Kevin – DR DICK SEX ADVICE

October 23, 2009July 9, 2026

3 Hits and A Miss

We’re back with a slew of new reviews. The intrepid Dr Dick’s Review Crew tackles a mixed bag of treats.

Today we will hear from Review Crew Members: Jada, Ken & Denise, Kevin and Jack & Karen. So without further ado…

We begin with a couple of new offerings from that gargantuan adult toy company, Doc Johnson. Here’s Jada to tell us about the first one.

Doc Johnson i-Vibe Rabbit Vibrator —— $36.30

Jada
The very first vibe I ever owned was a rabbit vibrator. I got off on it in record time, every time. But it was such a wild looking contraption I never really warmed up to it.

Aesthetically speaking, there’s something about the “rabbit” doohickey that juts out from the vibe’s shaft that I find disturbing. Don’t get me wrong; I understand the reason it is there. For most women, clitoral stimulation is what gets us off. I’m guessing that the insertable shaft, which is, strangely enough, usually penis shaped, is a way we tip our hat to the male member, even though most of our vibrator use is by ourselves. Frankly, I’ve never really understood that. I just don’t know too many women who need a penis reminder when we’re masturbating.

This suggests to me that these designs originate in the male mind. I wish there was a way I could substantiate this.

Ok, so from the aesthetics point of view the i-Vibe Rabbit Vibrator doesn’t do a thing for me. But I won’t detract points on that account either. I review the toy on its merits.

Speaking of aesthetics; what I do like about this toy is its packaging. It’s a plastic clamshell that slips inside a frosted oval plastic sheath. It’s a very nice presentation that I find very attractive.

The i-Vibe Rabbit uses 4-AA batteries and they are not included in the package. DISAPPOINTED! The battery compartment is easy to use and it seals shut making the toy waterproof. That’s a big plus in my book.

The keypad controls are pretty intuitive, although I think they should be in the reverse position. Like I said, most women use a vibrator on themselves. Looking down on the keypad, while using it on myself I see the controls upside down.

There are two main utilities — clitoral tickler (the rabbit) and shaft vibration (which doesn’t really vibrate, rather it rotates the beads in the shaft as well as the penis shaped head). There are different speeds and three functions. Frankly, I think all this is overkill.

It’s a bit noisier than I like, but with everything that’s going on with the i-Vibe Rabbit that’s not all that surprising. Despite all the functions and speeds, this thing never really delivers the kind of vibration I want and need. I was able to get off on it, but it wasn’t as effortless as I had hoped.

All the functions and speed variations run down the batteries very quickly, which seemed wasteful. I would have preferred the toy do one thing really well and have the batteries last longer. But, in the end, none of this mattered at all, because after installing the second set of batteries (brand new fresh ones, I might add) the unit simply stopped working. That’s right, within a week of getting the blasted thing; it was in the trash. DIASPPOINTED! I would have been furious had I paid good money for this.

Come on, Doc Johnson, you should be able to do much better than this!

Next, Kevin introduces us to the other Doc Johnson product.

Doc Johnson Harmony Divine Yin —— $49.99

Kevin
I’m happy to report that I had better luck with my toy then Jada did.

This here is the Harmony Divine Yin (black), which is exactly like the Yang (white), except for the color. It is a multi-speed (3), waterproof vibe with a very stylish shape. Despite having an interesting shape, there is nothing about it that suggests craftsmanship. You can tell immediately that it is mass-produced. There is also a disposable quality about it, which is too bad. Because with a little more though behind this, the Harmony Divine Yin could have been something quite remarkable.

It is made of hard plastic. I didn’t think I was going to take to the hardness, but I wound up liking it very much. So I have no quarrel with the material used.

The batteries (2-AAA) are easy to install. No batteries are included in the package, which sucks. And the battery compartment is easily closed to create what they claim is a watertight fit. I use it in the shower, but I won’t use it in the bath. I’d just as soon not ruin this by tempting the fates, if ya know what I mean.

Harmony Divine Yin is not very powerful, but I won’t kick it out of bed. The nipple-like button turns it on and cycles through the three speeds. The hard plastic conducts the vibration better than say a jelly toy would; so there’s that. It’s pretty quiet too.

The serious end of Harmony Divine Yin is sort of plug-shaped and is nearly 2 inches in diameter at its widest part. In terms of this being used as a butt plug or a prostate stimulator, it isn’t for the novice butt pirate. However, it’s a nice external stimulator for your taint (perineum) and balls. Because it’s hard plastic, you can sit on it with the pointy end on your rosebud while you whack off. It gives you a nice little buzz. If you’re gonna use it internally; lube is a necessity. Again, because it’s hard plastic, you can use whatever kind of lube you want. This will make the tapered end easier to insert. Not that it’s particularly difficult for those of us who know what we’re doing.

I liked doing my kegel exercises on the Harmony Divine Yin unyielding hardness. If you’re up for it, the ridges in the middle of the toy will provide some extra stimulation during a thrusting motion. Once it’s inserted, it can be pretty much a hands-free toy.

Clean up is super easy with mild soap and warm water. You can also wipe it down with a lint-free towel moistened with peroxide, rubbing alcohol or a 10% bleach solution too.

One final thing, I think this is a bit pricey for a simple straightforward hard plastic vibe, especially since it’s not all that powerful. If it were $10 less, I’d say go for it; what do you have to lose? But for just about $10 more you’d be able get yourself a very nice, powerful silicone vibe that will probably last much longer than the Harmony Divine Yin will.

Jack & Karen tell us about a new Tristan Taormino video.

The Expert Guide to Anal Sex —— $29.95

Jack & Karen
Jack: “So ya’ll know I’m real new at the whole butt sex thing, right? I’m still discovering the pleasures that lie within.”
Karen: “I’ve been dying to strap on one and give this boy a pegging he will not forget.”
Jack: “It’s talk like that that give me pause.”
Karen: “Sorry, honey, I was just making a little joke.”
Jack: “What my foray into anal sex has done for me is give me a greater sensitivity toward women and the invasive sex they have all the time. I mean, if someone were to fuck me in the ass like I have fucked some women in the pussy, without even so much as a warm-up, I’d fuckin kill them.”
Karen: “That is an awakening that I wish all men would come to sooner rather than later.”
Jack: “Anyhow, not to veer too far off topic; I was glad we got this DVD to review. It really opened my eyes to the pleasures to be had in butt fucking.”
Karen: “This is a terrific resource for the novice as well as the proficient alan sex practitioners. International sex expert, Tristan Taormino, talks to a group of (straight) couples about anal anatomy, as well as delvers tips, and techniques of anal pleasure. Her co-hosts, Lorelei and Ariel, demonstrate various techniques as Tristan narrates what they are doing. There’s even a Q&A period.”
Jack: “It is both super arousing and very informative. This is a co-production with one of porn’s biggest companies, Vivid. So you know it’s gonna be hot. Unfortunately, and this is a huge disappointment for me; it’s only about women receiving anal. What, they couldn’t have included some men on the receiving end? Bummer.”
Karen: “That is so true! But that doesn’t diminish the information imparted. For example, Tristan talks about lubes and desensitizing agents; and that’s applicable to both women and men.”
Jack: “You get comments from Tristan as well as pop-up tips about the action throughout the feature. I also liked the way the performers talked about anal sex and why they like it. This goes a long way in helping demystify what is often a taboo subject for most couples.”
Karen: “I like how toys, particularly plugs were used as a warm-up to cock penetration. I know from my own experiences with anal sex that foreplay is essential.”
Jack: “I was also kind of surprised that there was little mention of the increased risks of sexually transmitted diseases with anal sex. NO CONDOMS WERE USED IN THIS MOVIE! What’s up with that? Maybe they didn’t want to scare people who may be considering including anal in their monogamous couple sex. There is a safer sex mini-feature included on the DVD, but I thought there could have been more in the feature itself.”
Karen: “There’s also a featurette on anal hygiene, which I found informative.”
Jack: “I really got off on the hot, hot, hot girl-on-girl bonus scene. Finally a little strap-on action!”
Karen: “We recommend this DVD as a good place to start for women considering anal sex. Guys who are interested in exploring their bottom need to look elsewhere.”

Finally, let’s have a little fun with Ken & Denise and their parlor game. (This is a Good Vibrations Brand Ambassador review.)

Truth or Dare: A Game of Passion —— $16.95

Ken & Denise
Denise: “I love games, all kinds of games. I guess I’m just a party girl at heart.”
Ken: “I, on the other hand, think most games, especially parlor games are boring.”
Denise: “Yeah, but this one is different, because it’s like a sex game.”
Ken: “So we had two of our favorite couples over for dinner last week. We were all sufficiently socially lubricated, if ya catch my drift. We plunked ourselves down in front of the fire for a little postprandial toke, when little Mary sunshine over here hauls out the Truth or Dare game!”
Denise: “What a better time for a little fun?”
Ken: “I’m thinkin’ ‘oh god, do we have to?’ But our friends who are green with envy over our gig on Dr Dick’s Review Crew were like, ‘cool, let’s do this!’”
Denise: “Luckily, considering the condition we were all in, the game is super simple. There’s one die that you roll and two stacks of cards — one marked Truth, the other marked Dare.”
Ken: “The die has Truth or Dare on six of the eight sides. The other two sides have the word ‘Wild’ on it. If you roll that, you get to choose either a Truth or Dare card. Then you can either do the thing yourself or order your partner to perform the task, or you can pass.”
Denise: “We all got increasingly silly as the game wore on. If you choose a Truth card, it may read, ‘If you could watch an intimate moment from your partner’s life before you met, what would that be?’ ‘Would you ever buy a private lap dance for your partner?’ ‘What authority figure possesses the most erotic possibilities for you?’ ‘What sensual characteristic or ability do you envy in the opposite sex?’”
Ken: “The Dare” cards are equally innocuous; however, they often involve props — computers, whipped cream, makeup, etc. ‘You are the subject of an impromptu erotic photo shoot. You partner will be the photographer…’ ‘Perform a seductive and enticing striptease to the music of your choice.’ ‘Create a bondage costume using nothing but plastic wrap!’ You get the idea.”
Denise: “Some of the Dare cards involve calling other people on the phone to ask dumb questions. This is never a good idea, especially when the person you’re calling isn’t as loaded as you are. But we just disregarded those commands, and we had a ball.”
Ken: “I think our friends were a bit intimidated by some of the tasks. They’re not as big a freaks as us. But it’s true; fun was had by all.”
Denise: “Good point! Before you consider playing this game with anyone other than your significant other, review the cards to see if it’s actually a good idea for the company you have in mind.

ENJOY

October 9, 2009July 9, 2026

Sex fans, we have a load of lovely lubes to tell you about. We received five of the hottest selling Boy Butter products to test, and test we did! In fact, The Dr Dick Review Crew has pert near wore out their parts testing this stuff. What we won’t do in the name of science.

Review Crew members; Mick & Chuck, Kevin & Gina, Jack & Karen and Carlos walk us around these products.

