Oh what fun it is to ride…

Hey sex fans,

It’s Product Review Friday and this is Week 4 of this year’s Holiday Gift Giving Guide.

This week we will hear from Review Crew members: Glenn & Hank, Dixie and Brad.

First up we have yet another exquisite erotic art insertable from the artisans at XHale Glass. This is the third product we’ve reviewed from this outstanding company.

Mister Twister —— $129.95

Glenn & Hank
Glenn: “WE’RE BACK! Did you miss us? We missed you. Well actually, we missed the sex toys. Being a Review Crew member has its perks.”
Hank: “He’s in such a good mood because we got to review another toy that he can shove up his ass. Glenn has the hungriest hole around.”
Glenn: “I like to think of it as talented, not hungry.”
Hank: “A rosebud by any other name…”
Glenn: “Speaking of talented; a literary allusion and an asshole allusion all in one sentence. You’re on a roll, my man!”
Hank: “Ok, let’s get on with it. What we have here is an art glass butt plug. Mister Twister is just one of the beautiful creations to be had when you visit XHale online. Glenn and I are new to glass, but after this little encounter; there will surely be more glass toys to come.”
Glenn: “This petite beauty is only 3 3/8” tall. It has a very modest girth of not much more than an inch. This is your starter butt plug model. I’m like totally used to way bigger toys in my ass, but there is something about this stunning little number that makes it one of my favorites. I feel all dressed up with this puppy pluggin my hole. Maybe that’s because it’s art, baby. All XHale art is individually handmade, which makes my insertable even more precious to me. No one else in the world has exactly the same one as I.”
Hank: “It sure is! It also has this amazing blue and white swirl in the solid glass. That’s why when Mister Twister joined our dildo and plug collection it was like a snowy dove trooping with crows.”
Glenn: “There you go again! Apparently you’ve got Romeo and Juliet on the brain. But you’re right; Mister Twister is a jewel, that’s for sure.”
Hank: “Because this is the highest quality glass, it will last a lifetime; ya just gotta treat it with care.”
Glenn: “XHale helps you do that by providing a very sturdy black padded drawstring pouch to keep your insertable art safe from getting nicked or chipped. But we think Mister Twister is so beautiful; when it’s not adorning my hole it is proudly placed on our mantle.”
Hank: “And if you think that is gross, you don’t know squat about glass insertables. You can clean this baby with simple soap and water; wipe it down with a lint-free towel moistened with peroxide, rubbing alcohol or a 10% bleach solution; or sterilize in boiling water or the dishwasher.”
Glenn: “You can use any sort of lube you want to with a glass object like this. And a little goes a very long way. For someone unfamiliar with a butt plug, this will take some getting use to. It’s hard as a rock. But once you get the hang of it, it will be your material of choice from there on out. I can wear Mister Twister for hours on end. There’s no chafing; nothing like that.”
Hank: “And you can warm or chill glass for an added sensation.”
Glenn: “Not all glass toys are made of the same quality glass. But if you are considering a purchase, look for the name XHale. You will not be disappointed.”
Hank: “Glass, particularly stunning art glass like this, is gonna cost you. But what thing of quality won’t?”
Glenn: “If you know someone with an asshole and that person is very special; then Mister Twister is the ideal holiday gift for him or her.”

Next another vibe from our friends at Vibratex.

Neo Cockring by Vibratex —— $24.99

Brad
So I was like totally hot for the Neo Cockring when I saw it in its stylish plexiglas storage case. At 33 I’m just discovering the joys of wearing a cockring. I was telling some of my gay clients at the gym about getting my first cockring about a month ago. They looked at me like I had just landed from outer space. OK, so I’m a late bloomer; sue me!

The Neo Cockring is a clear jelly sorta deal. Although it’s not a jelly, it’s made of a phthalate-free elastomer. This may not make a difference to you, but it sure does to me. I don’t do anything that may contain phthalates. I mean, why would I endanger my health if I don’t have to?

The thing that rocks, or is supposed to, is this cockring has a built-in vibe, and it has this tickler side to it. And even though the vibe is a tiny thing; it has two activation choices. The first is a side button that remains “on” until depressed, and the second is a pressure sensitive pad behind the ticklers. So my GF is like waiting for me to warp this thing around my johnson and show her what it’ll do to her clit. I position the ring around my dick and balls with the vibe on the top of my cock with the tickle head pointing outward. Are you following this?

I activate the vibe and…well I feel it, but it ain’t rockin my world; as I had hoped. But ok, maybe the vibe is not for me but my GF. Ahhh, not so fast! She says she can feel it too, and she likes the way it turns itself on as it comes in contact with her clit, but there ain’t enough bang for her buck either.

Bummer, cuz this is such a great concept. You can see the Vibratex people put some thought into this. I mean, the thing is waterproof and all; comes with batteries as well as a replacement set. I never saw another vibe like that. But still the vibe is a little too limp, if ya know what I mean.

Finely, something very unique from Doc Johnson.

Wish-Bone Vibrator —— $25.50

Dixie
I’m doing a solo review today. My partner, Joy, is working on another review for later in this series.

I have something no nonsense to show you this time around. It’s about as simple and straightforward as you can get. It’s the Wish-Bone Vibrator.

I’ve used a lot of vibes in my day. I think I own nearly two-dozen of them. Some I’ve used a couple of times and that’s it; I never touch them again. Others are favorites that I put to very good use frequently. However, none of them look like the Wish-Bone. So this little wonder gets high marks for it’s clever design.

Here’s how it works; you put your index finger (I prefer to use my middle finger) through the notch at the top of the vibe. You finger tip lands on the single button that switches on the vibe and rotates it through its three speeds before coming to off. That’s it; no bells, no whistles, just solid thoughtful design and construction.

It’s a perfect design. I love to finger myself when I jill-off. This extends my finger for effortless fingering. It’s made of a hard plastic (phthalate-free) that excellently conducts the vibration. It’s fabulous on my clit. And if that isn’t enough, the thing is waterproof. It’s so ideal; I now have the Wish-Bone permanently placed on the ledge of my tub.

And thank you, Doc Johnson, for including the first set of batteries. That was mighty thoughtful of you.

Looking for a sweet little inexpensive stocking stuffer that will put a smile on a lady friend’s face. Look no farther than the Wish-Bone.

ENJOY!

November 13, 2009July 15, 2026

As much as I hate to admit it, it’s that time of the year again. Today The Dr Dick Review Crew throws it into high gear to bring you our first installment of this year’s Holiday Gift Giving Guide. We want to get as many reviews out there in the next month as possible. We want you to have a load of swell holiday gift giving ideas, don’t cha know.

This week’s Review Crew includes: Joy & Dixie, Angie and Christa.

We start the day off right with two offerings from Doc Johnson.

Awesome Blossom —— $46.99

Joy & Dixie
Dixie: “We have a beauty for you this week. It’s called Awesome Blossom.”
Joy: “We are like totally getting into glass insertables. Six months ago we didn’t own a one. Now we do though.”
Dixie: “Yep, we are now the proud owners of three glass dildos. And they are spectacular. There is something about glass that really turns my crank.”
Joy: “Awesome Blossom is made of tempered glass. If you treat it with respect, as you would any fine adult toy, this thing will last a lifetime.”
Dixie: “Glass is so practical. There are no batteries to run down; nothing to recharge. It’s ready when you are.”
Joy: “Glass is nonporous and hypoallergenic, care and cleaning are a snap. For everyday cleanup a mild soap and water wash is fine. You can wipe it down with a 10% bleach solution. However, if you’re gonna share your Awesome Blossom or any other toy, sterilizing is recommended. Slip it into a pot of boiling water for a couple minutes and then it’s ready to go. Hey, ya can even pop this puppy in the dishwasher for a no fuss, no muss clean up.”
Dixie: “Exactly! And we’re all about sharing.”
Joy: “Oh, we should mention, for the sake of all our gay-boy friends, that Awesome Blossom makes a wonderful ass play toy too. You see it has a base on it that will keep it from popping into your pooper. The base also lets us use it in our harness. So there’s that!”
Dixie: “You can either chill or warm this beauty. And when it comes to lube; any lube will do. Regardless what kind of lube you choose, just know that a little goes a very long way.”
Joy: “In our rush to tell you all the features of glass, we have yet to describe Awesome Blossom. Atop the spiraled, clear-green shaft there is a clear teardrop shaped head. Inside the head is a three-dimensional image of a flower. The flower is a kind of wildflower, I would guess. The kind that blankets a meadow in the spring. It’s really sweet and lovely.”
Dixie: “The shaft is just over 1″ in diameter. The head is only a bit larger at about 1 1/4″ in diameter. The whole thing is just under 8” tall. There’s a bit of a curve to the shaft which make it perfect for G-spot (or P-spot) stimulation.
Joy: “We LOVE our awesome Awesome Blossom! We both highly recommend this toy.”
Dixie: “There is only one drawback. This beautiful, beautiful functional art piece does not come with a storage pouch. What’s up with that? It certainly deserves one. We wrap ours in a towel to keep it safe when it’s not punishing our pussies. You’ll want to do the same.”
Joy: “This would make the ideal gift for someone special.”

Next, Angie is up with the other Doc Johnson toy.

Alumination — Pink —— $29.90

Angie
Hello everyone! So glad to be with you again. I have the pleasure, both literally and figuratively, of introducing you to Alumination. It is my first metallic vibe and I like it very much.

It’s about as simple and straightforward a pleasure instrument as possible. It’s very slim and sleek; it’s made of aluminum; it’s waterproof; and it’s a 3-speed vibrator. It runs on two AAA-batteries (not included in the package). It’s not gonna knock your socks off in the power department, but it does get the job done.

One of the best features of an aluminum toy is that it is so heat sensitive. You can add additional sensations to the vibration by chilling and/or warming the toy. My favorite is chilling it by dipping it in a dish of ice water for a few moments. Oh MY!

It’s just 6″ long, maybe 3/4” in diameter. Like I said, slim and sleek. It’s very quiet too, which I really appreciate.

Those of you who follow my reviews know that I love a waterproof vibe more than anything. Bath time is my time and my Alumination has been my companion for several weeks now. Only had to replace the batteries once. The battery compartment is easy to open and close, which is a huge plus in my book.

Aluminum is nonporous and hypoallergenic. Cleanup with mild soap and water; wipe it down with a 10% bleach solution or peroxide. You can even sterilize it in boiling water for a couple minutes.

The packaging is minimal, but very pretty nonetheless.

Alumination comes in black and gold beside the pink that I have. If you are considering trying a metallic vibe, I think this is a great place to start. And considering the under $30 price tag it makes a very nice gift that won’t break the bank.

