenn and Hank and others did a whole series on some of the products from Sportsheets.  You can find those reviews by searching for the word ‘Sportsheets’.”
Joy:  “Dixie and I prefer Rachel’s product line to the other.  For one thing, we found them more comfortable.”
Dixie:  “I hope this doesn’t sound petty, but we also like Rachel’s packaging better.  It’s more fun and it isn’t so blatantly heterosexual.”
Joy:  “Basically, the G–Spotter is a device that one attaches to the bottom’s ankles so the top can maneuver the bottom’s legs with more ease.  The bottom can hold the strap herself or the top can hold it and move it from side to side.”
Dixie:  “I liked the Cumfy Cuffs.  They are padded for comfort, quick release gismo that is real handy. The G–Spotter is also easily adjustable.”

Cumfy Cuffs And Cumfy Cuffs Extensions Kit $22.50

Glenn & Hank jp125.jpg

Glenn: “Hank and I agree with Dixie. We also like Rachel’s packaging better than the Sportsheets packaging. I guess it’s a gay thing!”
Hank: “In fact, we liked everything about the Rachel’s line better. We agree with the gals, it’s a more comfortable setup”
Glenn: “Not that the bottom is supposed to be comfortable all the time. If ya catch my drift.”
Hank: “Yeah, but Rachel’s line of products, although practical and fully functional, is geared toward the bondage novice, wouldn’t you agree?”
Glenn: “Absolutely! But we all have to start somewhere.” 😉
Hank: “Do you know a budding kinkster? Maybe you’re one yourself.
Glenn: “Maybe you’d just like to know the thrill of relinquishing control for an itsy bitsy moment or two.”

Neoprene Harness $24.30

Joy & Dixie introduce us to the Neoprene Harness.

Joy:  “Now this is something I can really sink my teeth into.”
Dixie:  “What she means to say is ‘…sink a nice big dildo into’.”jp229.jpg
Joy:  “I loves me my strap-ons!  I have quite a collection.  Some are more comfortable than others, but I love ‘em all.”
Dixie:  “I’m not as much of a connoisseur, as Joy, but this Neoprene Harness is very comfortable, I must say.”
Joy:  “It is that!  It is also reversible and machine washable.  I love that part.  I hate having to clean lube and whatnot off my leather harness.”
Dixie:  “It’s also fully adjustable.  It would have to be to fit both Joy and I.  We have such different body types.”
Joy:  “This is a really terrific start-out harness for the beginner.  It’s inexpensive, yet practical.  You just plug in the insertable of your choice (like the one that Ken & Denise showed us earlier) and then go fuck yourself some…whatever.”
Dixie:  “Exactly!  I’ve already told my ‘straight’ office mate about this.  She’s gonna surprise her BF for X-mas.”
Joy:  “You go, Danna!!  Give it to him good.”
Dixie:  “Thank you Dr Dick for a great year of products.  We certainly look forward to the New Year and what it may bring.”
Joy:  “Have a very sexy and sensual holiday season everyone.  See ya in the New Year.”

Rachel’s Bed Spread (w/cuffs) $64.53

Glenn & Hank

Hank:  “Now this is more like it! Rachel’s Bed Spread allows you can create a little bondage magic without the screw anchors and bolts in the ceiling and walls needed for more traditional bondage apparatus.”

Glenn:  “I love being restrained spread eagle on the bed.  I love relinquishing control to my partner(s) and being ravaged by him/them.”

Hank:  “And now we can play like this our own bedroom, or take it on vacation with us.”

Glenn:  “These two straps go around the mattress and allow us to attach wrist or ankle cuffs to the straps. The straps are adjustable fitting a twin up to a King Size bed

Hank:  “Rachel’s Bed Spread is not the least be threatening.  In fact, if you just wanna mess around with some power-play this is just the thing for you.”

Glenn:  “But it also works for those of us who are a tad more hardcore.”

Hank:  “And it’s a breeze to set up. It only took a few minutes.”

Glenn:  “And it’s reasonably priced.”

Hank:  “So if you are a rank amateur or a seasoned pro, you’ll have a great time testing your limits.  We did!”

Glenn:  “We think Rachel’s Pleasures rocks.”

Hank:  “We both wish you a Merry Christmas and a very edgy New Year.”

So there ya have it, Sex Fans.  We hope our Holiday Extravaganza provided you with lot of swell gift giving ideas.  Look for more Product Reviews in the New Year.

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Fa la la la la, La la la la

REVIEW #27

Hey sex fans,

Holy mackerel!  It’s Week 3 of our Holiday Extravaganza.  Did you somehow miss Week 1 or 2 of this lollapalooza?  Shame on you!  Check out Reviews #25 and 26.  You’ll be so glad ya did.