Boy Butter Warming 5 oz EZ-Pump —— $20.99

Gina & Kevin
Gina: “We’ve both been wanting to try a warming lube, so I’m glad we were chosen for Boy Butter Warming .”
Kevin: “I like the pump container. It’s easy to use and there’s not the mess that often comes with traditional containers.”
Gina: “This stuff really works! With just the first application I could feel the warming sensations. At first, I thought it was going to get too intense for me, but it didn’t.”
Kevin: “It’s a coconut-oil based lube so it’s not compatible with latex condoms. That’s not an issue for us, but I did want to mention that in my review. Also, this is the first creamy lube we’ve used. I was impressed with its lasting power.”
Gina: “I must confess; I had my misgivings at first. I have very sensitive skin and I often have adverse reactions to new lubes. I checked the label on Boy Butter Warming and secretly thought to myself, I can’t even pronounce half of the ingredients. This doesn’t bode well for me using it. At least, that’s what I thought. Curiously enough, I experienced no irritation or discomfort. So yeah for that!”
Kevin: “We love our silicone lubes, but they are a bitch to clean up and they stain clothing. This product however, despite containing silicone and being oil-based, cleaned up in a snap. In fact, it cleaned up like a water-based lube.

Boy Butter 5 oz EZ-Pump —— $16.99

Carlos
This is the original formula Boy Butter. It comes in several different packaging options, so you may have seen it in a tub or a squeeze bottle. Personally, I think this E-Z pump is the best. It’s easy to handle, and you can dispense just the right amount of lube you need every time. The plastic top keeps it from accidentally messing up anything else it may come in contact with.

I really like the creamy consistency of Boy Butter. It lasts longer than other oil-based lubes I’ve tried; and I’ve tried plenty. The organic coconut-oil base keeps it slick and silky. I’ve never found a better jack-off lube than Boy Butter. It even outlasts my favorite silicone-based lube. I’m sold on this product.

Keep in mind; you can’t use Boy Butter with latex condoms.

Clean up is pretty easy too, soap and warm water will do. It’s so much easier to clean up than my favorite silicone-based lube.

The only drawback that I can see is it doesn’t taste very nice. But then again, I’m just jacking off with it. If I planned to go down on someone, I think I would choose a different lube.

Boy Butter H₂O 5 oz EZ-Pump —— $16.99

Jack & Karen
Jack: “Damn, this stuff is great!”
Karen: “This is the first creamy formula water-based lube I’ve eve seen. I didn’t even know you could make such a thing.”
Jack: “We concur with all our fellow reviewers, Boy Butter H₂O last long, never gets sticky. We really like the pump container too. Very convenient!”
Karen: “This formula is perfect for use with latex condoms. And because it is water-based, clean up is a breeze. It won’t stain clothing or beading either. And that’s a big plus in my book.”
Jack: “Neither one of us experienced any negative reactions to this lube; no irritation, nothing. And we used it for fucking, not just for jillin’ or jackin’ off.
Karen: “Yeah, I was really surprised by this. I’m always very careful about what I put near, on or in my pussy. But knock on wood, I’ve had no adverse reaction at all.”
Jack: “Kudos for great packaging and branding. It’s fun and smart. Funny, up until we got Boy Butter H₂O to review, I had never heard of the company. I wonder, is it a product line that is primarily marketed to gay men?
Karen: “If it is, that would be really too bad. Because other straight and bi folks, like us, would really enjoy Boy Butter H₂O too.
Jack: “Get some today; you won’t be sorry!

Boy Butter Extreme 5 oz. E-Z Pump —— $17.99

Boy Butter Extreme Desensitizing H₂0 Based 5 oz EZ-Pump —— $19.25

Mick & Chuck
Mick: “We have a little confession to make. Chuck and I had already used Boy Butter Extreme before we were asked to review it.”
Chuck: “We hadn’t used the H₂0 Based formula and we really wanted to, so we asked if we could test both products.”
Mick: “Until we tried the H₂0 Based one, we thought Boy Butter Extreme was the best such product on the market. We’ve tired several other desensitizing products, but we liked Boy Butter Extreme best.”
Chuck: “Sometimes Mick has difficulty relaxing into butt sex. I’m not tooting my own horn here, but I’m hung 8.5”, pretty thick too.”
Mick: “Trust me, it’s a sight to behold. But it’s true; I have a tendency to tighten up when I’m just getting started in a fuck. Boy Butter Extreme helps me over this initial phase allows me to enjoy all that is to come.”
Chuck: “I love the pump container. Both products are long-lasting and remain slick and silky, which makes fucking a joy. I hate it when lubes get sticky!”
Mick: “Both products use the maximum amount of Benzocaine (7.5%) allowed by law. So you know this is industrial strength!”
Chuck: “Some people have an adverse reaction to Benzocaine. If you do, these are not the products for you.”
Mick: “I am so happy that Boy Butter make a H₂0 formula, because Chuck has to use a condom when I use either of these products. And the H₂0 Based version is condom safe.”
Chuck: “I was just about to mention that. We had an unfortunate experience a while back when we first started using desensitizing lubes and whatnot. I didn’t wear a condom and my dick became desensitized too.”
Mick: “Come to think of it, this wouldn’t be such a bad thing for a guy who has a real short fuse, right? The Benzocaine would probably just the thing to help him last longer.”
Chuck: “Oh, and may I suggest that you use these products sparingly. A little goes a very long way. You certainly don’t want to over use either of these lubes. It will take all the fun out of the fuck for both top and bottom; you’ll not be able to feel a thing.”
Mick: “Exactly, ya simply want to apply a small amount of Boy Butter Extreme (or the H₂0 Based formula) to your finger, insert it into your ass. Smooth it around till you’ve lightly coated your sphincter. You will notice the numbing effect in a minute or two. Remember, you can always add more if needed, but you can’t eliminate it once it’s been applied. At least, not without soap and water.”
Chuck: “We highly recommend these products with the precautions we mention.”
Mick: “If you’ve shied away from anal sex simply because of the initial discomfort, give one or another of these Boy Butter Extreme products a try. I think you will be pleasantly surprised.”

ENJOY

October 2, 2009July 9, 2026

Luscious LELO, Our Conclusion

For the last seven months, the Dr Dick Review Crew has been reveling in the sensuous pleasures that are LELO. We’ve brought you 4 reviews so far — ELISE, BO, IRIS and GIGI

Today, we conclude our LELO presentation with three other amazing products. Review Crew Members: Kevin & Gina, Joy & Dixie and Brad do the honors.

ELLA —— $44.00

Kevin & Gina
Gina: “We kicked off the LELO reviews with our review of GIGI.”
Kevin: “So there’s some beautiful symmetry to us being part of the concluding reviews.”
Gina: “And speaking of symmetry we have the pleasure of introducing you to ELLA, another stunning pleasure object from the undisputed leader in adult products, LELO!”
Kevin: “ELLA is not a vibrator. It is, however, a beautifully sculpted insertable that is ideal for G-spot or P-spot stimulation.”
Gina: “And you can use either end! It’s like getting two toys in one.”
Kevin: “It comes in the famous LELO high-end packaging. It’s perfect for gift giving. But for those of us who appreciate minimal packaging, it can sometimes feel like over kill.”
Gina: “And because there is no vibration with this pleasure object, there’s no fussing with batteries or dubious recharge ports. Besides, I like the fact that I can be the instrument of my own bliss.”
Kevin: “It’s made of 100% seamless silicone. It is soft and velvety and beautiful to the touch. It’s approximately 7.25 inches long and 1.5 inches across at the widest point. Like Gina mentioned, ELLA can be inserted using either end. The curved tip is just like the GIGI. I LOVE IT!
Gina: “Because it is silicone, it cleans up is easy with mild soap and warm water. You can wipe it down with a lint-free towel moistened with hydrogen peroxide, rubbing alcohol or a 10% bleach solution too. If you’re going to share this toy, and I really think you should, you can serialize it in boiling water for a minute or two, or pop it in the top shelf of the dishwasher.”
Kevin: “I totally agree that you ought to share this toy. We all have a ‘spot’ of one sort or another — G or P, that is. Just insert the curved tip about two inches into your pussy or asshole, as the case may be, with the curve pointed towards the front of your body and rock the handle up and down. Oh baby, oh baby!”
Gina: “Kevin does not exaggerate. This is what I meant when I said I like being the instrument of my own bliss.”
Kevin: “If you’re more of a dildo kinda person, the other, long tapered end of ELLA will put a smile on your face.”
Gina: “Use it on yourself for solo play; use it on your partner for partnered play.”
Kevin: “And it’s not just a pleasure object; it’s also a therapeutic object. You can use this honey to do your Kegels with too. And all of us, men and women need to do those.”
Gina: “Of course, you can use only water-based lube with this beauty. And when you’re finished diddling yourself and/or your partner clean it and store it in the satin pouch thoughtfully provided by the good people at LELO.”
Kevin: “This is one of the more affordable LELO products. Beautiful styling and superior quality for under fifty bucks. You can’t beat that with a stick!”

Next up is BOB. We turn to Brad for his thoughts.

BOB —— $49.00

Brad
Hey, isn’t BOB and acronym for Big Old Bottom? That’s what Dr Dick keeps calling me! So ok, I’m a straight guy with a thing for his prostate. For years I couldn’t admit this to myself, let alone others. But nowadays I’m an out and proud butt pirate.

And as a personal trainer, I often find myself talking to my male clients about prostate health. Apparently, my straight clients find that information easier to take because I’m straight too. And I’ve been telling them about my BOB, you can count on that.

Anyhow, I’m like totally down with BOB, this stylish gentleman’s butt plug. If you’ve never tried a plug, this is the ideal starter size. It’s about 3” of insertable length and not much thicker than my thumb. It is easy to insert, even for the novice. And because its “plug” shaped it stays in place once inserted. BTW, you’ll want to use a water-based lube with this 100% silicone toy.

BOB is so comfortable, as well as being very stimulating, so you can wear it for hours. I do. People often ask me why I smile so much and why am so easy going. If they only knew I had BOB in my ass! I absolutely love saying that.

BOB has this ring on its base; this keeps it from going in too far and makes pulling it out of your ass a breeze. If you really want to treat yourself to a nice prostate massage, all ya do is use the ring to make thrusting and rocking motions. I can actually cum by massaging my prostate like this. I don’t even have to touch my dick.

LELO makes BOB affordable; it’s under $50. But you still get all the special LELO touches, like beautiful packaging and even a little satin pouch for safe keeping, when it’s not up your bum. Because it’s silicone its easy to clean with mild soap and warm water. You can wipe it down with a lint-free towel moistened with peroxide, rubbing alcohol or a 10% bleach solution too. You can serialize it in boiling water for a minute or two, or pop it in the dishwasher.

Dudes, if you still think that ass play, even by yourself is like all gay and stuff, you are totally missing out. Get a BOB and find out what I mean. And you’ll be on your way to some fine pleasure as well as some serious prostate health.