Finally, the oh so charming Christa will tell us about her Synergy Erotic vibe.

Silicone Tsunami, Lavender —— $59.99

Christa
Wow, Dr Dick, you called on me to review a normal toy this time. What, you couldn’t find any freaky stuff for me? How odd!

Just kidding. I know I’m weird and all, but hey, I have my normal moments too. And the Tsunami is perfect for when I’m being my other self, the small town girl from Indiana.

So here’s the 411 on this amazing little vibe. It runs on 2 AA-batteries. Unfortunately, none came in the package. Hey you guys, some of us are starving students! Toss us a bone here and include some freakin’ batteries in your package, why don’t cha?

Anyhow, this sweetie is 100% silicone, which is like the only material that I’ll let near my precious pussy. I gotta have hypoallergenic or forget about it! I also sometime share my toys with my sub, butt-boy BF, Alex. He’s this total ass whore. I’m the first chick he ever had play with his prostate. Now it’s fuck me, fuck me, fuck me all the time. SHEESH!

You can share silicone toys because you can sterilize them. I can swish the Tsunami in boiling water for that purpose. I also wipe down my toys with a 10% bleach solution and a lint-free cloth between each use. But you can use peroxide or rubbing alcohol too. Warm water and mild soap is what I use if I’m gonna keep the toy all to my self.

The wicked thing about the Tsunami is that it has 10 fuckin’ vibration modes. That’s like crazy! I never had a toy with so many different vibrations. Luckily, it has an on/off button too, so you don’t have to run through all the modes to get to off. Much appreciate that!

It’s waterproof too, which is a damn good thing, cuz I can flood the bed when I cum. The BF thinks this is totally hot, so I like to give him a good show. Oh, and the vibration is almost all in the curved little tip. This is perfect for the whole G-spot stim thing. That’s how I get so wet, BTW!

So do yourself a favor and get one of these for yourself, or your ass whore BF. If you have one of them.

ENJOY!

October 16, 2009July 15, 2026

Fabulous Four

Because The Dr Dick Review Crew has been inundated with loads of swell adult products to review, we will be presenting several different toys each week till we relieve the backlog.

Despite it not even being Halloween yet, I know from my forays into the land of retail that holiday gift giving is not far from the minds of a lot of people. Perish the thought! So expediting our reviews will also give you loads of gift-giving ideas. And that, my friends, is all I’m gonna say about that till at least the middle of next month when we launch our annual Holiday Gift Giving Guide.

Today we will hear from Review Crew Members: Madora, Joy & Dixie, Brad and Glenn & Hank. So without further ado…

There’s something brand-spankin new goin on at Fleshlight. Here’s Brad to tell us all about it.

Sex In A Can: Spread Eagle Brew —— $39.95

The Fleshlight company has been around for a lone time. They make the legendary Fleshlight and Fleshjack. I’m the proud owner of my very own Fleshlight; it is my go-to toy for spankin the monkey. I never get tired of my Fleshlight and I wouldn’t give it up for the world. That’s way I wanted to review their new product: Sex In A Can.

I am of the mind that foolin’ around with or trying to improve on a great product, an icon even, will sure enough just fuck things up. I just couldn’t see why the Fleshlight people were tempting fate by bring out Sex In A Can. But I promised Dr Dick that I would set aside my preconceived ideas and approach this new product with an open mind.

Damn! I’ll be the first to admit, I was totally off base in thinking the iconic Fleshlight couldn’t be improved upon. Wait, improved is not the word I’m looking for, because Sex In A Can doesn’t really improve on the original design, it just gives the consumer yet another option.

Those of you familiar with Fleshlight will know that every customer can pretty much customize every aspect of the unit he wants to buy. They have several “orifice” options: pussy, mouth, asshole or “neutral”. The plastic case comes in silver, black or clear. The insert comes in different colors, and there are several different internal contours for the insert itself.

Sex In A Can is basically just another option in terms of size and shape. Here’s what I mean. Sex In A Can is shaped like a tallboy beer, instead of the traditional oversized Fleshlight shape. It is lighter, more compact, less expensive, yet it has all the features of its big brothers.

There are three brand new “orifice” options — two different pussies (Mmmm, pussies!) and a mouth. Three new insert contours too. Everything else — including the patented Superskin insert remains the same. The plastic case, the thing that looks like a tallboy beer, has removable caps at both ends, as does the Fleshlight. The top cap covers the head of the insert and keeps it clean when your dick’s not in it. The end cap can also be removed for easy cleaning.

Just like the Fleshlight, ya gotta loosen the end cap a bit before you attempt to stick in your dick. Sex In A Can is a whole lot tighter than my stalwart Fleshlight. In fact, bein the hefty-cock brother I am, it was a very tight squeeze. I had to use a shitload of lube just to get me started. Oh, and by the way, you can only use water-based lube with all the Fleshlight Superskin products. Here’s a tip: you adjust the suction created inside Sex In A Can by either loosening or tightening the base cap.

Clean up is a super-easy. A little soap and water will do the trick. But once the insert is dry, you have to dust it, inside and out, with a little cornstarch, or body powder. This will help keep things as fresh as the day you got it.

My Sex In A Can: Spread Eagle Brew, came with the Pink Spread Lady orifice; (Mmmm, pussies!) mini vortex insert; the cleverly designed beer can case; and sample packet of lube.

I like to soak my Superskin insert in warm water before I begin my stroke session. This makes the already flesh-like insert even more life-like. It’s totally awesome; it feels like the real thing.

One thing you should be aware of. There’s an off-gas that come from Sex In A Can when you first open it. This, I’m sorry to say, is an unfortunate by-product of manufacturing super soft rubbery things like the insert. It’s kind of like the same smell you get with a new carpet. Just let it air out for a while before you use it. Or you can just go ahead and wash the whole blasted thing before ya use, like I did. Which is a good practice for any new sex toy.

There’s no gettin around it,Sex In A Can is great.

Sex furniture? You betcha! Glenn & Hank walk you around this offering from the amazing folks at Liberator.
Liberator Ramp —— $200.00

Glenn: “Check this out! This is the best thing that’s happened to butt fuckin since the invention of the sling. The   Ramp is just one of Liberator’s many sex furniture shapes that are designed to add more fun and lessen bodily stress for whatever kind of sex you have up your sleeve.”
Hank: “Or down your pant leg, as the case may be. We got us a plus sized   Ramp and it is covered in black pleather. But you can choose from a bunch of sizes and fabric options.”

Glenn: “Pleather is great, because it cleans up fast. And that’s a big plus because our sessions can get pretty messy.”
Hank: “Ok, so what is the Liberator Ramp exactly and why is even better than a sling, or a swing for that matter? Good questions. The Liberator Ramp is a big triangular shaped, sturdy, comfy and solidly made cushion. Ours is 29” X 35” X 12”. And it can be used in a multitude of ways.”
Glenn: “It’s better than a sling or swing, because it’s portable, storable and you don’t have to suspend it from the ceiling, or set it up every time you want to shag. It does stow easily under the bed. It’s perfect for butt fuckin, because regardless of what position you like the Liberator Ramp is gonna make the sex a whole lot better for the top as well as the bottom.”
Hank: “Glenn likes it doggie style. I just bend him over the Ramp and plow away at his ass. It’s easier on me, because his ass is elevated to just the right position for the ass-ult. I can go as deep as possible, because his pelvis is supported by the Ramp. Oh, and ya can’t really do doggie style in a sling or swing!”
Glenn: “Hank is right! I don’t have to arch my back or strain my arms and wrists pressing back against his manly thrusts. But he can still grab my hair and pull.”
Hank: “You joke, but I know you love it deep and heavy. You’re just a dirty little piggy bottom, aren’t you?”
Glenn: “Oink, oink! I do enjoy a furious ride, that’s for damn sure. Ok, so if you want to do another position, all you do is reposition yourself on the Ramp for a little face-to-face action. Like I lay down on the Ramp, with my head at the lowest part of the incline. I scoot my butt to the highest edge of the incline.”
Hank: “Again, his ass is perfectly positioned for me to fuck him silly. With Glenn already angled down, I can lift and open his legs with ease.”
Glenn: “My toes are pointed to Jesus, and I’m in fuckin’ heaven.”
Hank: “Oh, the Ramp is great for cocksucking too. I just lay back on the Ramp, in the position Glenn just described, which elevates my hips 12” off the floor. Glenn has all the access he needs to my dick, balls and rosebud. He can service me till his heart’s content.”
Glenn: “Again, there no stress or strain on my neck or back while I blow him. And in this position Hank can grab his knees and pull open his own legs. PERFECT!”
Hank: “Could you live without a Ramp? I suppose you could; we did all these years. But now that we have this amazing piece of sex furniture, we’re thinking about adding other Liberator shapes to our collection. HINT, HINT; Liberator send us more of your products, please!”
Glenn: “I should probably add that the   Ramp was a big hit at a recent orgy we hosted. Everyone was fighting for their time on the Ramp. You know this thing is golden if it can satisfy a room full of sex-crazed queens.”
Hank: “The Ramp is a bit pricy, but it’s totally worth it. It’s beautifully made here in the good old US of A of high quality materials. It will last!”
Glenn: “I can promise you that it will enhance your sex life, as it has ours.”

Joy & Dixie have the pleasure of introducing you to a new kid on the block, Duncan Charles Designs. They specialize in unique, handcrafted ceramic adult toys.

Signature —— $55.00

Dixie: “Here’s something refreshing, this ceramic textured dildo is handmade! I’m so tired of mass-produced sex toys, aren’t you? Oh to have something unique, something that is crafted not manufactured.”
Joy: “Dixie is so right; I love knowing that no one else on the planet had precisely the same toy as we have. Each Duncan Charles Designs piece is unlike any other. In fact, it’s beautiful art. And it is GREEN!”
Dixie: “Signature has a food grade high-gloss coating that makes it as smooth as glass. But it is also textured, just the way we like it. Despite it being ceramic, there is nothing fussy about this beauty.”
Joy: “However, you will want to treat Signature with loving care, not because it’s fragile, but because it is a fine-looking sculpture.”
Dixie: “Signature comes wrapped in a lovely lined ultrasuede pouch. Ours is jet black, but it also comes in red. It’s just under 8″ long and weighs in at just over 8 ounces.”
Joy: “It has a rounded head on top of its scalloped shaft. The ridges add immeasurable fun. Because of the super high-gloss finish, we only had to use a little bit of lube. And you can use any type of lube you want with this ceramic baby.”