The Dr Dick Review Crew has our review apparatus workin’ overtime.  We want to get as many reviews out there before the end of the year.  Because we certainly don’t want to leave you hanging…as it were.  This week, we have yet another hot juicy load of swell holiday gift giving ideas for you.  And guess what?  They are all GREEN.

This week’s Review Crew include:

  • Jack & Karen — Reviews #17, 18, 25
  • Joy & Dixie— Reviews #6, 12, 16, 17, 18, 23
  • Me, Dr Dick — Reviews #1 – 5, 7 – 10, 12, 14, 15, 19, 21, 25, 26
  • Glenn & Hank — Reviews #4, 16, 17, 18, 23. 24
  • Gina & Kevin — Reviews #4, 13, 16, 17, 18, 23, 24

First up we have two brilliant wooden insertables from my very good friends at Jildos; The Art You Love To Touch! Jildos are American made, hand-crafted works of art.  They are produced by a company called: WoodPeckers Roost.  Can you stand it?  They are made from the most durable, safe materials available and they are GREEN, oh so GREEN.

Hart $69.00

Joy & Dixie

Joy:  “I’ve had a hankerin’ for a wooden dildo for ages.  I’ve admired them online and even held a few in h_020804.jpgmy hands at our local sex emporium.  But nothing compares to owing one and having it inside you.”
Dixie:  “That is so true. Hart is simply beautiful. It’s made of exotic Bocote wood, which gives it a very distinctive striped appearance.  And besides it’s beauty it is as functional as all get-out. It has a long, smooth shaft that allows you to enjoy deep penetration using either end.”
Joy:  “Yeah, and it’s a ‘double header’ too. There is a ball at one end that is ideal for G-spot (or P-spot) stimulation.  But it also has a more traditional head on the other end, which is followed by 4 ridges.  I love my dildos ridged!”
Dixie:  “I agree, I love the rippling sensation too.  And I like that it’s size is not overwhelming.  It’s 10.5” long, but it’s only 1.25” in diameter at its widest point.”
Joy:  “We spent a lot of time trying it every which way.  And it is safe to use with all kinds of lubes.  We are partial to silicone-based lubes and because Hart is so naturally smooth, a very little bit of lube goes a long way.”
Dixie:  “Caring for this beauty is blissfully simple. Wash with warm soapy water and dry thoroughly with a soft cloth. You can also wipe it down with a lint-free towel moistened with peroxide, rubbing alcohol or a 10% bleach solution.”
Joy:  “Then you can use the wax packet provided with Hart to restore it’s natural luster. Just rub it on and buff it off.”
Dixie:  “Your Jildo Dildo will come with a Certificate of Authenticity and a nice velvet pouch for discreet storage.”
Joy:  “Jildos has a wide array of shapes and styles to choose from.  This is the ideal holiday gift for the GREEN consumer.”

Whimsy $69.00

Glenn & Hank

Hank:  “We have a more manly sized Jildo Dildo. Then do the girls.”wh_020820_0.jpg
Glenn:  “I just love that name!  ‘Honey, can you please pass the Jildo Dildo?’”
Hank:  “I know, and we don’t even have to christen this one, because it comes with its own name — Whimsy.”
Glenn:  “It’s a nice 1.5” wide and a bit shorter, at 10”, than Joy & Dixie’s Hart.”
Hank:  “I don’s suppose we have to repeat all the stuff that the girls said about lube, care and cleaning and all, do we?  Good!”
Glenn:  “Yeah, but we should describe it better.”
Hank:  “Oh, ok!  It’s made of American Cherry wood.”
Glenn:  “Think of it as cherry pie on a stick.”
Hank:  “You are such a dork!”
Glenn:  “You love it!”
Hank:  “Our Whimsy is also a ‘double header’. One end is rounded.  Think prostate stimulation…or G-spot stimulation. The other end is bullet shaped.  There’s a combination of swirls and ridges, which deliver a variety of sensations with the old in and out.”
Glenn:  “Mmmm, in and out!”
Hank:  “Have you ever met a hornier bastard?”
Glenn:  “I’m an unapologetic power bottom; what can I say?  And when Hank works my ass with Whimsy, I’m in pig heaven.  And this thing warms to my body very fast.  It’s like totally awesome.”
Hank:  “He’s so right.  I can work this boy in to a froth of sexual frenzy with this thing.  And I like that it’s very masculine looking.  Despite it’s beauty, it doesn’t look out of place next to all of Glenn’s other insertables.”
Glenn:  “And I do have quite a collection.  At the same time, we could leave this on the coffee table as an object ‘d art for all to admire.
Hank:  “If you’re lookin’ for insertable art for your holiday giving, look no further than a stunning Jildo Dildo.”
Glenn:  “One final thing.  You absolutely have to check out their dildo lore page.  It is amazing.