Finally there’s LUNA BEADS and for that review we turn to Joy & Dixie

LUNA BEADS —— $47.00

Joy & Dixie
Joy: “We’re glad to be back with everyone after having a couple months off. We were on an extended holiday and we missed all our toys at home while we were away.”
Dixie: “That’s not exactly true, we did take a couple of our favorite toys with us. One new one that we well talk about at another time, and the other was our delightful LUNA BEADS. They are very discreet and easy to pack. And they are both pleasurable and therapeutic.”
Joy: “LUNA BEADS are LELO’s take on a very old idea, Ben Wa Balls. You’ve heard of them, right? They were invented hundreds of years ago, to enhance female sexual stimulation and to exercise a woman’s PC muscles (pubococcygeus muscle). In other words, you do your Kegel exercises with these puppies.
Dixie: “Here’s a tip; the more Kegels you do, the more intense your orgasms are.”
Joy: “You simply insert the LUNA BEADS, each of which has an inner ball that creates the most amazing vibration sensation.”
Dixie: “The kit comes with two sets of silicone balls that pop in and out of a plastic girdle – one set is close to 30 grams and the other set is around 40 grams.”
Joy: “You can mix and match the weighted balls to build up your PC muscles. And you can wear these for hours, if you’d like. I know I like!”
Dixie: “Being made of silicone they are easy to sterilize, which makes the LUNA BEADS shareable. But for under $50 you may want your own set.”
Joy: “Dixie and I both like to masturbate with the LUNA BEADS. They deliver intense orgasms, because your muscles contract around the vibrating balls.”
Dixie: “You can say that again. And there’s never a need to change batteries or wait for a recharge. You can see why we took the LUNA BEADS on our vacation.”
Joy: “We completely endorse this product. They are both fun and healthful. We’ll never leave home without them.”
Dixie: “Given all the very expensive toys out there, including several of the other LELO products, one can’t go wrong plunking down your hard-earned money for a set of these.”
Joy: “Our friend, Karen, is about to give birth to her first child. We’re going to give her LUNA BEADS at the baby shower. No mother should be without!”

ENJOY!

June 12, 2009July 9, 2026

Class (GLASS) Act

Hey sex fans,

Lookie what we have here; its art that is as stunning on your mantle as it is inside you. Over the next two weeks, the Dr Dick Review Crew has the pleasure (both literally and figuratively) of introducing you to three exquisite insertables by a brand new artisan: Simply Blown. They get extra points for their name and the double entendre. Who doesn’t appreciate a sex toy company with a sense of humor?

Each one of the toys we have is unique. They are individually crafted and are museum quality. Think of it as old world craftsmanship with a wickedly sexy edge. What could be finer?

Dr Dick Review Crew members — Gina & Kevin and Joy & Dixie do the honors.

This week Gina & Kevin is tell us about Love Line.

Gina: “You can understand my excitement when Kevin and I were chosen to review these beauties. Just look at them! I could hardly contain myself.”
Kevin: “She gets that way sometimes.”
Gina: “What, are you trying to say you didn’t cream your jeans at the thought of having one of this up your bum?”
Kevin: “Oh I’m so BUSTED!”
Gina: “There, I told you.”
Kevin: “Gina’s right we both got a little moist at the thought of diddlin’ ourselves (and one another) with the likes of the Love Line. She got the big one — 9″ tall x 1 5/8″ diameter, which stand on a flared base.”
Gina: “And he got the petite one — 5″ tall x 1″ diameter, also with a flared base.”
Kevin: “She used hers in her pussy, I used mine in my ass!”
Gina: “It’s exactly like Jack Sprat and his wife, only completely different.”
Kevin: “We no sooner got in the door when we dropped trou, whipped out the lube and had at it for our first go.”
Gina: “The tiniest bit of lube, either water-based or silicone-based, makes these beautiful glass insertables super slick.”
Kevin: “I love to watch Gina fuck herself with her toys. I get so fuckin’ hot. The Love Line glass made the experience almost psychedelic. Once she got her rhythm, the 9” of super-smooth purple art plunged deeper into Gina with each stroke. This drove her wild. And, of course, I egged her on by making the most lewd comments I could think of. ‘That’s it baby, stretch out that tiny little cunt of yours with that really big boy.’ ”
Gina: “He does love his dirty talk. I used to be so embarrassed when he would do that. It sounded so crude. Now turns me on. See I’m growing!”
Kevin: “Gina’s on her back, propped up by pillows. I’m opposite her squatting till my ass lips come in contact with the glass. It’s cool and my ass devours it.”
Gina: “It’s true, without so much as a moment’s hesitation the petite pink plug disappears inside him. He grins with amusement and spews more filthy talk.”
Kevin: “I’ve taken bigger, but the hardness of the glass is a new sensation. Oh, and by the way, this insertable can’t really be called a plug. It’s a dildo. A plug would have a notch just before the base that my sphincter would lock onto to hold it in place.”
Gina: “I stand corrected.”
Kevin: “I sure do hope Simply Blown does come out with a line of plugs. Because I would love to wear one of these babies for a few hours.”
Gina: “We both came watching each other pleasure ourselves. I love to watch Kevin feed his behind.”
Kevin: “Don’t you just love how she avoids calling my asshole an asshole?”
Gina: “Sheesh!”
Kevin: “On our next date with the Love Line we took our time. We added some sensation play. The Love Line, indeed all fine glass like this, can be heated and chilled. We used both, a hot water bath in one bowl and an ice water bath in the other. Going from hot to cold or cold to hot blew our minds.”
Gina: “These toys are meant to shared. Because glass is nonporous, cleaning and disinfecting is a snap. Mild soap and water to clean; a 10% bleach solution, boiling or the dishwasher to disinfect.”
Kevin: “On our next go at these lovelies; I got to try the big boy, the one Gina had first. It took some time and some deep breathing but I did it. Gina helped me relax. And once I had the gape goin, she plugged my ass but good.”
Gina: “He is an ass-slut, that’s for damn sure. See I said ass!”
Kevin: “Gina liked the petite dildo. It was easier to hit her G-spot.”
Gina: “I highly recommend the Love Line to anyone who is looking for the classic glass dildo. You will not be disappointed.”
Kevin: “And anyone out there still unsure about glass toys, if you buy quality, like the Simply Blown line, you have nothing to worry about. But like all high-end toys you need to treat it right. Care for it properly, and it will last a lifetime.”
Gina: “Generally we are able include a retail price and a link to an online store with our reviews. Unfortunately, we can’t do that this week. Simply Blown is so new a company that you’ll just have to contact them directly and ask for pricing.”

ENJOY

January 30, 2009July 1, 2026

A BEAUTYFUL HANDFUL – Goldfrau

REVIEW #30

Hey sex fans,

Today we have something extraordinary indeed.

Over the last several months The Dr Dick Review Crew has had the pleasure of reviewing several exquisite high-end insertables made from some surprising materials. Among them — Pyrex glass, medical grade silicone, wood and even aircraft-quality spun aluminum. Besides being fun and functional; each and every one of these lovelies is also an exceptional work of art. Today we add porcelain to that list of exceptional materials.

Gina & Kevin — Reviews #4, 13, 16, 17, 18, 23, 24, 27. 28

Goldfrau — Miss Pink $240

Gina: “If I were to try to design the perfect dildo, I couldn’t do better than this Australian company has done with their signature product — Goldfrau. It’s simply perfect and perfectly simple. It’s delightfully sensual; it’s beautiful art; it’s creatively innovative and it is GREEN! I know I’m gushing, but my Goldfrau is stunning.”
Kevin: “Gina’s right; I’m blown away too.”
Gina: “I admit, at first I was a little skeptical. Porcelain is ceramic, of course, and all I could think of was how fragile that would make it. I had the vision of a fine porcelain doll in mind. I was oh so wrong. After a little research, I discovered that stoneware ceramics, like this, are exceptionally durable and versatile. There are ceramic knives, ceramic engines parts and the space shuttle’s exterior is made of ceramic tiles.”
Kevin: “The ceramic used in crafting the Goldfrau will not chip, crack, or break under normal use. And you’re gonna want to treat this baby with loving care, not because it’s fragile, but because it is a stunning work of art”
Gina: “Check this out! The Goldfrau comes wrapped in this handsome lined soft leather pouch that just screams elegance. The Miss Pink Goldfrau I have is cream-colored porcelain with an intricate lavender lace pattern on it. The shaft is absolutely smooth and it’s just a tad short of 9″ long. It has a real nice heft to it too; nearly 10 ounces.”
Kevin: “It’s shaped like a baseball bat with a rounded handle, which makes for easy handling even when lubed. We discovered that a little lube went a very long way. And you can use any type of lube you want with this porcelain beauty.”
Gina: “Here’s a really neat feature I discovered. Despite the straight shaft, the Goldfrau is perfect for G-spot stimulation. It’s odd, because most of the other G-spot stimulators I’ve seen or used have a curve to them. The Goldfrau does not.”
Kevin: “Yeah, I feel confident using this thing on Gina without fear of injuring her. Those curved dildos can sometime get turned around in her pussy and when the curve is pointing opposite to the G-spot that can hurt.”
Gina: “I also really like the fact that I can warm and chill the Goldfrau to suit my mood. It’s very easy to do. You can chill it in the refrigerator for a few minutes or warm it by running hot water over it.”
Kevin: “And it changes temperature very quickly. So get this, one evening I blindfolded Gina and restrained her spread-eagle on the bed. I had a bowl of ice water and a bowl of hot water next to the bed. I teased and tormented her clit and pussy with surprises in varying temperatures. She got so wet I had to get down on all fours and lapped up all her sweet juices. And you can use either end of the Goldfrau for wicked pleasure”
Gina: “I have to admit, not knowing what was coming next — cold or hot drove me wild. I was so totally turned on. And I don’t think I ever lubricated that much in my life. My man knows how to push my buttons.”
Kevin: “While we were doing this hot/cold thing I made up a story about an beautiful Chinese princess who had been abducted by a cruel warlord and was being tortured into submission. The warlord would fuck the princess wildly with an exquisite…wait for it…ancient porcelain dildo.”
Gina: “As you can see, Kevin’s been reading too much erotica. But I did love his story. And being blindfolded and restrained only intensified the experience.”
Kevin: “Hey, there’s no such thing as too much erotica.”
Gina: “You’re right, hon; you can tell me dirty stories anytime. Just make sure the Goldfrau is near at hand. I also want to mention that the Goldfrau, I guess because of its heft, fills me up more than it’s girth would suggest.”
Kevin: “Ya know what? I think the Goldfrau people should work on developing a similar porcelain toy just for us ass-centric men. I mean a guy could use one of these on himself to great effect. I’m just thinking something more along the lines of a hefty porcelain butt plug would totally rock.”
Gina: “Clean up is easy with mild soap and warm water. You can also wipe it down with a lint-free towel moistened with peroxide, rubbing alcohol or a 10% bleach solution too. You can serialize it in boiling water for a minute or two, or pop it in the dishwasher with all your other fine china.”
Kevin: “Guys, if you want to show your Valentine just how special she is; the Goldfrau is the idea gift. It’s a little pricey, but you know your gal is worth it. Besides, you’ll not find its equal anywhere else.”
Gina: “And gals, if you buy only one new pleasure instrument this year; make sure it is a Goldfrau. You will forever thank me for this tip; I promise.”