Dixie: “This dildo is designed for g-spot, clitoral or prostate massage. Unlike most of the other G-spot stimulators that have a curve to them Signature is straight as an arrow. And yet it is just as effective as the curved ones.”
Joy: “I also really like the fact that I can warm and chill the Signature to suit my mood. You can chill it in the refrigerator for a few minutes or warm it by placing it under running hot water.”
Dixie: “Clean up is easy with mild soap and warm water. You can also wipe it down with a lint-free towel moistened with peroxide, rubbing alcohol or a 10% bleach solution too. You can serialize it in boiling water for a minute or two, or pop it in the dishwasher with all your other fine china.”
Joy: “Signature is so inexpensive considering what you get. — it’s a unique, multi-functional dildo, it’s a work of art, and it will never run out of batteries.”
Dixie: “And, I might add, it’s GREEN. Kudos Duncan Charles Designs! Nothing to poison the environment or compromise your body’s health and wellbeing. In short, Signature rocks my (our) box!”

Finally, Madora, has something fun from Big Teaze Toys to show you.

Super Flower Power: 2 Piece Bouquet —— $29.99

Home; batteries included (triple A), YES! I love it when that happens. Inside there’s a bonus Flower Power keychain, a mini version of the vibe that looks like a little daisy without the stem, this one even comes with bonus extra batteries (the little watch kind), EXCELLENT!

My first impression is that the vibrating part, the center of the flower, is a little hard for me. At least for direct contact with my “flower”. The center of the flower is hard plastic. But I like the soft petals which spread the vibes out from its petals to yours. It’s like a gentle labia massage, which is cool and rare in a vibrator. These are especially nice if you use a little lube on the petals.

I’m starting to get used to the texture and hardness. I actually like it and like the strength of the vibe when I’m using it through my clothes, the barrier makes it not seem so hard and yet it’s still able to convey strong enough vibes right through to where they’re needed. I was thinking it could be fun for when you want to tease your partner right through her clothes. Did I mention these toys are waterproof?

All in all it definitely did the trick but when I really start to get into it, either with the vibe or the little keychain, the soft petal ring pops right off the vibrator. I either hafta kinda hold it on, or stop and put it back on, if I wanna keep playing with that part. So that’s a bummer.

The keychain has been a godsend. I’m on a trip right now and brought it with me and wasn’t concerned about security seeing it, It just looks like a toy. I ended up having cramps and everyone knows an orgasm is the best thing for cramps so I put it to use, you know, for medicinal purposes.

It’s small enough where it’s super discreet and even if you saw it your mind wouldn’t initially make the connection or the assumption that it’s a vibrator. It isn’t exactly super quiet, so I wouldn’t want to bust it out in a public bathroom or anything, but it’s certainly convenient. It’s only got one speed, and it’s pretty strong, again I prefer to use this one through my panties, because of it’s a hard texture.

In the end it made rainbows and smiley faces come out of me when I came, at least that’s what it felt like to me. It’s not my first pick but it’s fun and I’d love to use it in a photo shoot sometime.

ENJOY

October 2, 2009July 9, 2026

Luscious LELO, Our Conclusion

For the last seven months, the Dr Dick Review Crew has been reveling in the sensuous pleasures that are LELO. We’ve brought you 4 reviews so far — ELISE, BO, IRIS and GIGI

Today, we conclude our LELO presentation with three other amazing products. Review Crew Members: Kevin & Gina, Joy & Dixie and Brad do the honors.

ELLA —— $44.00

Kevin & Gina
Gina: “We kicked off the LELO reviews with our review of GIGI.”
Kevin: “So there’s some beautiful symmetry to us being part of the concluding reviews.”
Gina: “And speaking of symmetry we have the pleasure of introducing you to ELLA, another stunning pleasure object from the undisputed leader in adult products, LELO!”
Kevin: “ELLA is not a vibrator. It is, however, a beautifully sculpted insertable that is ideal for G-spot or P-spot stimulation.”
Gina: “And you can use either end! It’s like getting two toys in one.”
Kevin: “It comes in the famous LELO high-end packaging. It’s perfect for gift giving. But for those of us who appreciate minimal packaging, it can sometimes feel like over kill.”
Gina: “And because there is no vibration with this pleasure object, there’s no fussing with batteries or dubious recharge ports. Besides, I like the fact that I can be the instrument of my own bliss.”
Kevin: “It’s made of 100% seamless silicone. It is soft and velvety and beautiful to the touch. It’s approximately 7.25 inches long and 1.5 inches across at the widest point. Like Gina mentioned, ELLA can be inserted using either end. The curved tip is just like the GIGI. I LOVE IT!
Gina: “Because it is silicone, it cleans up is easy with mild soap and warm water. You can wipe it down with a lint-free towel moistened with hydrogen peroxide, rubbing alcohol or a 10% bleach solution too. If you’re going to share this toy, and I really think you should, you can serialize it in boiling water for a minute or two, or pop it in the top shelf of the dishwasher.”
Kevin: “I totally agree that you ought to share this toy. We all have a ‘spot’ of one sort or another — G or P, that is. Just insert the curved tip about two inches into your pussy or asshole, as the case may be, with the curve pointed towards the front of your body and rock the handle up and down. Oh baby, oh baby!”
Gina: “Kevin does not exaggerate. This is what I meant when I said I like being the instrument of my own bliss.”
Kevin: “If you’re more of a dildo kinda person, the other, long tapered end of ELLA will put a smile on your face.”
Gina: “Use it on yourself for solo play; use it on your partner for partnered play.”
Kevin: “And it’s not just a pleasure object; it’s also a therapeutic object. You can use this honey to do your Kegels with too. And all of us, men and women need to do those.”
Gina: “Of course, you can use only water-based lube with this beauty. And when you’re finished diddling yourself and/or your partner clean it and store it in the satin pouch thoughtfully provided by the good people at LELO.”
Kevin: “This is one of the more affordable LELO products. Beautiful styling and superior quality for under fifty bucks. You can’t beat that with a stick!”

Next up is BOB. We turn to Brad for his thoughts.

BOB —— $49.00

Brad
Hey, isn’t BOB and acronym for Big Old Bottom? That’s what Dr Dick keeps calling me! So ok, I’m a straight guy with a thing for his prostate. For years I couldn’t admit this to myself, let alone others. But nowadays I’m an out and proud butt pirate.

And as a personal trainer, I often find myself talking to my male clients about prostate health. Apparently, my straight clients find that information easier to take because I’m straight too. And I’ve been telling them about my BOB, you can count on that.

Anyhow, I’m like totally down with BOB, this stylish gentleman’s butt plug. If you’ve never tried a plug, this is the ideal starter size. It’s about 3” of insertable length and not much thicker than my thumb. It is easy to insert, even for the novice. And because its “plug” shaped it stays in place once inserted. BTW, you’ll want to use a water-based lube with this 100% silicone toy.

BOB is so comfortable, as well as being very stimulating, so you can wear it for hours. I do. People often ask me why I smile so much and why am so easy going. If they only knew I had BOB in my ass! I absolutely love saying that.

BOB has this ring on its base; this keeps it from going in too far and makes pulling it out of your ass a breeze. If you really want to treat yourself to a nice prostate massage, all ya do is use the ring to make thrusting and rocking motions. I can actually cum by massaging my prostate like this. I don’t even have to touch my dick.

LELO makes BOB affordable; it’s under $50. But you still get all the special LELO touches, like beautiful packaging and even a little satin pouch for safe keeping, when it’s not up your bum. Because it’s silicone its easy to clean with mild soap and warm water. You can wipe it down with a lint-free towel moistened with peroxide, rubbing alcohol or a 10% bleach solution too. You can serialize it in boiling water for a minute or two, or pop it in the dishwasher.

Dudes, if you still think that ass play, even by yourself is like all gay and stuff, you are totally missing out. Get a BOB and find out what I mean. And you’ll be on your way to some fine pleasure as well as some serious prostate health.

Finally there’s LUNA BEADS and for that review we turn to Joy & Dixie

LUNA BEADS —— $47.00

Joy & Dixie
Joy: “We’re glad to be back with everyone after having a couple months off. We were on an extended holiday and we missed all our toys at home while we were away.”
Dixie: “That’s not exactly true, we did take a couple of our favorite toys with us. One new one that we well talk about at another time, and the other was our delightful LUNA BEADS. They are very discreet and easy to pack. And they are both pleasurable and therapeutic.”
Joy: “LUNA BEADS are LELO’s take on a very old idea, Ben Wa Balls. You’ve heard of them, right? They were invented hundreds of years ago, to enhance female sexual stimulation and to exercise a woman’s PC muscles (pubococcygeus muscle). In other words, you do your Kegel exercises with these puppies.
Dixie: “Here’s a tip; the more Kegels you do, the more intense your orgasms are.”
Joy: “You simply insert the LUNA BEADS, each of which has an inner ball that creates the most amazing vibration sensation.”
Dixie: “The kit comes with two sets of silicone balls that pop in and out of a plastic girdle – one set is close to 30 grams and the other set is around 40 grams.”
Joy: “You can mix and match the weighted balls to build up your PC muscles. And you can wear these for hours, if you’d like. I know I like!”
Dixie: “Being made of silicone they are easy to sterilize, which makes the LUNA BEADS shareable. But for under $50 you may want your own set.”
Joy: “Dixie and I both like to masturbate with the LUNA BEADS. They deliver intense orgasms, because your muscles contract around the vibrating balls.”
Dixie: “You can say that again. And there’s never a need to change batteries or wait for a recharge. You can see why we took the LUNA BEADS on our vacation.”
Joy: “We completely endorse this product. They are both fun and healthful. We’ll never leave home without them.”
Dixie: “Given all the very expensive toys out there, including several of the other LELO products, one can’t go wrong plunking down your hard-earned money for a set of these.”
Joy: “Our friend, Karen, is about to give birth to her first child. We’re going to give her LUNA BEADS at the baby shower. No mother should be without!”

ENJOY!

June 19, 2009July 9, 2026

Double Trouble

Hey sex fans,

We’re back with Part 2 of our Simply Blown reviews. Did you somehow miss Part 1? Not to worry, you can see it HERE!

These exquisite glass insertables are museum quality. Each is a unique, sexy Objet d’Art.

Today Joy and Dixie present The Two Way

The Two Way

Joy: “First off, there is no way a photo on a website could ever capture the stunning beauty of The Two Way.”
Dixie: “That is so true! When either one or both of us aren’t enjoying The Two Way in the bedroom; it is proudly displayed on our mantelpiece on its own Plexiglas stand. Can ya stand it?”
Joy: “I actually prefer this in my pussy, or better yet as a double dong for both our pussies; but it is lovely on the mantel, that’s for damn sure.”
Dixie: “The Two Way is made of Pyrex glass. Ya know, that durable glass that daily takes a beating in your kitchen.”
Joy: “It’s a whooper too! It’s approximately 12” long x 1” diameter. It weighs a hefty 1lb 12.6 oz. It’s quite a handful. There is no texture to it; it’s totally smooth.”