Keeping with today’s GREEN theme we’ve got a couple of delicious products from a little company in Vancouver, BC called Hathor Aphrodisia.

Lubricant Pure 4 oz $18.00 CAD

I, Dr Dick, have the distinct pleasure of introducing you to Lubricant Pure. I am so fond of this mighty-mite of a company from right here in the beautiful Pacific Northwest.  What a joy it is to bring their products to your attention.

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Ya’ll know my passion for GREEN adult products, right? Hathor Aphrodisia is a boutique company that brings us only a few choice products, but each one is a work of love.

Lubricant Pure is an exceptionally fine personal lube.  It contains pure botanical emollients including Horny Goat Weed, Jujube Zizyphus and Siberian Ginseng, which are supposed to have aphrodisiacal properties.  Can’t honestly say I noticed any difference in my sexual response cycle.  But as my granny used to say, ‘It couldn’t hurt!’

Lubricant Pure is water-based, so it’s condom compatible. It’s slippery, non-sticky and there’s no fragrance, which really appealed to me.  I hate when lubes have an odor.

And as you would guess from a company like this, Lubricant Pure even tastes nice.  I mean don’t you just hate getting some lubes in your mouth?  I know I do. They taste all chemically?

Sex fans, if you want your sex to be GREEN?  Here’s a way to do that and support a fantastic little company that is doing the right thing.

Lubricant Pure makes a great stocking stuffer too.

Lubricant Lickeurs — Coconut Orange        4 oz $22.00 CAD

Lubricant Lickeurs — Coconut Orange 4 oz $22.00 CAD

Gina & Kevin

Karen:  “This is so cool.  I’m a big tea drinker.  Never been one for coffee, but I do know my teas.  And since I’m a naturally hyper kinda gal, I try to avoid caffeine as much as possible.  These teas are delicious and they are herbal.”

Jack:  “I, on the other hand, am not a big tea drinker, but I agree; these teas are good.  There’s an earthiness to them that I really liked.

Karen:  “First up today is My Maple Cookie.  I love it; what a name. This tea is a unique blend of premium herbs specially formulated to change the female genitalia and male semen to smell and taste like maple cookies.  How fun is that?”

Jack:  “Who would have guessed something like this was even possible.  I have to admit, it’s the damnedest thing.  Karen and I shared the tin of 12 tea bags over a 10 day period.  We both noticed a difference in the way we smelled and tasted.  Don’t get me wrong; I love the natural taste of she and me, but this is way fun.”

Karen:  “Jack’s right.  Although, I sometimes find his cum to be kind of acrid. My Maple Cookie

Jack:  “I like the taste of my own jizz.  I never find it acrid.  But I don’t taste it every day.  So I bow to Karen’s critique.”

Karen:  “The Intimate Teas website suggests pouring 8 ounces of hot water over a tea bag and let steep for 5 minutes.  Then gently squeeze the tea bag to let the active ingredients fully release into the water.  You may remove tea bag or allow to stay in water for stronger tea.”

Jack:  “This tea is not a miracle worker.  It won’t cover a multitude of sins.  Hell, even I know to avoid some foods like onions and garlic, a lot of booze and, of course, smoking, if you want your spunk to taste sweeter.” changed that in just two days.To continue this week’s GREEN, and I might add YUMMY, theme we veer toward the food end of the spectrum.

Jack:  “Next up we have Screaming O tea.  The Intimate Teas people get high marks for the clever names and the packaging.”
Karen:  “They sure enough do!  This tea is a premium blend of unique herbs made to increase sexual passion in both women and men.  It is supposed to be an aphrodisiac, sexual stimulant and it’s supposed to intensify orgasms.”screaming-o-full-product-page3.jpg
Jack:  “That’s what it says on the website.  I was dubious…at first.  I figured, I already have intense orgasms, do I really need to improve on that…even if it’s possible?”
Karen:  “Things are much different for us gals, but I think you know that already.  I felt like the tea really did stimulate me.  And maybe it was only wishful thinking, but I felt my orgasms intensified too.”
Jack:  “Again, I defer to my lovely wife.  One thing for sure; this tea is a stimulant.  The first time I had this tea was near bedtime.  I thought, a nice cup of warm tea will make me sleep like a baby.  NOT!  I tossed and turned all night long.  But I did have a raging boner in the morning.  I don’t know if those two thing are connected, but they did follow one after the other.”
Karen:  “Kevin and I split the 12 tea bags between us, like the My Maple Cookie tea.  I didn’t drink my tea at bedtime, so I couldn’t corroborate Kevin’s story.”
Jack:  “I say, if you’re feelin’ a little pookie in the libido department, give this tea a try.  I suspect you will be pleasantly surprised.
Karen:  “That goes double for the women in our audience.  And these teas come in these charming little tins.  They make perfect gifts any time of the year, but especially during the holidays.”