ENJOY

December 12, 2008July 1, 2026

Rest Ye Merry Gentlemen…and Gentlewomen

REVIEW #28

Hey sex fans,

It’s Week 4, and the final week, of our Holiday Extravaganza. Did you somehow miss Week 1, 2 or 3 of this lollapalooza? Shame on you! Check out Reviews #25, 26 and 27. You’ll be so glad ya did.

The Dr Dick Review Crew has been workin’ overtime gettin you these reviews and now all our naughty parts are sore as all get out. Thank god this is the last week; we need a break, don’t cha know!

This week’s Review Crew include:

Jack & Karen — Reviews #17, 18, 25, 27
Joy & Dixie— Reviews #6, 12, 16, 17, 18, 23, 27
Glenn & Hank — Reviews #4, 16, 17, 18, 23. 24, 27
Gina & Kevin — Reviews #4, 13, 16, 17, 18, 23, 24, 27
Ken & Denise — Reviews #11, 16, 25
Jada — Reviews #14, 16, 20

First up Ken & Denise introduce us to a beautiful wooden insertable from Hans at Hardwood Dildos. I’m a big fan of Hans’. He is more than a craftsman; he’s an artist. He really knows his wood and his woodies! We have just this one dildo to review, but his site is virtually overflowing with ingenious designs. When you visit, be sure to tell him Dr Dick sent you.

Apple Wood Dildo $99

Ken: “I was hoping I would be one of the lucky chosen ones to review one of the great wooden dildos we’ve featured during our Holiday Extravaganza. I lucked out! Denise and I have a real beauty.”
Denise: “That is so true. Unfortunately, our Apple Wood Dildo doesn’t come already named, like the ones reviewed earlier in this series.”
Ken: “Well, it’s only unfortunate if you’re not clever enough to come up with name all on your own. I’ve christened ours Peter…for obvious reasons.”
Denise: “I stand corrected. Maybe I need to be punished. 😉
Ken: “You’d like that, wouldn’t you? Just you wait till we get home, young lady!”
Denise: “Ohhh, Daddy!”
Ken: “We seem to be veering off topic. Back to our beautiful Hardwood Dildo. It is made of Apple wood, a fine-grained, dense wood, which has a very fair color, kinda like maple or cherry. Apparently, the wood comes from trees pruned in Oregon.”
Denise: “Hardwood Dildos is another brilliant GREEN northwest company; so hurray for that! It also has a very traditional shape to it. Unlike some of the other wooden insertables on the market, there is no denying this Apple Wood Dildo is a phallus. It’s 6.25″ x 1.6″/2.6″ with a luscious dickhead and a nice base for easy handling.”
Ken: “That phallus shape suits us just fine, huh honey?”
Denise: “You betcha! I’m real old fashioned gal that way. I love the way it feel in my pussy and my ass.”
Ken: “You can use all kinds of lube with this Hardwood Dildo. It warms nicely to your body very quickly too.”
Denise: “Wash with warm soapy water and dry thoroughly with a soft cloth and you’re done. You can wipe it down with a lint-free towel moistened with peroxide, rubbing alcohol or a 10% bleach solution too.”
Ken: “I feel like I own a unique piece of art, because no two Hardwood Dildos are alike.”
Denise: “And anyone concerned about the finish on these dildos; oughtn’t worry. They get at least five coats of a food grade varnish called a Salad Bowl Finish.”
Ken: “If you are looking for wood (literally or figuratively) Hardwood Dildos is the place to shop.”
Denise: “I hope I find another one of these beauties under my tree this Christmas.”
Ken: “Maybe you could take your tree to Hans after the holidays and have him whip up a little something for you.”
Denise: “What a great idea! I wonder if he does requests. Happy Holidays everyone.”

Gina & Kevin introduce us to a couple of lovable toys for the big kid in all of us. These come from the good people at Big Teaze Toys. Dr Dick gives a bunch of extra points for the delightful names. You go Big Teaze!

I Rub My Duckie Bondage $25.99

Gina: “If a company can make me smile and make me cum at the same time, they win my heart. Now my heart belongs to Big Teaze. I Rub My Duckie Bondage is just one of the great Collector’s Series duckies available from Big Teaze Toys. You have to see the other! Makes me giggle just visiting the site.”
Kevin: “I got such a kick out of this. And speaking of kicks; this little bugger is mighty powerful.”
Gina: “Bondage Duckie has a permanent place in our bathroom. It is always in reach. There is nothing better than a waterproof vibe. I love to get off in the tub.”
Kevin: “It’s a real conversation piece too. It even comes with its own set of Duckie-sized handcuffs. What a hoot! Guests always comment on our fashionable BDSM Duckie. Little do they know.”
Gina: “When Kevin and I enjoy a soak together we never forget to invite Duckie. And you can use it several different ways. But I think you should find that out on your own.”
Kevin: “Batteries ARE included. So your first rides are free!”

I Rub My Wormie Pink Travel Size $22.99

Kevin: “The I Rub My Wormie we have is the travel sized one. That makes is a bit smaller than the regular size. It make an excellent butt plug.”
Gina: “Or Pussy plug! I Rub My Wormie has a, ergonomic bend in his neck to reach your G- or P-spot. It has an easy-grip body so he won’t wiggle out of your hands.”
Kevin: “Oh baby, Oh baby, you make me so hot!! Don’t forget the 3-speeds of vibration.”
Gina: “It actually is the perfect toy to travel with. Airport security will think you are carrying a baby’s toy. If they only knew.
Kevin: “All you health conscious consumers out there should know these toys are non-toxic, Phthalate-free, PVC-free and latex-free.”
Gina: “Sadly, I Rub My Wormie does not come with batteries. What’s up with that Big Teaze Toys? No one should be creating battery operated toys without including the fist set of batteries. It’s just wrong.
Kevin: “Gina and I agree these toys make ideal holiday gifts. Just make sure if you plan to give one of these as a gift that you buy the toy with the batteries, or include the batteries as part of your gift.”
Gina: “No one wants a toy that can’t be used right out of the package.”
Kevin: “Merry Christmas and Happy Holidays from both of us.”
Gina: “And a Happy orgasm-filled New Year too!”

Now Jada gives us the finger, as it were. This is a clever first offering from a new Canadian company — Fun To Have.

Fun Finger $20.00

Jada: At first I thought this was some kind of gag. I mean Fun Finger looks like something you’d find on one of those prank websites. It’s basically a big golden thumb. Fun Finger is soft and flexible. It has a multi-speed vibrator that is adjusted on the base of the finger. It’s made in China of TPR (Thermoplastic Rubber), which is non-toxic, but anyone allergic to latex will not be able use this. I’m not a big fan of Chinese made products, especially nowadays, but this one seems harmless enough.

I did like the unique shape — the cocked thumb. It’s perfect for G-spot stimulation. I wouldn’t, however, recommend it for prostate stimulation. There’s nothing to hold on to at the base and it could easily slip in your bum and disappear. And that would very unpleasant indeed.

Fun Finger would make a fun stocking stuffer for the light-hearted person on your list.

Happy holidays everyone!

Our favorite perv Review Crew members — Joy & Dixie and Glenn & Hank tackle some very interesting devices from Rachel’s Pleasures.

G–Spotter $16.20

Joy & Dixie

Dixie: “This is our second go around with these sorts of products. Joy and I, Glenn and Hank and others did a whole series on some of the products from Sportsheets. You can find those reviews by searching for the word ‘Sportsheets’.”
Joy: “Dixie and I prefer Rachel’s product line to the other. For one thing, we found them more comfortable.”
Dixie: “I hope this doesn’t sound petty, but we also like Rachel’s packaging better. It’s more fun and it isn’t so blatantly heterosexual.”
Joy: “Basically, the G–Spotter is a device that one attaches to the bottom’s ankles so the top can maneuver the bottom’s legs with more ease. The bottom can hold the strap herself or the top can hold it and move it from side to side.”
Dixie: “I liked the Cumfy Cuffs. They are padded for comfort, quick release gismo that is real handy. The G–Spotter is also easily adjustable.”

Cumfy Cuffs And Cumfy Cuffs Extensions Kit $22.50

Glenn & Hank

Glenn: “Hank and I agree with Dixie. We also like Rachel’s packaging better than the Sportsheets packaging. I guess it’s a gay thing!”
Hank: “In fact, we liked everything about the Rachel’s line better. We agree with the gals, it’s a more comfortable setup”
Glenn: “Not that the bottom is supposed to be comfortable all the time. If ya catch my drift.”
Hank: “Yeah, but Rachel’s line of products, although practical and fully functional, is geared toward the bondage novice, wouldn’t you agree?”
Glenn: “Absolutely! But we all have to start somewhere.” 😉
Hank: “Do you know a budding kinkster? Maybe you’re one yourself.
Glenn: “Maybe you’d just like to know the thrill of relinquishing control for an itsy bitsy moment or two.”

Neoprene Harness $24.30

Joy & Dixie introduce us to the Neoprene Harness.

Joy: “Now this is something I can really sink my teeth into.”
Dixie: “What she means to say is ‘…sink a nice big dildo into’.”
Joy: “I loves me my strap-ons! I have quite a collection. Some are more comfortable than others, but I love ‘em all.”
Dixie: “I’m not as much of a connoisseur, as Joy, but this Neoprene Harness is very comfortable, I must say.”
Joy: “It is that! It is also reversible and machine washable. I love that part. I hate having to clean lube and whatnot off my leather harness.”
Dixie: “It’s also fully adjustable. It would have to be to fit both Joy and I. We have such different body types.”
Joy: “This is a really terrific start-out harness for the beginner. It’s inexpensive, yet practical. You just plug in the insertable of your choice (like the one that Ken & Denise showed us earlier) and then go fuck yourself some…whatever.”
Dixie: “Exactly! I’ve already told my ‘straight’ office mate about this. She’s gonna surprise her BF for X-mas.”
Joy: “You go, Danna!! Give it to him good.”
Dixie: “Thank you Dr Dick for a great year of products. We certainly look forward to the New Year and what it may bring.”
Joy: “Have a very sexy and sensual holiday season everyone. See ya in the New Year.”

Rachel’s Bed Spread (w/cuffs) $64.53

Glenn & Hank

Hank: “Now this is more like it! Rachel’s Bed Spread allows you can create a little bondage magic without the screw anchors and bolts in the ceiling and walls needed for more traditional bondage apparatus.”

Glenn: “I love being restrained spread eagle on the bed. I love relinquishing control to my partner(s) and being ravaged by him/them.”

Hank: “And now we can play like this our own bedroom, or take it on vacation with us.”

Glenn: “These two straps go around the mattress and allow us to attach wrist or ankle cuffs to the straps. The straps are adjustable fitting a twin up to a King Size bed

Hank: “Rachel’s Bed Spread is not the least be threatening. In fact, if you just wanna mess around with some power-play this is just the thing for you.”