Dixie: “Actually, it’s more than a handful. More than even two hands full.”

Joy: “And as I said, your can play with this solo, or make it a party for two. There is nothing gender specific about this; so boys can have a ball with this too!”
Dixie: “If you are unfamiliar with glass insertables, you should know that the market is currently being flooded with glass products. Very few of them are as fine a quality as The Two Way. The cheap knock-offs are being mass-produced in China. I’d avoid that stuff like the plague, if i were you. In this instance, you should expect to pay some real good money, $120+, for something top of the line like this.”
Joy: “Glass is like no other sex toy material. With just the tiniest amount of lube (we use a silicone-based lube) this thing becomes amazingly slick. And you can warm or chill this baby for added sensations.”
Dixie: “The Two Way, like all quality glass products, is easy to care for too. Warm soapy water and a nice lint-free towel is all you need for clean up. But you can pop it in the dishwasher; sterilize it in a 10% bleach solution; or dip it in boiling water for a couple of minutes. Because glass is non-porous, it is the ideal material for the toys one shares.”
Joy: “There is no base on The Two Way. That’s why it’s double trouble, if ya catch my drift. But it’s long enough and heavy enough so there won’t be any chance it could get stuck inside.”
Dixie: “Generally we are able include a retail price and a link to an online store with our reviews. Unfortunately, we can’t do that this week. The Two Way is so new a company that you’ll just have to contact them directly and ask for pricing.”

ENJOY

May 29, 2009July 5, 2026

Mixed Bag

Today we have several more products from Synergy Erotic. We reviewed a bunch of their products back in January — Vibe-Me Massager, Squirmy Touch-Me and Luscious Thrill-Her

This week’s Review Crew: Jack & Karen, Angie and Joy & Dixie

Angie has a bunny vibe to show us.
Elite Silicone Supple Bunny Lavender $54.45

Angie

There are a lot of things I really like about this 8 1/2 inch silicone bunny vibe. First and foremost, it’s silicone. Second, it’s waterproof. It’s modestly priced and it is attractive.

When I shop for a vibe for myself, I pretty much always choose silicone. And since I more often than not use the vibe in the tub, waterproof is at the top of my list of “must-haves”.

Bath time is my private time. And as often as possible I leisurely soak away the day’s tensions while my husband is busy preparing dinner in the kitchen. I know, I am so lucky and he’s such a treasure. I help myself to a glass of wine, fill the tub with a bubble bath and climb in. It is about the most hedonistic think I can think of, but it also keeps me sane.

The Elite Silicone Supple Bunny has an easy to use Polyurethane coated control unit in the handle. Even in a bubble bath it is easy to manipulate. That’s a big plus in my book. Who wants to struggle with slippery controls when things are just getting interesting just below the surface of the water.

It has a 2-speed vibrating bunny tickler that really delivers a substantial sustained vibration. This is by far the best part of the toy. There is also something that rotates clockwise and counter-clockwise beneath the silicone skin on the shaft. The head of the toy rotates slightly too, but these sensations are very subtle. Unfortunately, way too subtle for me. It’s the bunny tickler that is this device’s best stimulation feature.

Like all medical-grade silicone, it is hypoallergenic skin and phthalate free! It requires 4 AAA batteries. Sadly, batteries are not included, but at least the package is clearly marked with the battery size needed.

I recommend the Elite Silicone Supple Bunny.

Jack and Karen have a couple of vibes to report on.
Perfect Touch Satisfy-Her, Luster Black $19.99

Jack & Karen
Karen: “I love the design of the Perfect Touch Satisfy-Her. It’s shiny, it’s sleek, and I even liked the hard plastic. Sometimes I’m in the mood for something hard, if ya know what I mean. Unfortunately, I can’t say much for its performance.”
Jack: “It’s waterproof; you got to give it that.”
Karen: “Yes, that’s what it says. It’s also supposed to have a 5-speed vibrator that is controlled by a single button in the handle. I installed 2 AAA batteries (I had to use my own, because no batteries were included in the package).
Nothing I did make the vibe go through its paces. Pushing the button once got it going all right; nice vibration too. Pushing it again stopped the blasted thing. Pushing it a third time started it up again, but I couldn’t tell if it had changed speeds. I kept pushing the button never getting the same results twice. What, is this rocket science?”
Jack: “I could see she was having a problem, so I asked if I could take a look at it. I guess she was slightly more frustrated than I thought, because she flung the vibe in my direction.”
Karen: “Yeah, sorry about that. I don’t know why I let it get under my skin like that. I can tell you I would have been hoppin’ mad had I actually plunked down good money for this thing only to find, when I got it home, that it didn’t perform as advertised.”
Jack: “I guess there’s a lesson here for us all. If you’re paying less then 20 bucks for a molded plastic toy you’re liable to be disappointed. I mean, think about it. Maybe the old adage; ‘you get what you pay for’ applies in this instance.”
Karen: “We never even got around to testing it’s advertised waterproof capability. Oh well…”
Jack: “Moving right along.”

Wavy Touch Me Penis Pink $16.15

Jack & Karen
Jack: “This must not have been our week! After our less than happy experience with the Perfect Touch Satisfy-Her, we turned our hopes and expectations to the Wavy Touch Me.”
Karen: “DISAPPOINTED!”
Jack: “Here we have an 8 1/2 inch textured (wavy) dildo with what they call an Ultra-Gelle skin. Because of the articulated plastic spine beneath the skin, the dildo bends and then holds its shape. So far, so good.”
Karen: “We remember Glenn and Hank’s review of a similar product (HERE) and we were totally looking forward to our little adventure. The bending capability really appealed to me. I love G-spot stimulation and I thought this would deliver.”
Jack: “We never got beyond installing the 2 AA batteries. (Again, no batteries were included in the package.) Once the batteries were in place, I tightened the cap on the battery compartment and pushed the button on the base of the vibe to activate the blasted thing. NOTHING!”
Karen: “I said; ‘you’ve got to be kidding! Maybe you have the batteries in wrong.’”
Jack: “I thought, ok that could be it, although I’m not a complete dork. I do know how to install batteries. I loosened the cap on the battery compartment to check my installation when suddenly the thing sprang to life. WHAT?”
Karen: “I was really frustrated by this time. I wanted to get my groove on and all I got was…well nothing.”
Jack: “Apparently there is a flaw in either the design or the manufacture of this particular vibe. The contact points didn’t line up properly with the batteries when the cap was securely tightened. But once the cap was twisted open, the contact points hit the batteries and the vibe worked.”
Karen: “Of course, that put the kibosh on the whole ‘waterproof’ concept. D’oh!
I repeat what Jack said about the previous product; what can you expect for $16? Still had I shelled out the cash, I would have expected it to work, at least for a little bit.”
Jack: “By this point, I had had it too. We struck out twice this week. The Wavy Touch Me landed in the corner with the Perfect Touch Satisfy-Her never to be used again. We put the disappointment behind us and pulled out one of our trusty toys and went to work on our pleasure.”

Joy and Dixie have two bullet vibes to tell you about.Excite-Her Silver Bullet, Luster Pink $11.99

Joy & Dixie
Dixie: “We have some good news and some bad news.”
Joy: “We had two bullet vibes to test — Excite-Her Silver Bullet and Perfect Touch Excite-Her Mega Silver Bullet. One was great, the other…not so much.”
Dixie: “First the good news. The Excite-Her Silver Bullet was very nice. It has two speeds; a single button control mechanism, which worked just fine; and it’s waterproof. What’s not to like, right?”
Joy: “It’s an oversized bullet that really delivers the vibration. You can use it externally, or internally — vaginally or anally. Although, I must say, I don’t know if I trust the wire that attaches to the bullet to withstand a tug past a tight anal sphincter. So you’re will want to take care in that respect, because the bullet will insert easily enough. It’s the getting it out that might be a problem.”
Dixie: “And I want to point out that the bullet itself is the only thing that is waterproof. The hand-held controller/battery case is definitely not waterproof.”
Joy: “The Excite-Her Silver Bullet runs on two AA batteries. And like all the toys from this company, the first set of batteries is not included in the package.
Dixie: “We recommend this vibe.”

Perfect Touch Excite-Her Mega Silver Bullet $13.99

Joy & Dixie
Dixie: “Now for the bad news.”
Joy: “As you know, we had these two bullet vibes to test — Excite-Her Silver Bullet and Perfect Touch Excite-Her Mega Silver Bullet. One was great, the other…not so much.”
Dixie: “We liked the Excite-Her Silver Bullet, it was very nice.”
Joy: “The Perfect Touch Excite-Her Mega Silver Bullet is another story. It too is an oversized bullet vibe, bigger even than the Excite-Her. I loved the size of the bullet; the bigger the better for my vaginal insertions, thank you very much!”
Dixie: “And like it’s smaller sibling, this vibe is also waterproof. But again I want to point out that the bullet itself is the only thing that is waterproof. The hand-held controller/battery case is definitely not waterproof.”
Joy: “And that gets us to the problem with this vibe. The power-pack sucks, and not in a good way.”
Dixie: “Yeppers, Joy’s right. I mean the concept is a good one — it has a varying speed dial on the side of the hand-held power-pack that is supposed to adjust the vibe speed incrementally, like a rheostat on a light switch.”
Joy: “If the manufacturer had pulled this off, the Perfect Touch Excite-Her Mega Silver Bullet would rock — big bullet and varying speed. Sadly, the rheostat thingy is made really cheaply and so it really doesn’t work. It turns on ok, but dialing the speed up or down just made the vibe sputter. BUMMER!”
Dixie: “The Mega Silver Bullet runs on three AA batteries. And like all the toys from this company, the first set of batteries is not included in the package.
Joy: “We cannot recommend this vibe. We do, however, have a few words of advice for the Synergy Erotic people. Why not invest more in the production values of your products and make a name for yourself in terms of quality, not price per unit. We’d be willing to pay considerably more for a vibe, like this, that actually worked as advertised.”
Dixie: “What’s the use of spending a mere $16 for a toy that will wind up in the trash in no time. It’s a shameful waste, if you ask me.”

ENJOY!

December 12, 2008July 1, 2026

Rest Ye Merry Gentlemen…and Gentlewomen

REVIEW #28

Hey sex fans,

It’s Week 4, and the final week, of our Holiday Extravaganza. Did you somehow miss Week 1, 2 or 3 of this lollapalooza? Shame on you! Check out Reviews #25, 26 and 27. You’ll be so glad ya did.

The Dr Dick Review Crew has been workin’ overtime gettin you these reviews and now all our naughty parts are sore as all get out. Thank god this is the last week; we need a break, don’t cha know!

This week’s Review Crew include:

Jack & Karen — Reviews #17, 18, 25, 27
Joy & Dixie— Reviews #6, 12, 16, 17, 18, 23, 27
Glenn & Hank — Reviews #4, 16, 17, 18, 23. 24, 27
Gina & Kevin — Reviews #4, 13, 16, 17, 18, 23, 24, 27
Ken & Denise — Reviews #11, 16, 25
Jada — Reviews #14, 16, 20

First up Ken & Denise introduce us to a beautiful wooden insertable from Hans at Hardwood Dildos. I’m a big fan of Hans’. He is more than a craftsman; he’s an artist. He really knows his wood and his woodies! We have just this one dildo to review, but his site is virtually overflowing with ingenious designs. When you visit, be sure to tell him Dr Dick sent you.

Apple Wood Dildo $99

Ken: “I was hoping I would be one of the lucky chosen ones to review one of the great wooden dildos we’ve featured during our Holiday Extravaganza. I lucked out! Denise and I have a real beauty.”
Denise: “That is so true. Unfortunately, our Apple Wood Dildo doesn’t come already named, like the ones reviewed earlier in this series.”
Ken: “Well, it’s only unfortunate if you’re not clever enough to come up with name all on your own. I’ve christened ours Peter…for obvious reasons.”
Denise: “I stand corrected. Maybe I need to be punished. 😉
Ken: “You’d like that, wouldn’t you? Just you wait till we get home, young lady!”
Denise: “Ohhh, Daddy!”
Ken: “We seem to be veering off topic. Back to our beautiful Hardwood Dildo. It is made of Apple wood, a fine-grained, dense wood, which has a very fair color, kinda like maple or cherry. Apparently, the wood comes from trees pruned in Oregon.”
Denise: “Hardwood Dildos is another brilliant GREEN northwest company; so hurray for that! It also has a very traditional shape to it. Unlike some of the other wooden insertables on the market, there is no denying this Apple Wood Dildo is a phallus. It’s 6.25″ x 1.6″/2.6″ with a luscious dickhead and a nice base for easy handling.”
Ken: “That phallus shape suits us just fine, huh honey?”
Denise: “You betcha! I’m real old fashioned gal that way. I love the way it feel in my pussy and my ass.”
Ken: “You can use all kinds of lube with this Hardwood Dildo. It warms nicely to your body very quickly too.”
Denise: “Wash with warm soapy water and dry thoroughly with a soft cloth and you’re done. You can wipe it down with a lint-free towel moistened with peroxide, rubbing alcohol or a 10% bleach solution too.”
Ken: “I feel like I own a unique piece of art, because no two Hardwood Dildos are alike.”
Denise: “And anyone concerned about the finish on these dildos; oughtn’t worry. They get at least five coats of a food grade varnish called a Salad Bowl Finish.”
Ken: “If you are looking for wood (literally or figuratively) Hardwood Dildos is the place to shop.”
Denise: “I hope I find another one of these beauties under my tree this Christmas.”
Ken: “Maybe you could take your tree to Hans after the holidays and have him whip up a little something for you.”
Denise: “What a great idea! I wonder if he does requests. Happy Holidays everyone.”

Gina & Kevin introduce us to a couple of lovable toys for the big kid in all of us. These come from the good people at Big Teaze Toys. Dr Dick gives a bunch of extra points for the delightful names. You go Big Teaze!

I Rub My Duckie Bondage $25.99

Gina: “If a company can make me smile and make me cum at the same time, they win my heart. Now my heart belongs to Big Teaze. I Rub My Duckie Bondage is just one of the great Collector’s Series duckies available from Big Teaze Toys. You have to see the other! Makes me giggle just visiting the site.”
Kevin: “I got such a kick out of this. And speaking of kicks; this little bugger is mighty powerful.”
Gina: “Bondage Duckie has a permanent place in our bathroom. It is always in reach. There is nothing better than a waterproof vibe. I love to get off in the tub.”
Kevin: “It’s a real conversation piece too. It even comes with its own set of Duckie-sized handcuffs. What a hoot! Guests always comment on our fashionable BDSM Duckie. Little do they know.”
Gina: “When Kevin and I enjoy a soak together we never forget to invite Duckie. And you can use it several different ways. But I think you should find that out on your own.”
Kevin: “Batteries ARE included. So your first rides are free!”

I Rub My Wormie Pink Travel Size $22.99

Kevin: “The I Rub My Wormie we have is the travel sized one. That makes is a bit smaller than the regular size. It make an excellent butt plug.”
Gina: “Or Pussy plug! I Rub My Wormie has a, ergonomic bend in his neck to reach your G- or P-spot. It has an easy-grip body so he won’t wiggle out of your hands.”
Kevin: “Oh baby, Oh baby, you make me so hot!! Don’t forget the 3-speeds of vibration.”
Gina: “It actually is the perfect toy to travel with. Airport security will think you are carrying a baby’s toy. If they only knew.
Kevin: “All you health conscious consumers out there should know these toys are non-toxic, Phthalate-free, PVC-free and latex-free.”
Gina: “Sadly, I Rub My Wormie does not come with batteries. What’s up with that Big Teaze Toys? No one should be creating battery operated toys without including the fist set of batteries. It’s just wrong.
Kevin: “Gina and I agree these toys make ideal holiday gifts. Just make sure if you plan to give one of these as a gift that you buy the toy with the batteries, or include the batteries as part of your gift.”
Gina: “No one wants a toy that can’t be used right out of the package.”
Kevin: “Merry Christmas and Happy Holidays from both of us.”
Gina: “And a Happy orgasm-filled New Year too!”

Now Jada gives us the finger, as it were. This is a clever first offering from a new Canadian company — Fun To Have.

Fun Finger $20.00

Jada: At first I thought this was some kind of gag. I mean Fun Finger looks like something you’d find on one of those prank websites. It’s basically a big golden thumb. Fun Finger is soft and flexible. It has a multi-speed vibrator that is adjusted on the base of the finger. It’s made in China of TPR (Thermoplastic Rubber), which is non-toxic, but anyone allergic to latex will not be able use this. I’m not a big fan of Chinese made products, especially nowadays, but this one seems harmless enough.

I did like the unique shape — the cocked thumb. It’s perfect for G-spot stimulation. I wouldn’t, however, recommend it for prostate stimulation. There’s nothing to hold on to at the base and it could easily slip in your bum and disappear. And that would very unpleasant indeed.

Fun Finger would make a fun stocking stuffer for the light-hearted person on your list.

Happy holidays everyone!

Our favorite perv Review Crew members — Joy & Dixie and Glenn & Hank tackle some very interesting devices from Rachel’s Pleasures.

G–Spotter $16.20

Joy & Dixie

Dixie: “This is our second go around with these sorts of products. Joy and I, Glenn and Hank and others did a whole series on some of the products from Sportsheets. You can find those reviews by searching for the word ‘Sportsheets’.”
Joy: “Dixie and I prefer Rachel’s product line to the other. For one thing, we found them more comfortable.”
Dixie: “I hope this doesn’t sound petty, but we also like Rachel’s packaging better. It’s more fun and it isn’t so blatantly heterosexual.”
Joy: “Basically, the G–Spotter is a device that one attaches to the bottom’s ankles so the top can maneuver the bottom’s legs with more ease. The bottom can hold the strap herself or the top can hold it and move it from side to side.”
Dixie: “I liked the Cumfy Cuffs. They are padded for comfort, quick release gismo that is real handy. The G–Spotter is also easily adjustable.”

Cumfy Cuffs And Cumfy Cuffs Extensions Kit $22.50

Glenn & Hank

Glenn: “Hank and I agree with Dixie. We also like Rachel’s packaging better than the Sportsheets packaging. I guess it’s a gay thing!”
Hank: “In fact, we liked everything about the Rachel’s line better. We agree with the gals, it’s a more comfortable setup”
Glenn: “Not that the bottom is supposed to be comfortable all the time. If ya catch my drift.”
Hank: “Yeah, but Rachel’s line of products, although practical and fully functional, is geared toward the bondage novice, wouldn’t you agree?”
Glenn: “Absolutely! But we all have to start somewhere.” 😉
Hank: “Do you know a budding kinkster? Maybe you’re one yourself.
Glenn: “Maybe you’d just like to know the thrill of relinquishing control for an itsy bitsy moment or two.”

Neoprene Harness $24.30

Joy & Dixie introduce us to the Neoprene Harness.

Joy: “Now this is something I can really sink my teeth into.”
Dixie: “What she means to say is ‘…sink a nice big dildo into’.”
Joy: “I loves me my strap-ons! I have quite a collection. Some are more comfortable than others, but I love ‘em all.”
Dixie: “I’m not as much of a connoisseur, as Joy, but this Neoprene Harness is very comfortable, I must say.”
Joy: “It is that! It is also reversible and machine washable. I love that part. I hate having to clean lube and whatnot off my leather harness.”
Dixie: “It’s also fully adjustable. It would have to be to fit both Joy and I. We have such different body types.”
Joy: “This is a really terrific start-out harness for the beginner. It’s inexpensive, yet practical. You just plug in the insertable of your choice (like the one that Ken & Denise showed us earlier) and then go fuck yourself some…whatever.”
Dixie: “Exactly! I’ve already told my ‘straight’ office mate about this. She’s gonna surprise her BF for X-mas.”
Joy: “You go, Danna!! Give it to him good.”
Dixie: “Thank you Dr Dick for a great year of products. We certainly look forward to the New Year and what it may bring.”
Joy: “Have a very sexy and sensual holiday season everyone. See ya in the New Year.”

Rachel’s Bed Spread (w/cuffs) $64.53

Glenn & Hank

Hank: “Now this is more like it! Rachel’s Bed Spread allows you can create a little bondage magic without the screw anchors and bolts in the ceiling and walls needed for more traditional bondage apparatus.”

Glenn: “I love being restrained spread eagle on the bed. I love relinquishing control to my partner(s) and being ravaged by him/them.”

Hank: “And now we can play like this our own bedroom, or take it on vacation with us.”

Glenn: “These two straps go around the mattress and allow us to attach wrist or ankle cuffs to the straps. The straps are adjustable fitting a twin up to a King Size bed

Hank: “Rachel’s Bed Spread is not the least be threatening. In fact, if you just wanna mess around with some power-play this is just the thing for you.”

Glenn: “But it also works for those of us who are a tad more hardcore.”

Hank: “And it’s a breeze to set up. It only took a few minutes.”

Glenn: “And it’s reasonably priced.”

Hank: “So if you are a rank amateur or a seasoned pro, you’ll have a great time testing your limits. We did!”