Glenn: “But it also works for those of us who are a tad more hardcore.”

Hank: “And it’s a breeze to set up. It only took a few minutes.”

Glenn: “And it’s reasonably priced.”

Hank: “So if you are a rank amateur or a seasoned pro, you’ll have a great time testing your limits. We did!”

Glenn: “We think Rachel’s Pleasures rocks.”

Hank: “We both wish you a Merry Christmas and a very edgy New Year.”

So there ya have it, Sex Fans. We hope our Holiday Extravaganza provided you with lot of swell gift giving ideas. Look for more Product Reviews in the New Year.

December 5, 2008July 1, 2026

Fa la la la la, La la la la

REVIEW #27

Hey sex fans,

Holy mackerel! It’s Week 3 of our Holiday Extravaganza. Did you somehow miss Week 1 or 2 of this lollapalooza? Shame on you! Check out Reviews #25 and 26. You’ll be so glad ya did.

The Dr Dick Review Crew has our review apparatus workin’ overtime. We want to get as many reviews out there before the end of the year. Because we certainly don’t want to leave you hanging…as it were. This week, we have yet another hot juicy load of swell holiday gift giving ideas for you. And guess what? They are all GREEN.

This week’s Review Crew include:

Jack & Karen — Reviews #17, 18, 25

Joy & Dixie— Reviews #6, 12, 16, 17, 18, 23

Me, Dr Dick — Reviews #1 – 5, 7 – 10, 12, 14, 15, 19, 21, 25, 26

Glenn & Hank — Reviews #4, 16, 17, 18, 23. 24

Gina & Kevin — Reviews #4, 13, 16, 17, 18, 23, 24

First up we have two brilliant wooden insertables from my very good friends at Jildos; The Art You Love To Touch! Jildos are American made, hand-crafted works of art. They are produced by a company called: WoodPeckers Roost. Can you stand it? They are made from the most durable, safe materials available and they are GREEN, oh so GREEN.

Hart $69.00

Joy & Dixie

Joy: “I’ve had a hankerin’ for a wooden dildo for ages. I’ve admired them online and even held a few in my hands at our local sex emporium. But nothing compares to owing one and having it inside you.”
Dixie: “That is so true. Hart is simply beautiful. It’s made of exotic Bocote wood, which gives it a very distinctive striped appearance. And besides it’s beauty it is as functional as all get-out. It has a long, smooth shaft that allows you to enjoy deep penetration using either end.”
Joy: “Yeah, and it’s a ‘double header’ too. There is a ball at one end that is ideal for G-spot (or P-spot) stimulation. But it also has a more traditional head on the other end, which is followed by 4 ridges. I love my dildos ridged!”
Dixie: “I agree, I love the rippling sensation too. And I like that it’s size is not overwhelming. It’s 10.5” long, but it’s only 1.25” in diameter at its widest point.”
Joy: “We spent a lot of time trying it every which way. And it is safe to use with all kinds of lubes. We are partial to silicone-based lubes and because Hart is so naturally smooth, a very little bit of lube goes a long way.”
Dixie: “Caring for this beauty is blissfully simple. Wash with warm soapy water and dry thoroughly with a soft cloth. You can also wipe it down with a lint-free towel moistened with peroxide, rubbing alcohol or a 10% bleach solution.”
Joy: “Then you can use the wax packet provided with Hart to restore it’s natural luster. Just rub it on and buff it off.”
Dixie: “Your Jildo Dildo will come with a Certificate of Authenticity and a nice velvet pouch for discreet storage.”
Joy: “Jildos has a wide array of shapes and styles to choose from. This is the ideal holiday gift for the GREEN consumer.”

Whimsy $69.00

Glenn & Hank

Hank: “We have a more manly sized Jildo Dildo. Then do the girls.”
Glenn: “I just love that name! ‘Honey, can you please pass the Jildo Dildo?’”
Hank: “I know, and we don’t even have to christen this one, because it comes with its own name — Whimsy.”
Glenn: “It’s a nice 1.5” wide and a bit shorter, at 10”, than Joy & Dixie’s Hart.”
Hank: “I don’s suppose we have to repeat all the stuff that the girls said about lube, care and cleaning and all, do we? Good!”
Glenn: “Yeah, but we should describe it better.”
Hank: “Oh, ok! It’s made of American Cherry wood.”
Glenn: “Think of it as cherry pie on a stick.”
Hank: “You are such a dork!”
Glenn: “You love it!”
Hank: “Our Whimsy is also a ‘double header’. One end is rounded. Think prostate stimulation…or G-spot stimulation. The other end is bullet shaped. There’s a combination of swirls and ridges, which deliver a variety of sensations with the old in and out.”
Glenn: “Mmmm, in and out!”
Hank: “Have you ever met a hornier bastard?”
Glenn: “I’m an unapologetic power bottom; what can I say? And when Hank works my ass with Whimsy, I’m in pig heaven. And this thing warms to my body very fast. It’s like totally awesome.”
Hank: “He’s so right. I can work this boy in to a froth of sexual frenzy with this thing. And I like that it’s very masculine looking. Despite it’s beauty, it doesn’t look out of place next to all of Glenn’s other insertables.”
Glenn: “And I do have quite a collection. At the same time, we could leave this on the coffee table as an object ‘d art for all to admire.
Hank: “If you’re lookin’ for insertable art for your holiday giving, look no further than a stunning Jildo Dildo.”
Glenn: “One final thing. You absolutely have to check out their dildo lore page. It is amazing.

Keeping with today’s GREEN theme we’ve got a couple of delicious products from a little company in Vancouver, BC called Hathor Aphrodisia.

Lubricant Pure 4 oz $18.00 CAD

I, Dr Dick, have the distinct pleasure of introducing you to Lubricant Pure. I am so fond of this mighty-mite of a company from right here in the beautiful Pacific Northwest. What a joy it is to bring their products to your attention.

Ya’ll know my passion for GREEN adult products, right? Hathor Aphrodisia is a boutique company that brings us only a few choice products, but each one is a work of love.

Lubricant Pure is an exceptionally fine personal lube. It contains pure botanical emollients including Horny Goat Weed, Jujube Zizyphus and Siberian Ginseng, which are supposed to have aphrodisiacal properties. Can’t honestly say I noticed any difference in my sexual response cycle. But as my granny used to say, ‘It couldn’t hurt!’

Lubricant Pure is water-based, so it’s condom compatible. It’s slippery, non-sticky and there’s no fragrance, which really appealed to me. I hate when lubes have an odor.

And as you would guess from a company like this, Lubricant Pure even tastes nice. I mean don’t you just hate getting some lubes in your mouth? I know I do. They taste all chemically?

Sex fans, if you want your sex to be GREEN? Here’s a way to do that and support a fantastic little company that is doing the right thing.

Lubricant Pure makes a great stocking stuffer too.

Lubricant Lickeurs — Coconut Orange 4 oz $22.00 CAD

Lubricant Lickeurs — Coconut Orange 4 oz $22.00 CAD

Gina & Kevin

Karen: “This is so cool. I’m a big tea drinker. Never been one for coffee, but I do know my teas. And since I’m a naturally hyper kinda gal, I try to avoid caffeine as much as possible. These teas are delicious and they are herbal.”

Jack: “I, on the other hand, am not a big tea drinker, but I agree; these teas are good. There’s an earthiness to them that I really liked.

Karen: “First up today is My Maple Cookie. I love it; what a name. This tea is a unique blend of premium herbs specially formulated to change the female genitalia and male semen to smell and taste like maple cookies. How fun is that?”

Jack: “Who would have guessed something like this was even possible. I have to admit, it’s the damnedest thing. Karen and I shared the tin of 12 tea bags over a 10 day period. We both noticed a difference in the way we smelled and tasted. Don’t get me wrong; I love the natural taste of she and me, but this is way fun.”

Karen: “Jack’s right. Although, I sometimes find his cum to be kind of acrid. My Maple Cookie

Jack: “I like the taste of my own jizz. I never find it acrid. But I don’t taste it every day. So I bow to Karen’s critique.”

Karen: “The Intimate Teas website suggests pouring 8 ounces of hot water over a tea bag and let steep for 5 minutes. Then gently squeeze the tea bag to let the active ingredients fully release into the water. You may remove tea bag or allow to stay in water for stronger tea.”

Jack: “This tea is not a miracle worker. It won’t cover a multitude of sins. Hell, even I know to avoid some foods like onions and garlic, a lot of booze and, of course, smoking, if you want your spunk to taste sweeter.” changed that in just two days.To continue this week’s GREEN, and I might add YUMMY, theme we veer toward the food end of the spectrum.

Jack: “Next up we have Screaming O tea. The Intimate Teas people get high marks for the clever names and the packaging.”
Karen: “They sure enough do! This tea is a premium blend of unique herbs made to increase sexual passion in both women and men. It is supposed to be an aphrodisiac, sexual stimulant and it’s supposed to intensify orgasms.”
Jack: “That’s what it says on the website. I was dubious…at first. I figured, I already have intense orgasms, do I really need to improve on that…even if it’s possible?”
Karen: “Things are much different for us gals, but I think you know that already. I felt like the tea really did stimulate me. And maybe it was only wishful thinking, but I felt my orgasms intensified too.”
Jack: “Again, I defer to my lovely wife. One thing for sure; this tea is a stimulant. The first time I had this tea was near bedtime. I thought, a nice cup of warm tea will make me sleep like a baby. NOT! I tossed and turned all night long. But I did have a raging boner in the morning. I don’t know if those two thing are connected, but they did follow one after the other.”
Karen: “Kevin and I split the 12 tea bags between us, like the My Maple Cookie tea. I didn’t drink my tea at bedtime, so I couldn’t corroborate Kevin’s story.”
Jack: “I say, if you’re feelin’ a little pookie in the libido department, give this tea a try. I suspect you will be pleasantly surprised.
Karen: “That goes double for the women in our audience. And these teas come in these charming little tins. They make perfect gifts any time of the year, but especially during the holidays.”

November 8, 2008July 1, 2026

I’m Shocked! —— Part 3

REVIEW #24

Hey sex fans,

We’re back with our final installment in this series that focuses on the pleasures of Erotic Electro Stimulation. And the exceptional products of Paradise Electro Stimulations, PES.

Last week, as you recall, the Dr Dick Review Crew and I introduced you to a slew of very cool PES Electrodes that attach to the PES Power Box. These are the thingies and that actually deliver the stimulation. If you somehow missed either of the first two parts of our presentation, look for REVIEW #22 and #23.

This week the Review Crew will introduce you to even more PES Electrodes. This week they are all pretty much gender specific — for those among us with manly parts.

This week’s Review Crew include:
Glenn & Hank — Reviews #4, 16, 17, 18, 23
Gina & Kevin — Reviews #4, 13, 16, 17, 18, 23

Glenn & Hank introduce us to the PES Tubular Mid Ring Electrode (C087) $70.00 and the PES Testicle Tubular Electrode (C085) $60.00.