Glenn: “We think Rachel’s Pleasures rocks.”

Hank: “We both wish you a Merry Christmas and a very edgy New Year.”

So there ya have it, Sex Fans. We hope our Holiday Extravaganza provided you with lot of swell gift giving ideas. Look for more Product Reviews in the New Year.

December 5, 2008July 1, 2026

Fa la la la la, La la la la

REVIEW #27

Hey sex fans,

Holy mackerel! It’s Week 3 of our Holiday Extravaganza. Did you somehow miss Week 1 or 2 of this lollapalooza? Shame on you! Check out Reviews #25 and 26. You’ll be so glad ya did.

The Dr Dick Review Crew has our review apparatus workin’ overtime. We want to get as many reviews out there before the end of the year. Because we certainly don’t want to leave you hanging…as it were. This week, we have yet another hot juicy load of swell holiday gift giving ideas for you. And guess what? They are all GREEN.

This week’s Review Crew include:

Jack & Karen — Reviews #17, 18, 25

Joy & Dixie— Reviews #6, 12, 16, 17, 18, 23

Me, Dr Dick — Reviews #1 – 5, 7 – 10, 12, 14, 15, 19, 21, 25, 26

Glenn & Hank — Reviews #4, 16, 17, 18, 23. 24

Gina & Kevin — Reviews #4, 13, 16, 17, 18, 23, 24

First up we have two brilliant wooden insertables from my very good friends at Jildos; The Art You Love To Touch! Jildos are American made, hand-crafted works of art. They are produced by a company called: WoodPeckers Roost. Can you stand it? They are made from the most durable, safe materials available and they are GREEN, oh so GREEN.

Hart $69.00

Joy & Dixie

Joy: “I’ve had a hankerin’ for a wooden dildo for ages. I’ve admired them online and even held a few in my hands at our local sex emporium. But nothing compares to owing one and having it inside you.”
Dixie: “That is so true. Hart is simply beautiful. It’s made of exotic Bocote wood, which gives it a very distinctive striped appearance. And besides it’s beauty it is as functional as all get-out. It has a long, smooth shaft that allows you to enjoy deep penetration using either end.”
Joy: “Yeah, and it’s a ‘double header’ too. There is a ball at one end that is ideal for G-spot (or P-spot) stimulation. But it also has a more traditional head on the other end, which is followed by 4 ridges. I love my dildos ridged!”
Dixie: “I agree, I love the rippling sensation too. And I like that it’s size is not overwhelming. It’s 10.5” long, but it’s only 1.25” in diameter at its widest point.”
Joy: “We spent a lot of time trying it every which way. And it is safe to use with all kinds of lubes. We are partial to silicone-based lubes and because Hart is so naturally smooth, a very little bit of lube goes a long way.”
Dixie: “Caring for this beauty is blissfully simple. Wash with warm soapy water and dry thoroughly with a soft cloth. You can also wipe it down with a lint-free towel moistened with peroxide, rubbing alcohol or a 10% bleach solution.”
Joy: “Then you can use the wax packet provided with Hart to restore it’s natural luster. Just rub it on and buff it off.”
Dixie: “Your Jildo Dildo will come with a Certificate of Authenticity and a nice velvet pouch for discreet storage.”
Joy: “Jildos has a wide array of shapes and styles to choose from. This is the ideal holiday gift for the GREEN consumer.”

Whimsy $69.00

Glenn & Hank

Hank: “We have a more manly sized Jildo Dildo. Then do the girls.”
Glenn: “I just love that name! ‘Honey, can you please pass the Jildo Dildo?’”
Hank: “I know, and we don’t even have to christen this one, because it comes with its own name — Whimsy.”
Glenn: “It’s a nice 1.5” wide and a bit shorter, at 10”, than Joy & Dixie’s Hart.”
Hank: “I don’s suppose we have to repeat all the stuff that the girls said about lube, care and cleaning and all, do we? Good!”
Glenn: “Yeah, but we should describe it better.”
Hank: “Oh, ok! It’s made of American Cherry wood.”
Glenn: “Think of it as cherry pie on a stick.”
Hank: “You are such a dork!”
Glenn: “You love it!”
Hank: “Our Whimsy is also a ‘double header’. One end is rounded. Think prostate stimulation…or G-spot stimulation. The other end is bullet shaped. There’s a combination of swirls and ridges, which deliver a variety of sensations with the old in and out.”
Glenn: “Mmmm, in and out!”
Hank: “Have you ever met a hornier bastard?”
Glenn: “I’m an unapologetic power bottom; what can I say? And when Hank works my ass with Whimsy, I’m in pig heaven. And this thing warms to my body very fast. It’s like totally awesome.”
Hank: “He’s so right. I can work this boy in to a froth of sexual frenzy with this thing. And I like that it’s very masculine looking. Despite it’s beauty, it doesn’t look out of place next to all of Glenn’s other insertables.”
Glenn: “And I do have quite a collection. At the same time, we could leave this on the coffee table as an object ‘d art for all to admire.
Hank: “If you’re lookin’ for insertable art for your holiday giving, look no further than a stunning Jildo Dildo.”
Glenn: “One final thing. You absolutely have to check out their dildo lore page. It is amazing.

Keeping with today’s GREEN theme we’ve got a couple of delicious products from a little company in Vancouver, BC called Hathor Aphrodisia.

Lubricant Pure 4 oz $18.00 CAD

I, Dr Dick, have the distinct pleasure of introducing you to Lubricant Pure. I am so fond of this mighty-mite of a company from right here in the beautiful Pacific Northwest. What a joy it is to bring their products to your attention.

Ya’ll know my passion for GREEN adult products, right? Hathor Aphrodisia is a boutique company that brings us only a few choice products, but each one is a work of love.

Lubricant Pure is an exceptionally fine personal lube. It contains pure botanical emollients including Horny Goat Weed, Jujube Zizyphus and Siberian Ginseng, which are supposed to have aphrodisiacal properties. Can’t honestly say I noticed any difference in my sexual response cycle. But as my granny used to say, ‘It couldn’t hurt!’

Lubricant Pure is water-based, so it’s condom compatible. It’s slippery, non-sticky and there’s no fragrance, which really appealed to me. I hate when lubes have an odor.

And as you would guess from a company like this, Lubricant Pure even tastes nice. I mean don’t you just hate getting some lubes in your mouth? I know I do. They taste all chemically?

Sex fans, if you want your sex to be GREEN? Here’s a way to do that and support a fantastic little company that is doing the right thing.

Lubricant Pure makes a great stocking stuffer too.

Lubricant Lickeurs — Coconut Orange 4 oz $22.00 CAD

Lubricant Lickeurs — Coconut Orange 4 oz $22.00 CAD

Gina & Kevin

Karen: “This is so cool. I’m a big tea drinker. Never been one for coffee, but I do know my teas. And since I’m a naturally hyper kinda gal, I try to avoid caffeine as much as possible. These teas are delicious and they are herbal.”

Jack: “I, on the other hand, am not a big tea drinker, but I agree; these teas are good. There’s an earthiness to them that I really liked.

Karen: “First up today is My Maple Cookie. I love it; what a name. This tea is a unique blend of premium herbs specially formulated to change the female genitalia and male semen to smell and taste like maple cookies. How fun is that?”

Jack: “Who would have guessed something like this was even possible. I have to admit, it’s the damnedest thing. Karen and I shared the tin of 12 tea bags over a 10 day period. We both noticed a difference in the way we smelled and tasted. Don’t get me wrong; I love the natural taste of she and me, but this is way fun.”

Karen: “Jack’s right. Although, I sometimes find his cum to be kind of acrid. My Maple Cookie

Jack: “I like the taste of my own jizz. I never find it acrid. But I don’t taste it every day. So I bow to Karen’s critique.”

Karen: “The Intimate Teas website suggests pouring 8 ounces of hot water over a tea bag and let steep for 5 minutes. Then gently squeeze the tea bag to let the active ingredients fully release into the water. You may remove tea bag or allow to stay in water for stronger tea.”

Jack: “This tea is not a miracle worker. It won’t cover a multitude of sins. Hell, even I know to avoid some foods like onions and garlic, a lot of booze and, of course, smoking, if you want your spunk to taste sweeter.” changed that in just two days.To continue this week’s GREEN, and I might add YUMMY, theme we veer toward the food end of the spectrum.

Jack: “Next up we have Screaming O tea. The Intimate Teas people get high marks for the clever names and the packaging.”
Karen: “They sure enough do! This tea is a premium blend of unique herbs made to increase sexual passion in both women and men. It is supposed to be an aphrodisiac, sexual stimulant and it’s supposed to intensify orgasms.”
Jack: “That’s what it says on the website. I was dubious…at first. I figured, I already have intense orgasms, do I really need to improve on that…even if it’s possible?”
Karen: “Things are much different for us gals, but I think you know that already. I felt like the tea really did stimulate me. And maybe it was only wishful thinking, but I felt my orgasms intensified too.”
Jack: “Again, I defer to my lovely wife. One thing for sure; this tea is a stimulant. The first time I had this tea was near bedtime. I thought, a nice cup of warm tea will make me sleep like a baby. NOT! I tossed and turned all night long. But I did have a raging boner in the morning. I don’t know if those two thing are connected, but they did follow one after the other.”
Karen: “Kevin and I split the 12 tea bags between us, like the My Maple Cookie tea. I didn’t drink my tea at bedtime, so I couldn’t corroborate Kevin’s story.”
Jack: “I say, if you’re feelin’ a little pookie in the libido department, give this tea a try. I suspect you will be pleasantly surprised.
Karen: “That goes double for the women in our audience. And these teas come in these charming little tins. They make perfect gifts any time of the year, but especially during the holidays.”

October 31, 2008July 1, 2026

I’m Shocked! —— Part 2

REVIEW #23

Hey sex fans,

We’re back with Part 2 in this series that will focus on the exceptional products from the pervy and oh so edgy folks at Paradise Electro Stimulations, PES.

Last week, as you recall, the Dr Dick Review Crew and I introduced you to the concept of Erotic Electro Stimulation in general and the PES Power Box in particular. If you somehow missed this important first part of our presentation, look for Review #22.

This week the Review Crew will introduce you to some of the PES Electrodes that attach to the PES Power Box. These are the thingies and that actually deliver the stimulation. You’ll notice that some of these products are gender specific, others are can be used by either sex.

This week’s Review Crew include:

Glenn & Hank — Reviews #4, 16, 17, 18
Gina & Kevin — Reviews #4, 13, 16, 17, 18
Joy & Dixie— Reviews #6, 12, 16, 17, 18

Joy & Dixie introduce us to the newly redesigned PES Vaginal Plug. It directs the flow of Erotic Electro Stimulating current right inside your pussy. You lucky Ladies! All us pussy-less folk can only guess at the bliss we’re missing. By the way, neither Joy nor Dixie had ever played with Erotic Electro Stimulation before.