Hank: “Ya see, the Tubular Mid-Ring is designed to stimulate various points along your cock shat.”
Glenn: “And the Testicle Tubular Electrode
Hank: “Put these babies together and you have some amazing sensations playing off one another all over your cock and balls.”
Glenn: “The best thing is the Mid-Ring is completely adjustable. It’s made of a flexible tubing that you can disconnect from the brass connection and cut to fit any spot on your dick, even right under your dickhead, like the PES Corona Stimulator. Reconnect the tubing to the brass connection and you’re all set.”
Hank: “The same is true for the Testicle Tubular Electrode. So no one has to worry about a ‘one size fits all’ situation. Because as we all know there is no such thing when it comes to cock and balls.”
Glenn: “I hope you’re all getting the picture that these electrodes, as well as several other single-pole electrodes, can be use to stimulate multiple areas at one time.”
Hank: “In fact, the Power Box is so versatile you can even rig up a three-electrode configuration. For example — one on your dick, one on your balls and one up your ass.”
Glenn: “O baby, oh baby you make me so hot!”
Hank: “Sheesh!”
Glenn: “Hey, I’m just sayin.”
Hank>: “Ok, so here’s how it went down. Glenn and I both wanted to try out this cock ‘n balls configuration, but I got to go first this time. The Mid-Ring was the perfect size for me just as it came out of the package, so I didn’t have to trim it. It landed just south of my frenulum. Perfect! The Testicle Tubular Electrode was a little trickier to get situated, but that wasn’t really much of a problem.”
Glenn: “Once Hank got himself all strapped in, so to speak, I connected the electrodes to the Power Box using the leads. We also made a little side wager. I suggested that Hank trust me with the applying the juice.”
Hank: “Actually, he’s not telling you the whole story. He also wanted to restrain my hands and feet. Glenn takes to the whole bondage thing like a pig to shit, but this was new territory for me. The one being restrained that is.”
Glenn: “So I said oh so sweetly, ‘you can trust me, babe’.”
Hank: “Except he said it with this evil grin on his face. So I’m thinking it’s payback time for everything I’ve dished out to him over the years.”
Glenn: “You know that’s not how thing work. Although the idea of stickin’ it to him real good while he were helpless did cross my mind. I guess I do have a sadistic streak after all. Who knew? And just so you know, I wasn’t talking about a full-on bondage scene anyway. Just some innocent velcro wrist and ankle restraints. What a big sissy!”
Hank: “In the end I gave in and let him have his way. This was a true role reversal for me and it did take some getting used to. But almost immediately my mind was distracted by the intense sensations in my groin. I think not being able to control the sensations myself added to the intensity. I now know what being a bottom is like. While I don’t want to bottom every day, it was a very interesting experience.”
Glenn: “And I like being a bottom more than being a top, but as Hank said, this was fuckin’ hot. As I started to adjust the knobs on the Power Box, I could read the pleasure on Hank’s face. His dick swelled to gigantic proportions. I would have loved to jump on top of him and slide that thing in my ass. But like a good top, this wasn’t about me.”
Hank: “Glenn is right; I’ve never seen my dick bigger. And again, this was a totally ‘hands free’ ride. It was just the electrodes and my meat and nuts. Amazing!”
Glenn: “We didn’t rush anything. In fact, every time Hank came close to cuming I dialed back the power. We did this edge play for over 20 minutes until he was beggin’ me for release. Being in control of his orgasm like this was a complete turn on for me. I never thought I had it in me.”
Hank: “It’s true, man, I was practically crying to have him make me cum. My balls were so full they ached. And the Testicle Tubular Electrode made them feel like basketballs. It was so fuckin intense.”
Glenn: “I finally granted his wish, but not before I shot my wad all over his face.”
Hank: “The bastard actually shot first while I was still moaning to bust my nut. Finally, he let me cum. And I thought I was gonna die right then and there.”
Glenn: “He let out a growl that came from so far down inside him it was like some wild beast. The neighbors must have thought, WTF!
Hank: “I was completely spent. I could barely move.”
Glenn: “It was totally awesome.”
Hank: “Glenn got his chance with these puppies a couple nights later. But we’ll save that story for another time.” is designed to wrap around your nuts, as well as separating each of your balls to spread the e-stim all over your family jewels. You get to adjust the focus by tightening or loosening the fit of the tubing.

Gina & Kevin introduce us to the PES Tubular Base Ring Electrode (C086) $70.00 and the PES Prostate Stimulator Electrode (C092) $133.00.

Gina: “When Kevin and I met, I was like this good little Catholic girl. About as sexually adventurous as I ever got was having sex with the lights on. I mean it, I must have been a real piece of work.”
Kevin: “Yeah, it was like she had just escaped from a convent or something. She was like totally adorable, with this knock-out body, but she was so timid and shy and like completely inexperienced.”
Gina: “But look at me now! Thanks to Kevin and our own devious Dr Dick I’ve gotten in touch with my inner ‘Dom’. Despite my feminist leanings, I thought women were always subservient to men in the bedroom. I never realized there were ‘Sub’ men. And anyone who didn’t know Kevin and my little secret would never guess he loves to be dominated. I mean, it came as a huge surprise to me.”
Kevin: “It’s true. Until that fateful first review I did as part of Dr Dick’s Review Crew. I never new I had an inner ‘Sub’ just dying to get out. I just thought I like things in my ass.”
Gina: “There’s so much more to this sex stuff than what meets the eye, huh? I am so grateful to have had this opportunity to wake myself up to the erotic world around me.”
Kevin: “So we have two electrodes to tell you about. The Tubular Base Ring is much like the one Glenn and Hank used, only it’s larger and fits down at the base of your cock. It’s designed to send intense stimulation all over your dick and down into your pelvis. Because it’s uni-polar, ya have to use it in combination with another electrode. Ya get it?”
Gina: “To be truthful, we didn’t get it right away either. We both discovered that a single pole electrode, like the Tubular Base Ring, has to be used in conjunction with another single pole electrode to complete the erotic electro circuit.”
Kevin: “Doesn’t she sound like Suzie Scientist?”
Gina: “Shut up!”
Kevin: “Luckily we had this other electrode, the Prostate Stimulator, (Mmmm, prostate stimulation) to use with the Base Ring.”
Gina: “Yeah, I mean how lucky was that, butt boy?”
Kevin: “By the way, the Tubular Ring can be cut to size to allow for a more individual fit. The Prostate Stimulator, on the other hand is made up of two basic components: A flexible T-shaped stem with a chrome plated electro conductive sphere at the tip.”
Gina: “The flexibility is what makes this thing so special. It focuses the electro stimulation right where you want it.”
Kevin: “You can bend the vertical flexible shaft so it lands the conductive sphere smack-dab on your P-spot. Trust me, this will give you a “hands free” cum shot for damn sure.”
Gina: “I really got into this e-stim thing this time around. I confess I was way too anxious about the whole thing last time.”
Kevin: “Yeah, she really got into it this time. Her inner ‘Dom’ took over. She even dressed the part — black stockings and stiletto heals. She cuffed me, both hands and feet, to the mattress (Thanks Sportsheets!) and teased me with her strap-on. I got her one for our anniversary.”
Gina: “Isn’t he romantic?”
Kevin: “I was helpless, so she had to lube me up and place the electrodes and leads.”
Gina: “I used latex gloves, so no worries. By the way, I discovered that latex gloves make a nice smacking sound when you slapping a bad boy’s bare butt.”
Kevin: “Isn’t SHE romantic? Oh SNAP!”
Gina: “I started to really get off on the power I had over him. I never really felt anything like it in the past. It’s funny, because I seemed to know exactly what to do right from the start. Basically, I did what Glenn did to Hank, the whole edging thing, although I didn’t know it was called edging.”
Kevin: “She was all about teasing me with the juice. She started real slow, too slow in fact. I told her she had to turn the damned thing up; I could barely feel it. She slapped my ass real good and told me pipe down because now she was in charge.”
Gina: “I loved it. I even goosed the power up a bit just to prove my point. The shock made him stand up and take note, both literally and figuratively.”
Kevin: “I think I’ve created a monster.”
Gina: “You love it. So I kept this up while I turned my strap-on dong vibe on myself. The more Kevin was writhing in ecstasy and the more he was telling me the dirty things he wanted me to do to him, the closer I got to cuming myself.”
Kevin: “This was the most intense prostate stimulation I ever felt. And because the sensations were also all up and down my cock at the same time I could barely stand it.”
Gina: “We miraculously came at the same time, which like never happens.”
Kevin: “I know; and I didn’t even touch my dick or Gina for that matter. It was like this wild sexual energy was passing between us.”
Gina: “We both recommend Erotic Electro Stimulation to anyone who wants something a little out of the ordinary.”
Kevin: “And you can quote us on that.”

The Review Crew wants to remind everyone of the importance of lubrication when playing with EES. And make sure it is water based lube. Shaving the areas where the electrodes will be placed is highly recommended.

Clean up is relatively easy too. Most of the electrodes can be cleaned up with a few drops of dishwashing liquid and a soft, lint-free towel. They can also be sanitized using a 10% bleach solution. But NEVER SOAK your electrodes. You can also spray your electrodes with isopropyl alcohol before drying and storing.

In closing, we want to say that the PES website was an essential resource for all of us before we started our play as well as in helping us understand how Erotic Electro Stimulation works. We encourage you to visit their website too. It’s chock-full of very useful and informative stuff. They have galleries, safety tips, product information, tons of links and even a fantastic discussion board, where you can interact with other EES connoisseurs.

ENJOY

October 31, 2008July 1, 2026

I’m Shocked! —— Part 2

REVIEW #23

Hey sex fans,

We’re back with Part 2 in this series that will focus on the exceptional products from the pervy and oh so edgy folks at Paradise Electro Stimulations, PES.

Last week, as you recall, the Dr Dick Review Crew and I introduced you to the concept of Erotic Electro Stimulation in general and the PES Power Box in particular. If you somehow missed this important first part of our presentation, look for Review #22.

This week the Review Crew will introduce you to some of the PES Electrodes that attach to the PES Power Box. These are the thingies and that actually deliver the stimulation. You’ll notice that some of these products are gender specific, others are can be used by either sex.

This week’s Review Crew include:

Glenn & Hank — Reviews #4, 16, 17, 18
Gina & Kevin — Reviews #4, 13, 16, 17, 18
Joy & Dixie— Reviews #6, 12, 16, 17, 18

Joy & Dixie introduce us to the newly redesigned PES Vaginal Plug. It directs the flow of Erotic Electro Stimulating current right inside your pussy. You lucky Ladies! All us pussy-less folk can only guess at the bliss we’re missing. By the way, neither Joy nor Dixie had ever played with Erotic Electro Stimulation before.

PES Vaginal Plug (C066) $190.00

Joy: “This plug has two conductive surfaces, one on each side of the beautifully sleek acrylic shaft. We discovered that the plug works best when fully inserted in my pussy before we turned on the Power Box.“
Dixie: “Also, be aware that shifting the plug once it’s in place will redirect the stimulation, which just makes sense, right?”

(Like we learned last week, it’s always advisable to lower power levels before shifting the position of any of the PES Electrodes. And when adjusting the levels, the higher the pulse and frequency, the more intense the stimulation.)

Joy: “Once I inserted the plug and took a few deep breaths to relax, I slowly began to adjust the pulse and frequency knobs upward. I began to feel involuntary muscle contractions inside my pussy. This was a totally new sensation for me. It was completely unlike what I experience with an insertable vibrator. In record time I had my first orgasm. I was like, ‘holy shit, I am in love!”
Dixie: “It was so amazing to watch. Joy didn’t do a thing, but lean back against a pillow and manipulate the knobs on the Power Box. The PES Vaginal Plug did all the work. When Joy uses one of her dildos, even one of the vibrating ones, she always has to manually pump it in and out.”
Joy: “I can safely say that this was my very first hands-free orgasm ever. It was completely effortless. I could feel the electro stimulation in my clit too. It was totally wild. Like Dixie said, it wasn’t friction that was causing the sensations, because there was no in and out movement. Over the next 15 or 20 minutes I had multiple orgasms. But there was none of that ‘raw’ feeling in my pussy afterward, like I often get when I use my vibes.”
Dixie: “I was way more nervous about using this thing than Joy. I had to talk myself down from connecting the dots, as it were. Here is this thing, the Power Box plugged into an outlet in the wall and wires from it were attached to the Vaginal Plug. And that was now inside my cunt. Good thing Joy went first, or I wouldn’t have been able to get past the whole electrocution scene playing out in my head. Joy held my hand and I adjusted the knobs on the Power Box. It was such an unfamiliar sensation that it took me a while to decide if I liked it or not. I did notice that adjusting the Vaginal Plug placement and depth in my cunt stimulated different nerve paths, which produced a variety of sensations. Once I could relax and give myself the space to experience the tingly feelings, I too had a whopper of an orgasm. Relaxation is key, at least at first.”
Joy: “There a round opening in the base that allows access to one’s clit for manual stimulation. Not that I needed that necessarily. It also comes with these dainty latex straps to hold the thing in place. Dixie like the straps more than I did.”
Dixie: “Lubrication is a must! I mean, that seems obvious but lube is important for more than just making insertion easier. It also plays an essential role in the effectiveness of the electrode. We used ElectroLube; and recommend it highly.”
Joy: “We both realize that these are very expensive toys, but boy are they worth it.”
Dixie: “Getting past the wires was more difficult for me. But I agree with Joy, this is amazing stuff.”

Glenn & Hank introduce us to the PES Acrylic Anal Plug. It directs the flow of Erotic Electro Stimulating current right inside your ass. Since we all have an asshole, none of us will be left wondering what we’re missing, just because we don’t have the right parts. Hank and Glenn have a limited amount of experience with e-stim. They use Electro Stimulation as part of their BDSM play.

PES Acrylic Anal Plug (C072) $150.00

Glenn: “The PES Electro Anal Plug is beautiful. It’s a smooth acrylic plug with conductive surfaces on either side. These stimulate your sphincter muscle, prostate and all up inside your hole. If you’re a bottom, you’re gonna love this shit.”
Hank: “He knows of what he speaks!
Glenn: “Unlike Joy and Dixie, me and Hank like it nasty.
Hank: “The nastier the better.”
Glenn: “Like all butt plugs, the PES Electro Anal Plug slips in your ass allowing your sphincter to close down around the notch in the plug keeping the puppy in place.”
Hank: “Glenn’s got the tightest ass of any power bottom I’ve ever known. Must be all those kegels. When he clamps down on my fingers, it’s enough to snap ‘em in two.”
Glenn: “Awww shucks, you say the sweetest things, babe.”
Hank: “We want to reinforce everything that Dixie and Joy said about the importance of lube. Not only for insertion purposes but to ass-ist in conductivity.”
Glenn: “So I’m in the sling at our bud’s dungeon. Hank and our friend, Tad, are workin’ me over real good with some fine rope work. I have a gag in my mouth.”
Hank: “That gag provides me the only peace I get all week.”
Glenn: “BITCH! Anyhow, as I was saying before I was so rudely interrupted, I have a gag in my mouth and a hood over my head and some weights on my balls. The paddle stings. The cane raises little welts on my glues. It hurts like hell and I’m in heaven.”
Hank: “Then comes the ass ass-ult. We lube up Glenn’s ass and the Electro Anal Plug and drive it home. This is not a super-sized plug by any means, but it doesn’t have to be.”
Glenn: “Hee haw! Slap me and call me names.”
Hank: “Glenn is such a pain pig. Tad and I add a blindfold, check the ropes and give Glenn the juice.”
Glenn: “I can’t feel anything but the sensations in my ass. I buck as much as I can with pain/pleasure. My ass is on fire, but I still clamp my sphincter down on the plug for extra measure.”
Hank: “Precum dribbles from his cock. He writhes as he rides the edge. Bubbles of saliva encircle the ball gag. There’s a grimace on his face. Finally, he raises his middle finger in a “fuck you” salute and we shut down the Power Box.”
Glenn: “When I’m gagged the “fuck you” salute is my safe word, or better my safe gesture. Twenty minutes of this and I am completely spent. I don’t even need to cum, I am that satisfied.”

Hank & Glenn introduce us to the PES Corona Stimulator. It’s one three corona focused PES Electrodes that target the Erotic Electro Stimulation to a your cockhead. Pity the dick-less among us who’ll never know the ecstasy of this kind of erotic charge.

PES Corona Stimulator (C082) $79.00

Hank: “While Glenn was taking a smoke break over in the corner. Tad and I had the Power Box to ourselves. I was eager to try the PES Corona Stimulator.”
Glenn: “I’m actually surprised Hank was up for this. I’m the edgy pervert one in the family.
Hank: “Part of being on the Review Crew is expanding our limits, right? And I’m into my dick the way Glenn is into his ass. That’s why the PES Corona Stimulator interested me. So I thought I would take it for a little test drive.
Glenn: “This, of course, aroused my attention right away. Hank has the most beautiful, big, fat uncut dick in town. I get all moist just seein it flop around when he’s strollin’ around the house in the buff. So I mozied on over to where Tad and he are hookin’ him up to PES Corona Stimulator.”
Hank: “I skinned back my foreskin and slipped the electrode over my dickhead. I confess to being a little nervous, which actually turned out to be a good thing. It would have been really uncomfortable trying to slip the head of my cock into this thing if I was hard.”
Glenn: “I told you he had a big dick.”
Hank: “I adjusted the PES Corona Stimulator
Glenn: “Ya gotta use a lot of lube for this.”
Hank: “I used the Corona Stimulator with the Tubular Mid-Ring, which promised to pretty much carry the stimulation through my entire shaft. Once I had everything in place and wired up I was ready to go for it.
Glenn: “Hank was still a little tentative, so I decided to put on a little show for him. I got down on my knees and started to deep throat Tad’s meat. This got Hank’s dick to swell.”
Hank: “I really couldn’t jerk myself, like I normally would, so I started to fiddle with the knobs on the Power Box. I began to feel a tingle as I tuned up the juice. In moments I was rock hard. The sensations were incredible. Before that night I had never experienced a “hands free” orgasm. It was fuckin fantastic. I thought I was gonna cum my guts out.
Glenn: “It was pretty, alright.
Hank: “Here’s a tip: be sure shave any hair you might have off your shaft. You don’t want hot spots, so that the top part laid over my piss slit. The ring goes around the head and connection doohickey hits me at my frenulum.”

Gina & Kevin introduce us to the PES Electro-Flex Anal Plug. It directs the flow of Erotic Electro Stimulating current right inside your ass. Again, since we all have an asshole, none of us have to miss out on all the fun just because we don’t have the right parts. Kevin and Gina are e-stim virgins.

PES Electro-Flex Anal Plug (C071) $196.00

Gina: “Look everybody, we’re back with yet another butt toy for my sweet little Kevie’s booty.”
Kevin: “It does look like I’m getting all the attention, huh?
Gina: “It’s ok, because this Electro stuff scares me. I mean I know it’s safe and all, but like Dixie I have this natural aversion to wires and my private parts. I admit; I’m old fashioned that way.”
Kevin: “LOL! Yeah she’s just like the gal that married dear old dad. NOT!”
Gina: “Shut up!”
Kevin: “Moving right along, the PES Electro-Flex Anal Plug
Gina: “I have to admit; it is pretty harmless looking. And it’s flexible to a degree. You can even bend it a bit to an angle and it will hold its shape. I would consider using it myself, as a pussy plug, but not with it plugged in.”
Kevin: “The plug has two separate electro pads, neither one is as obvious as Glenn’s. Both are positioned on the plug to stimulate precise areas. One pad runs the entire length of the plug, for contact with my sphincter muscle. The second, smaller pad is positioned opposite the first, along the plug’s head where it stimulated my prostate. We used plenty of the ElectroLube that came with the plug, both inside my ass and on the plug itself.”
Gina: “By the way, we learned that you can use this electrode alone or in conjunction with another electrode, like the one that would go on your penis. But more about that later.”
Kevin: “Yeah ok so, here I am all lubed up and ready to go and then I get cold feet. I know, what a pussy, huh?
Gina: “I think that was my fault. I was all nervous and I’m sure that my anxiety made him nervous. Then finally I just said, ‘Go for it. How bad could it be?’”
Kevin: “I began to turn up the juice, as Hank put it. It was like so friggin amazing. The first thing I felt was involuntary muscle contractions in my sphincter. This made the plug kinda dance rhythmically in my hole. I almost shot my wad right then and there.”
Gina: “OMG, you should have seen his face. It was like he saw the heavens open. He kept trying to grab my hand and guide it to his penis. But I was afraid I was gonna get a shock.”
Kevin: “I kept telling her it would be ok. I certainly could feel the sensations in my cock and balls, but not in my hands when I touched myself.”
Gina: “Finally I relented and let him eat me out while this thing was working his butt. I know, generous of me, huh? He devoured my pussy with an unexpected hunger. I guess I need to feed his bottom like this more often.”
Kevin: “I know; I was like some sex craved maniac. She loved it. So did I. We even came together, and I didn’t even touch my dick. That was like a total first for me.
Guys, if you’re into your ass, like me, there is nothing like Erotic Electro Stimulation. Period.” is totally different from the plug that Glenn had in his talented ass. Instead of being made of acrylic, like his, mine is made of a conductive silicone elastomer. This makes it kinda soft as opposed to rigid, like Glenn’s.

May 3, 2008June 18, 2026

Happy Holes Ahead!

Look for my new

Product Review!

Aneros Prostate Massagers!

“They have an ergonomic elegance about them. They actually remind me of a finely crafted medical device. No surprise there, I suppose; since each Aneros massager is the product of years of research and development. And just so you don’t think I’m pullin’ your leg — these are the only medically patented prostate massagers on the market.”

Aneros – Helix, MGX, Progasm

Hey Sex Fans!