PES Vaginal Plug (C066) $190.00

Joy: “This plug has two conductive surfaces, one on each side of the beautifully sleek acrylic shaft. We discovered that the plug works best when fully inserted in my pussy before we turned on the Power Box.“
Dixie: “Also, be aware that shifting the plug once it’s in place will redirect the stimulation, which just makes sense, right?”

(Like we learned last week, it’s always advisable to lower power levels before shifting the position of any of the PES Electrodes. And when adjusting the levels, the higher the pulse and frequency, the more intense the stimulation.)

Joy: “Once I inserted the plug and took a few deep breaths to relax, I slowly began to adjust the pulse and frequency knobs upward. I began to feel involuntary muscle contractions inside my pussy. This was a totally new sensation for me. It was completely unlike what I experience with an insertable vibrator. In record time I had my first orgasm. I was like, ‘holy shit, I am in love!”
Dixie: “It was so amazing to watch. Joy didn’t do a thing, but lean back against a pillow and manipulate the knobs on the Power Box. The PES Vaginal Plug did all the work. When Joy uses one of her dildos, even one of the vibrating ones, she always has to manually pump it in and out.”
Joy: “I can safely say that this was my very first hands-free orgasm ever. It was completely effortless. I could feel the electro stimulation in my clit too. It was totally wild. Like Dixie said, it wasn’t friction that was causing the sensations, because there was no in and out movement. Over the next 15 or 20 minutes I had multiple orgasms. But there was none of that ‘raw’ feeling in my pussy afterward, like I often get when I use my vibes.”
Dixie: “I was way more nervous about using this thing than Joy. I had to talk myself down from connecting the dots, as it were. Here is this thing, the Power Box plugged into an outlet in the wall and wires from it were attached to the Vaginal Plug. And that was now inside my cunt. Good thing Joy went first, or I wouldn’t have been able to get past the whole electrocution scene playing out in my head. Joy held my hand and I adjusted the knobs on the Power Box. It was such an unfamiliar sensation that it took me a while to decide if I liked it or not. I did notice that adjusting the Vaginal Plug placement and depth in my cunt stimulated different nerve paths, which produced a variety of sensations. Once I could relax and give myself the space to experience the tingly feelings, I too had a whopper of an orgasm. Relaxation is key, at least at first.”
Joy: “There a round opening in the base that allows access to one’s clit for manual stimulation. Not that I needed that necessarily. It also comes with these dainty latex straps to hold the thing in place. Dixie like the straps more than I did.”
Dixie: “Lubrication is a must! I mean, that seems obvious but lube is important for more than just making insertion easier. It also plays an essential role in the effectiveness of the electrode. We used ElectroLube; and recommend it highly.”
Joy: “We both realize that these are very expensive toys, but boy are they worth it.”
Dixie: “Getting past the wires was more difficult for me. But I agree with Joy, this is amazing stuff.”

Glenn & Hank introduce us to the PES Acrylic Anal Plug. It directs the flow of Erotic Electro Stimulating current right inside your ass. Since we all have an asshole, none of us will be left wondering what we’re missing, just because we don’t have the right parts. Hank and Glenn have a limited amount of experience with e-stim. They use Electro Stimulation as part of their BDSM play.

PES Acrylic Anal Plug (C072) $150.00

Glenn: “The PES Electro Anal Plug is beautiful. It’s a smooth acrylic plug with conductive surfaces on either side. These stimulate your sphincter muscle, prostate and all up inside your hole. If you’re a bottom, you’re gonna love this shit.”
Hank: “He knows of what he speaks!
Glenn: “Unlike Joy and Dixie, me and Hank like it nasty.
Hank: “The nastier the better.”
Glenn: “Like all butt plugs, the PES Electro Anal Plug slips in your ass allowing your sphincter to close down around the notch in the plug keeping the puppy in place.”
Hank: “Glenn’s got the tightest ass of any power bottom I’ve ever known. Must be all those kegels. When he clamps down on my fingers, it’s enough to snap ‘em in two.”
Glenn: “Awww shucks, you say the sweetest things, babe.”
Hank: “We want to reinforce everything that Dixie and Joy said about the importance of lube. Not only for insertion purposes but to ass-ist in conductivity.”
Glenn: “So I’m in the sling at our bud’s dungeon. Hank and our friend, Tad, are workin’ me over real good with some fine rope work. I have a gag in my mouth.”
Hank: “That gag provides me the only peace I get all week.”
Glenn: “BITCH! Anyhow, as I was saying before I was so rudely interrupted, I have a gag in my mouth and a hood over my head and some weights on my balls. The paddle stings. The cane raises little welts on my glues. It hurts like hell and I’m in heaven.”
Hank: “Then comes the ass ass-ult. We lube up Glenn’s ass and the Electro Anal Plug and drive it home. This is not a super-sized plug by any means, but it doesn’t have to be.”
Glenn: “Hee haw! Slap me and call me names.”
Hank: “Glenn is such a pain pig. Tad and I add a blindfold, check the ropes and give Glenn the juice.”
Glenn: “I can’t feel anything but the sensations in my ass. I buck as much as I can with pain/pleasure. My ass is on fire, but I still clamp my sphincter down on the plug for extra measure.”
Hank: “Precum dribbles from his cock. He writhes as he rides the edge. Bubbles of saliva encircle the ball gag. There’s a grimace on his face. Finally, he raises his middle finger in a “fuck you” salute and we shut down the Power Box.”
Glenn: “When I’m gagged the “fuck you” salute is my safe word, or better my safe gesture. Twenty minutes of this and I am completely spent. I don’t even need to cum, I am that satisfied.”

Hank & Glenn introduce us to the PES Corona Stimulator. It’s one three corona focused PES Electrodes that target the Erotic Electro Stimulation to a your cockhead. Pity the dick-less among us who’ll never know the ecstasy of this kind of erotic charge.

PES Corona Stimulator (C082) $79.00

Hank: “While Glenn was taking a smoke break over in the corner. Tad and I had the Power Box to ourselves. I was eager to try the PES Corona Stimulator.”
Glenn: “I’m actually surprised Hank was up for this. I’m the edgy pervert one in the family.
Hank: “Part of being on the Review Crew is expanding our limits, right? And I’m into my dick the way Glenn is into his ass. That’s why the PES Corona Stimulator interested me. So I thought I would take it for a little test drive.
Glenn: “This, of course, aroused my attention right away. Hank has the most beautiful, big, fat uncut dick in town. I get all moist just seein it flop around when he’s strollin’ around the house in the buff. So I mozied on over to where Tad and he are hookin’ him up to PES Corona Stimulator.”
Hank: “I skinned back my foreskin and slipped the electrode over my dickhead. I confess to being a little nervous, which actually turned out to be a good thing. It would have been really uncomfortable trying to slip the head of my cock into this thing if I was hard.”
Glenn: “I told you he had a big dick.”
Hank: “I adjusted the PES Corona Stimulator
Glenn: “Ya gotta use a lot of lube for this.”
Hank: “I used the Corona Stimulator with the Tubular Mid-Ring, which promised to pretty much carry the stimulation through my entire shaft. Once I had everything in place and wired up I was ready to go for it.
Glenn: “Hank was still a little tentative, so I decided to put on a little show for him. I got down on my knees and started to deep throat Tad’s meat. This got Hank’s dick to swell.”
Hank: “I really couldn’t jerk myself, like I normally would, so I started to fiddle with the knobs on the Power Box. I began to feel a tingle as I tuned up the juice. In moments I was rock hard. The sensations were incredible. Before that night I had never experienced a “hands free” orgasm. It was fuckin fantastic. I thought I was gonna cum my guts out.
Glenn: “It was pretty, alright.
Hank: “Here’s a tip: be sure shave any hair you might have off your shaft. You don’t want hot spots, so that the top part laid over my piss slit. The ring goes around the head and connection doohickey hits me at my frenulum.”

Gina & Kevin introduce us to the PES Electro-Flex Anal Plug. It directs the flow of Erotic Electro Stimulating current right inside your ass. Again, since we all have an asshole, none of us have to miss out on all the fun just because we don’t have the right parts. Kevin and Gina are e-stim virgins.

PES Electro-Flex Anal Plug (C071) $196.00

Gina: “Look everybody, we’re back with yet another butt toy for my sweet little Kevie’s booty.”
Kevin: “It does look like I’m getting all the attention, huh?
Gina: “It’s ok, because this Electro stuff scares me. I mean I know it’s safe and all, but like Dixie I have this natural aversion to wires and my private parts. I admit; I’m old fashioned that way.”
Kevin: “LOL! Yeah she’s just like the gal that married dear old dad. NOT!”
Gina: “Shut up!”
Kevin: “Moving right along, the PES Electro-Flex Anal Plug
Gina: “I have to admit; it is pretty harmless looking. And it’s flexible to a degree. You can even bend it a bit to an angle and it will hold its shape. I would consider using it myself, as a pussy plug, but not with it plugged in.”
Kevin: “The plug has two separate electro pads, neither one is as obvious as Glenn’s. Both are positioned on the plug to stimulate precise areas. One pad runs the entire length of the plug, for contact with my sphincter muscle. The second, smaller pad is positioned opposite the first, along the plug’s head where it stimulated my prostate. We used plenty of the ElectroLube that came with the plug, both inside my ass and on the plug itself.”
Gina: “By the way, we learned that you can use this electrode alone or in conjunction with another electrode, like the one that would go on your penis. But more about that later.”
Kevin: “Yeah ok so, here I am all lubed up and ready to go and then I get cold feet. I know, what a pussy, huh?
Gina: “I think that was my fault. I was all nervous and I’m sure that my anxiety made him nervous. Then finally I just said, ‘Go for it. How bad could it be?’”
Kevin: “I began to turn up the juice, as Hank put it. It was like so friggin amazing. The first thing I felt was involuntary muscle contractions in my sphincter. This made the plug kinda dance rhythmically in my hole. I almost shot my wad right then and there.”
Gina: “OMG, you should have seen his face. It was like he saw the heavens open. He kept trying to grab my hand and guide it to his penis. But I was afraid I was gonna get a shock.”
Kevin: “I kept telling her it would be ok. I certainly could feel the sensations in my cock and balls, but not in my hands when I touched myself.”
Gina: “Finally I relented and let him eat me out while this thing was working his butt. I know, generous of me, huh? He devoured my pussy with an unexpected hunger. I guess I need to feed his bottom like this more often.”
Kevin: “I know; I was like some sex craved maniac. She loved it. So did I. We even came together, and I didn’t even touch my dick. That was like a total first for me.
Guys, if you’re into your ass, like me, there is nothing like Erotic Electro Stimulation. Period.” is totally different from the plug that Glenn had in his talented ass. Instead of being made of acrylic, like his, mine is made of a conductive silicone elastomer. This makes it kinda soft as opposed to rigid, like Glenn’s.

August 29, 2008June 27, 2026

Sport Fuck, Part 1

REVIEW #17

Dr Dick’s Product Review Crew has been busy as all get-out all summer long testing a load of intriguing and oh so practical novelties from the pleasure-oriented folks over at Sportsheets.

Don’t know Sportsheets from a hole in your head? Stick around, sex fans, and let the Dr Dick’s Product Review Crew introduce you to a swell lineup of sexy fun products that will liven up even the most ho-hum sex life.

We have so many products to review that I will present our findings in two parts. Look for Sport Fuck, Part 2 on Friday, September 5, 2008. But for now, let’s check in with our intrepid reviewers.

Sportsheets Doggie Style Position Strap

Dr Dick’s Product Review Crew has been busy as all get-out all summer long testing a load of intriguing and oh so practical novelties from the pleasure-oriented folks over at Sportsheets.

Don’t know Sportsheets from a hole in your head? Stick around, sex fans, and let the Dr Dick’s Product Review Crew introduce you to a swell lineup of sexy fun products that will liven up even the most ho-hum sex life.

(We hwve separate postings for each product. Simply search for Sportsheets to find them all.)

Sportsheets Doggie Style Position Strap $14.50

A soft pad with a sturdy nylon strap lifts the pelvis for more control and deeper penetration. It’s designed to enable and enhance doggie style sex. Comfortable and easy to use, the strap has a handle with an adjustable buckle at each end. Machine washable.

Gina & Kevin

Kevin: “Doggie style is my favorite, but it is not as easy as it looks.”
Gina: “You can say that again!”
Kevin: “This strap takes some of the effort out of this great position and actually makes for much better fuck.”
Gina: “Using this strap, Kevin has more control and can penetrate deeper. The pad on my lower abdomen positions my G-spot perfectly for his thrusts. I don’t have to strain my arms and wrists pushing back against him, because he is able to hold me close using the straps. And the Doggie Style Position Strap
Kevin: “And there’s less strain on my lower back. Getting the proper grip on the straps takes some practice, however. But I learned that it’s like pulling on the reins of a horse’s bridle. In fact, I was able to control Gina using this same principle.
Gina: “Isn’t he romantic? The a big lug!”
Kevin: “Well it’s true. I do have more control. I can rock and tilt your pelvis, which gives you more pleasure, right? At least that’s what you said the first time we used it. Do you remember?”
Gina: “I do remember. And it was more pleasurable for sure. I was simply reacting to the horse comment.
Anyhow, we both liked Doggie Style Position Strap very much.”
Kevin: “It’s become an indispensable part of our play sessions. We highly recommend this to any doggie style lover. And the freakin thing is under $20, so you can’t go wrong.”
Gina: “Our next adventure with this thing will be me using it on Kevin. I’m finally going to take the plunge and strap one on for him and peg his sweet bottom.”
Kevin: “I can’t hardly wait! Maybe tonight will be my lucky night.” spares my face from being shoved into the pillows, mattress or carpet. That alone makes the thing worth having.

Sportsheets Super Sex Sling

Sportsheets Super Sex Sling $ 66.49

The Super Sex Sling has a deluxe comfort neck rest, plus extended straps and padded supports. Fully adjustable, it lets you go wild for hours and hours.

Glenn & Hank

Glenn: “I’m the bottom in our family. Hank, here, he’s the top.”
Hank: “Yeah, we’re just like Jack Sprat and his wife, only completely different.” 😉
Glenn:   “We sometime play in a mutual friend’s dungeon. He has a full-on sling setup that I absolutely love. Hank and I would have one too, but it’s completely impractical in our apartment.”
Hank: “While the Super Sex Sling isn’t in the same ballpark as a pimped-out leather sling hanging from the rafters, it does serve much the same purpose.”
Glenn:   “Yep, Hank (and others) can fuck the bejesus otta me and my legs don’t tire in the ass-ult.”
Hank: “And I don’t have to expend all my energy tryin’ to keep Glenn’s bubba-sized legs up and apart. And that makes a big difference in my endurance during the fuck, I’m happy to report.”
Glenn:   “The Super Sex Sling allows me to use my upper body strength to manage my legs. I get to lift and separate my legs as much as I want and need. This is perfect, because the more tension I have in the muscles in my thighs, the more tension I have in my glutes. And the more tension I have in my ass muscles; the more powerful my orgasm is gonna be.”
Hank: “And Glenn can hold his position even if I have to move to readjust my position. And there’s nothin finer then seeing my man’s legs open wide and pulled back so I can gaze upon his hairy hole as it winks at me,”
Glenn:   “This device is worth its weight in gold, no doubt about it.
But here’s the thing. If I saw this package in a store I would walk right on by it. The guy and girl on the cover look great and all, but I would have never stopped and considered how this sling might be used by me — a big gay homosexual — and my husband.”
Hank: “I totally agree. I looked all over the Sportsheets website, the only packaging they have represents straight people. That’s so disappointing. I’d be willing to bet that if they repackaged some of their toys using two hot guys on the cover in the same way they use the straight couple, their shit would fly off the shelf. I know it would get my attention ASAP!”

Sportsheets Sex Sling $36.00

This is the perfect sex sling for oral stimulation, vaginal and/or anal sex, and G-spot penetration and stimulation. Using the Sex Sling you can keep your legs and hips comfortably raised for prolonged periods of time, making access incredibly simple. The tension on the straps is easily adjusted using the black plastic buckle adjusters. These adjusters also make quick-release of the legs simple.

Joy & Dixie

Joy: “I want to reiterate and underscore what Hank was saying about the packaging. Now I know I’m never gonna see a picture of a couple of hot chicks using whatever toy, but some diversity would be appreciated. Even some people of color would add interest.”
Dixie: “I’d like to see some packaging that reflects actual users too, but that’s probably never gonna happen. So let’s move on.”
Joy: “Dixie and I compared this Sex Sling with the one Glenn and Hank have — the Super Sex Sling. Ours is basically the same concept as theirs, only ours is the stripped down model. There isn’t as much comfortable support on our neck pad as they have on theirs.
Dixie: “I agree, this Sex Sling does what the Sportsheets people say it will — keeps my legs elevated and apart for when Joy’s bangin’ me or eatin’ me out.”
Joy: “And because it’s adjustable, I can use it as well as Dixie. And as you can see, I’m a much bigger gal.” 😉
Dixie: “Both of us agree with what Glenn said about increased muscle tension in our legs and butt. This increased muscle tension really does increase the intensity of our orgasms.
Joy: “Yep, I knew about this secret for better orgasms long before we tried the Sex Sling. It’s just that I never used anything like this before and so I didn’t realize how effective something as simple as a sling would be at increasing the level of pleasure I experience.”
Dixie: “When Joy is in the Sex Sling I don’t have to worry about trying to support the weight of her legs. Not that I would be able to do that even if I wanted. And when I’m in the Sex Sling it’s much easier for Joy to hit my G-spot with our SHARE (review HERE).
Joy: “We both recommend this item as a starter sling. However, if this concept really appeals to you, as it does us. We suggest you go for the Super Sex Sling. It’s thirty bucks more, but worth it!”

The Penetration Station

The Penetration Station by Sportsheets —— $54.00

When you use the Penetration Station you can fully realize deeper penetration and thrust in a wide array of positions (from doggy to missionary to cowgirl and others). The straps are highly adjustable to fit any mattress and once you and your partner hold on, then the ride will begin. The product consists of one 12′ center strap, four 7′ leverage straps and 4 neoprene attachments. Each of these pieces can fit easily underneath the mattress for discreet storage.

Jack & Karen

Karen: “This is our first appearance as members of Dr Dick’s Product Review Crew. So maybe a little introduction is in order. Jack and I are Swingers. We’ve been in the lifestyle, as it’s called, for 6 years. We’re both on the kinky side of the spectrum and are very fond of light bondage and the associated discipline. We are both bisexuals, me more so than Jack, but we play with same and other sex partners.”
Jack: “Karen and I were so stoked when Dr Dick invited us to join his crew, so we hope to do him and our fellow reviewers proud. So here’s a shout out to all the pervs in our audience. We’re here for ya baby!”
Karen: “The Penetration Station setup is a snap (literally and figuratively). All we had to do is loop the straps under our mattress, as shown in the instructions, so that two straps come up from the head of the bed and two come up from the foot of the bed. Neoprene and nylon attachments easily snap in place and work as handgrips, foot stirrups or thigh straps.”
Jack: “And you can use this on any sized bed. Once the basic set up is complete, you get to choose from a variety of possible uses. This thing is so damned versatile.”
Karen: “The straps detach from the loops with clips and the whole thing can be tucked under the mattress when not in use.”
Jack: “We had to be patient as we fumbled around trying to get the hang of things. Karen and I had to keep referring to the illustrations to get into the positions we wanted. We kept cracking up over our awkwardness. This didn’t add to the passion, but we had a good time nonetheless.”
Karen: “At first, I couldn’t stop laughing. I was getting more tangled up in the straps than anything. Laughing at ourselves kept the frustration level down. But boy-oh-boy, once we figured it out, it became like second nature to us.”
Jack: “I’m like Kevin; doggie style is my favorite position. The Penetration Station allows Karen to grasp the straps from the foot of the bed while I grab the ones from the head of the bed. This brings us tight in on each other, more so than one could do without the Penetration Station. We both get balance and stability and the deepest fuck ever thanks to this little wonder.”
Karen: “Jack’s right! I no longer have to worry about getting my face smooched into the mattress or stressing my elbows as I brace myself against Jack’s thrusts. Gina mentioned the same thing in her review. I’m so glad I’m not alone in this.”
I can now actually press back against Jack for an even deeper thrust and G-spot stimulation.”
Jack: “Neither one of us is exhausted by trying to hold one position or another. The fuck, however, is sure enough exhausting, but that’s the way it’s supposed to be, huh?”
Karen: “I like that the Penetration Station is so portable. We’ve already taken it to several play parties. I love introducing our swinger friends to this amazing device. It immediately becomes the life of the party.
The neoprene cuffs are very comfortable on both hands and feet.
Jack: “I’m in charge of clean-up after play and so I like how easily the Penetration Station can be discreetly stored under the mattress.
You can wipe off any lube residue on the straps or cuffs with a damp cloth and you’re favorite spray cleaner. It’s also machine washable!”