If you’re a guy (or you know someone who is) and you have a butt hole (or the guy you know has one), I’ve got some swell news for YOU! I want to introduce you to three hands-free prostate and perineum massagers that have cum my way. I haven’t been this excited (literally and figuratively) about a line of adult products in a very long time.

Finally, someone got it right! The first thing I want to say about these Aneros products is they are designed and developed by folks who are as serious about prostate health as they are about prostate pleasure. Listen, I’m all in favor of toys that have no other purpose than to dispense a good dose of the jollies. But if a fella can pleasure himself AND do himself some good health-wise…all at the same time; well that just about beats the pants off diddlin’ just for fun.

Before we get down to actually landin’ these babies where the sun don’t shine; I have some general comments to make. Each Aneros product has a unique shape. And there’s a shape for every anal-pleasure experience level — from rank amateur to professional butt pirate.

They’re made of firm, durable, non-toxic plastic. They clean up in a jiffy. Warm water and a mild detergent do just fine. You can also sterilize them by dropping ‘em in boiling water for a couple of minutes. Hell, ya can even pop ‘em in the dishwasher too. What could be easier?

They have an ergonomic elegance about them. They actually remind me of a finely crafted medical device. No surprise there, I suppose; since each Aneros massager is the product of years of research and development. And just so you don’t think I’m pullin’ your leg — these are the only medically patented prostate massagers on the market.

Their Zen-like simplicity is a marvel in and of itself. There are no batteries to wear down, no wires to fumble with. These beauties works their magic in harmony with your body’s own movements. Just lifting or repositioning your leg, tensing your PC muscle, or rolling on your side will stimulate and invigorate your prostate and perineum in a slightly different way. It’s truly amazing. I discovered that if I did a few crunches while my Aneros massager was lodged within; what was previously a workout drudgery became a tingly delight.

Since I had three Aneros products to review, I decided to share the wealth, so to speak. I wanted to find three uninhibited men who were up for an afternoon of prostate pleasuring. I apparently know the right kind of guys, because the very first three fellas I invited jumped at the opportunity. And best of all, we covered the spectrum of anal play experience.

I told my visitors that we had one simple task — to agree or disagree with the Aneros claim that their stimulators increase one’s sexual performance and stamina, facilitate a stronger erection and enhance orgasmic pleasure. Before we set to work, however, I had to remind my friends that we gathered together and dropped our drawers purely in the name of science. So I insisted that they wipe those stupid grins off their faces right away! 😉

Kevin — single, straight, 25 — was the youngest and least experienced among us. (He’s never had more than a finger in his ass.) He chose the Aneros MGX as his challenge. Despite it’s modest girth, he was still a bit apprehensive.

Glenn — partnered, gay, 33 — was the most experienced among us. He’s pretty smug about his talented ass and proudly identifies himself as a power-bottom extraordinaire. Initially he scoffed at all three stimulators. “Shit, I could take all three of them at once!” He proclaimed. I handed him the Aneros Progasm, the largest stimulator of the bunch, and told him to park his famous ass and shut his pie hole for the time being.

Carlos — married, “mostly straight,” 46 — has experimented with a couple of anal toys and would like to do more. He wants to get his wife involved too. However, he’s been having some prostate problems lately, so he was unsure how helpful he’d be. He got the Aneros Helix.

We shared our initial reactions to each product — how they looked and felt in our hand. We talked about what our expectations were, if any. We took note of the different shapes and the configuration of the Perineum Tab and K-Tab on each.

I gotta tell ya, we all were stumped by the K-Tab reference. I actually had to go to the Aneros website for an explanation. “Kundalini or “K-Tab” is supposed to add sensations up and down your spine similar to the sensations you’re feeling through your prostate.” Ok, the “Kundalini” reference is way too esoteric for me. I realize this is some kind of tantric reference, but please! Basically the K-Tab hits below your tailbone or coccyx. Sheesh!

Now that my guests and I are all comfortable and naked; the fun begins in earnest. Kevin realizes that he’s gonna need lube to insert his MGX. (Actually everyone needs lube for ass play of any kind. But ya’ll know that already, huh?) Unfortunately, Kevin was using a dainty amount of lube right on his pucker. I guess he thought that was gonna do the trick. He was oh so wrong! Listen up; ya gotta lube the whole chute, don’t cha’ know.

Glenn leaned over with one of the Marksman water-based lube shooters that came with the Aneros stimulators. He showed Kevin how to pop the top, insert the shooter stem to deep-lube his hole. “Ahhh, much better!” Kevin proclaimed. On his side with his lower leg straight and his upper leg cocked to his stomach, he tired to insert the MGX. But failed. I think he was pretty nervous and there was a fair amount of performance anxiety goin’ on too. It didn’t help that, we his audience, were looking on with great anticipation.

Carlos reached over and held Kevin’s upper leg, so he wouldn’t have to tense to hold the position. Then he said; “relax and breathe deep.” Kevin’s next try was successful. As soon as the MGX slipped into place, with its head knockin’ on his prostate, Kevin’s eyes rolled back in his head and he let out a whimper. “Damn! Holy Shit!”

Kevin was a little nervous about lowering his leg, because that movement slightly altered the position of the MGX. Each time he moved, he got a jolt of pleasure. Finally, he was able to roll on to his back and lowered his leg. I told him to do some Kegel exercises. “Tighten your P.C. muscle (like you would if your were trying to stop the flow of pee) and hold that contraction for a slow count of 3. Then relax. Next, contract and relax your P.C. muscle as rapidly as you can — like a flutter.”

Kevin was oozing precum like there was no tomorrow. He had a rock-hard hardon. Ok, so he’s 25, all his boners are rock-hard. He did say, however, that he was afraid to touch his cock, because he thought he’d shoot his load for sure if he did. And he didn’t want to cum right away. He wanted to ride all these new sensations he was having.

Carlos was next. He popped the top and administered his Marksman lube shooter like a pro. His previous experience with ass toys insured an effortless insertion. Maybe because of his enlarged prostate, the Helix hit home with a bang…as it were, and it took his breath away.

Carlos admitted that the experience was right on the edge of being uncomfortable at first. I reminded him that the good people at Aneros suggest that everyone take his time to acquaint his butt with one of their stimulators. “Ya gotta be patient, darlin’!” I insisted. “Your body needs a chance to get familiar with its new friend.”

Carlos worked through the initial discomfort with deep breathing, Kegels and yankin’ on his balls to move the sexual energy around. He too had a powerful hardon and more than the usual amount of precum. This surprised him. Because of his enlarged prostate, Carlos found that he needed to take a break and remove the Helix every once in a while. This was fine with him, because reinserting it was so much fun.

While Carlos and Kevin were riding their stimulators, Glenn was preparing himself for disappointment. He was sure his Progasm was gonna be a bust. He put on a cockring, because he assumed he would need one. No “little” insertable was gonna challenge his pro-hole or give him wood either…or so he thought.

Glenn’s poop chute devoured the Progasm like it was a snack. It slipped into place with an audible pop. We all giggled like schoolgirls. Sure enough, the girth of the Progasm was like playing house for him. What Glenn didn’t count on was the P-Tab and the K-Tab. These little numbers made all the difference in the world. None of his other ass toys had anything like this.

When Glenn could finally admit that bigger isn’t always better, he realized the potential of the Progasm. As every power- bottom will tell you — the secret to enjoying a big toy and/or a ferocious fuck is pelvic muscle control. If you keep your muscles (including your PC muscle) in tip-top shape, a wealth of pleasure awaits you. If you go loose in the caboose…so to speak, you pay the price in pleasure and sphincter control.

While the Progasm didn’t come close to “filling him up,” it did hit the spot. The P-Tab and the K-Tab riveted the Progasm head to his prostate while adding the additional stimulation of his “taint” (perineum) and spine. This was all new territory for Glenn. He found that he had to work at tightening his PC muscle around the more modestly sized Progasm shank. This exercised his muscles more; delivering more pleasure.

Glenn had to remove his cockring because his wood was gettin’ too intense. “Ok, I’m a believer. This thing is pretty fuckin’ amazing! I’m sold, big time!”

Our afternoon session ended in an explosive manner. After only 20 minutes with his MGX, Kevin couldn’t stand it any longer and popped a wad that hurled well over his shoulder. We all cheered him on as he writhed in delicious agony. (Funny how pleasure and pain register as the same on one’s face.) He pulled the plug from his ass and fought to catch his breath. As his dick softened it continued to dribble spooge into a pool near his navel. “This thing rocks!”

Carlos decided to finish himself off without the Helix in place. He said he liked the butt play a lot; it just became too intense as he neared orgasm. He finally gave up his spunk in three waves of bliss. He was surprised at the amount of cum he produced. He figured it was the prostate massage that milked more cum out of him. However, he reported that his prostate was very tender after the orgasm. He though he needed to take more time with the Helix or maybe try the MGX next time.

Meanwhile, Glenn was edging — playing with his sexual tension as he jerked off. He would come right up to the point of ejaculating, and then he’d suddenly let go of his dick. Its hardness would slap against his belly. When the urge to cum subsided he’d start to handle himself again. He said he could usually delay his ejaculation for an hour doing this. Not today, though. The Progasm altered his edging performance and brought him closer to cuming more frequently, until he finally let fly. He said edging usually makes for a more intense orgasm, but this time, with the Progasm pluggin his happy hole, he felt several mini orgasmic quakes before the big one hit. “Like I said, I’m sold!”

As my guests lay spent on the floor, I asked them to rate their particular Aneros product, on a scale of 1-10 — 10 being the highest. Kevin gave his MGX a 10.0. He was gonna go online and buy his own just as soon as he got home. Glenn was happy to be proven wrong. He gave the Progasm a 8.5. He thought he’d probably buy his own, as well. He asked if he could borrow the MGX for his partner, who never bottoms, to try. Carlos rated the Helix at 9.0, but his experience at 8.0. Like he said, I need more time to work with one of these things on my sensitive prostate. He wanted to introduce his wife to the concept and asked if he could borrow the Helix for some homework.

As for me, I tried all three stimulators, I found the Helix fit me best. I sympathized with Carlos and the trouble he has with his enlarged prostate. I know the feeling. Lots of men our age and older are similarly troubled. However, I am discovering that a regular routine of Aneros prostate massage therapy is making a big difference. It’s assisting me in achieving better pelvic muscle tone and increasing oxygen-rich blood flow. This is reducing the size of my prostate and making my erections firmer. Firmer erections mean more sensitivity. And greater sensitivity means more pleasure. It’s a win-win situation all around.

Anyone who knows me knows that I am a fierce advocate for prostate self-awareness. At the risk of generalizing from my experience, I’d say there’s a very good chance that regular use of an Aneros stimulator will facilitate prostate health and vitality in most men. And a healthy prostate, increased blood flow and added muscle control are the kingpins of powerful orgasms, rejuvenated sexual ability, and stamina, as well as a stiffer cock. So, like I said; “if a fella can pleasure himself AND do himself some good health-wise…all at the same time; well that just about beat the pants off just diddlin’ just for fun.”

ENJOY!